My Other Half
by Christobel Cullen
Summary: Bella is a student at the University of Alaska. She's fiercely independent, but everything changes when she meets a stranger who refuses to leave her side. This story explores the subject of vampire mating. AU
1. Chapter 1

**My Other Half**

Bella is a student at the University of Alaska. She's fiercely independent, but everything changes when she meets a stranger who refuses to leave her side. This story explores the subject of vampire mating. AU

_The main characters aren't mine, they belong to Stephanie Meyer. Thanks SM for letting us play with your creations!_

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A/N: I know most of you who have me on Author Alert are very loyal Jasper fans. Sorry, but this isn't a Jasper story. I'm still writing about Jasper and Bella on the two separate stories - **Aching Looks and Breaking Hearts** and **Life Together**. But, I couldn't get this story out of my head and it made me happy to write it. What does it mean for a vampire to find his or her mate? I'm really fascinated by the idea and wanted to explore it. Others have done it much better than me, but I wanted to add my contribution to the fandom. Hope you like it.

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After Mom married Phil I could see how much she missed him when he was away. I had never been in love, so I didn't fully understand that kind of longing, but it was interesting to observe. She had matured a bit when she met him, and he seemed to bring out the best in her. Renee was a better person because of Phil. I had to admit that. She was still a scatterbrain and somewhat flakey, but she had a new sense of peace and confidence that she carried. Except, when he was away, traveling, she acted like part of her soul was missing. She was miserable.

Because of this, I made a decision. I was going to gain my independence a little earlier than I originally imagined. At the beginning of my junior year of high school, I met with my guidance counselor and designed a plan to take community college classes at night in addition to my high school AP classes during the day. These courses would satisfy high school graduation requirements and I would be able to graduate by the end of the year. At first, Renee baulked. She believed I could handle the work, but she wanted me to experience the supposed "magical" senior year of high school – with football games, spring break trips and prom and all the other traditions.

Did she know me at all? I was never into that kind of stuff. I wasn't anti-social at school, but I was studious, preferring to read at home on a Friday night than go to the mall with my friends. I definitely wasn't extroverted and I would not miss senior year...at all.

"Oh, Bella, you're 17 going on 30..." Renee sighed, as she signed the consent forms.

I quickly dismissed the resentment I suddenly felt upon hearing her words. She was right – I was more mature than most girls my age. But, Renee was part of the reason I had to grow up so quickly. I was the one who had to take care of _her_, as well as myself. I couldn't admit that out loud, though, even if she was well aware of it. It would've been stating the obvious. And, really, although I may have felt a little resentment about the reversal of our roles, I didn't regret the way things were turning out. I sincerely did not care if I had a senior year of high school. I was actually looking forward to being on my own, not responsible for anyone but myself.

"You could always go live with your Father, in Forks, if you want to get away from Phoenix," Renee told me, as she handed me the forms. For a person who was easily distracted, she was also incredibly perceptive.

"Forks?" I replied, with exaggerated disgust. "It's cold and wet...and ugh. No thank you."

Renee smiled. "Good. I would miss you, anyway," she responded sincerely, standing up to give me a hug, then walked to the house phone to call Phil.

I actually had considered living with Charlie as an option. We weren't close, but he was still my father. I loved him. Our personalities were more similar than me and Renee. We were both quiet, not needing to talk, rarely complaining, suffer in silence kind of people. I saw him during major holidays and for a couple of weeks of vacation during the summer. Living with him wouldn't be so bad, but I honestly could not see myself in _Forks_. Although I was exaggerating for Renee's benefit, it really was cold and wet and if I was going to be miserable, I'd rather be miserable in a place with sunshine.

_Was_ I miserable? No. But, I suspected I would be in Forks. That's why I decided to go the "graduate early" route. It was only a year and at the end of it, I would go off to college, giving Renee freedom to be with Phil and giving myself freedom to be on my own.

It was an incredibly busy year. My daily schedule was from 7am – 2:30pm I was at high school, from 2:30pm – 5:00pm I was at the library doing homework, 5:00pm – 6:00pm I went home to make and eat dinner with Renee, then from 6:30pm – 9:00pm I was at the community college taking classes. On the weekends I slept and did more homework. I barely saw Renee, and she even occasionally left me on my own a few times a month, to go visit Phil. It was a challenge to balance my time, but academically I was handling myself very well. I was surprised that I was capable of handling such a rigourous workload.

When graduation day arrived, Charlie came down from Forks and Phil came off the road, and Renee was beaming with excitement, proud of me for graduating a year early. After the ceremony, we went out to dinner and I took the moment to announce my plans for college, when Charlie brought up the subject.

"So, Bells, are you finally going to _relax_? You've worked so hard," Charlie asked, his tone betraying that he didn't fully understand why I rushed to finish high school. I never explained my reasons for wanting to graduate early, although it seemed pretty obvious to me.

"I'll be in Jacksonville this summer. You and your mom could join me," Phil suggested. "You could go to the beach, meet some kids your age?" Renee's eyes lit up at the idea and she looked at me expectantly.

"Or you could spend the summer with me in Forks?" Charlie added, his eyes hopeful.

It was kind of cute that my parents were competing to spend time with me. But, I had already made up my mind.

"Well...I've actually decided to start school early...I've..."

"Bella!" Renee interrupted with a shriek. "You're becoming a workaholic! You need to take a break, have some fun! You're only young once!"

I didn't respond immediately, thinking of how Renee continued to have "fun" throughout her adult years and probably acted younger than I did. Fun was overrated, anyway.

Charlie noticed my reaction and tried to ease the awkwardness.

"Where have you decided to go?" he asked.

Good question. But, I knew my answer wouldn't calm Renee down.

"The University of Alaska at Fairbanks," I answered quietly.

Charlie, Renee and even Phil's mouths dropped open in shock. Alaska was the last place they expected me to go to college. I already knew their main objections before they said it themselves. A) It was very far away and B) It was cold in Alaska and I hated the cold.

"It's a dry cold, not a _moist_ cold, like in Forks," I spoke before they could protest. "And the summers are warm with daylight almost 24 hours a day."

Renee didn't shriek, but she was obviously confused and surprised. "Bella..._Alaska_? Really?"

It was an odd choice, I couldn't disagree with that. When I started to apply to college, months earlier, In my bedroom, I had a map of the United States. With a gold star, I marked all the locations that interested me. My entire life I'd lived in Arizona. I'd never traveled, except to California for vacation, Washington when I was child visiting Charlie, and to New Mexico for adventures with Renee. I wanted something different. So, I applied to random schools on the East Coast and in the Southeast...and _Alaska_. It was somewhat of a joke, really, but I also felt compelled to do it.

When the acceptance letters and scholarship offers arrived, I had many options to choose from. I thought long and hard about it and Alaska kept coming to the forefront of my mind. It haunted me. I even had dreams about it. Although it didn't make sense, I knew it was where I was supposed to be. But, I couldn't convince my parents that I was going to this school because I had a "gut" feeling about it.

"I was given a full academic scholarship, including room and board," I responded. The incredulity didn't leave their faces. They knew I was probably offered full scholarships to many schools.

I shrugged. "If I don't like it, I can always transfer."

"When are you leaving?" Charlie asked.

"In a couple of weeks. They have an early enrollment summer program...it's a requirement for my scholarship."

_Requirement _wasn't exactly true. It was optional, but I had no reason to remain in Phoenix.

Renee sighed. "You're only seventeen..." she murmured.

I resisted the urge to roll my eyes. A year ago she was saying I was seventeen going on thirty. Now I was too young to go to college?

"I'll be eighteen in September," I reminded her.

Renee nodded, but she and Charlie both looked worried for me. I appreciated their concern, but felt it was a little late. Most parents were actively involved in helping their teenager choose where to go to college. I hadn't exactly hid the process from Renee and Charlie. On the phone with Charlie, whenever I tried to bring it up, he always told me he trusted my decision and that I had a good head on my shoulders. When I tried to show Renee different college brochures, she would look at them for a second, then become distracted by something more important.

So, no. I wasn't going to feel guilty for making my own decision about _my_ future. _I _would be the one to live with the consequences, anyway, not them.

"Our girl is growing up so fast," Phil remarked, winking at me. He wasn't as worried about me as my parents, obviously, since he wasn't as emotionally invested as a new, often absent, step father. But, he wasn't a bad guy, either. "We can visit her at Christmas, Renee...or she can visit us in Florida."

My mother's face lit up, whether it was from the suggestion of visiting me or the reminder she would be moving to Florida, I didn't know.

"I'm proud of you, Bells. I know you'll be very successful at whatever you decide to do with your life," Charlie encouraged.

"Thanks, Dad," I replied with a smile.

Two weeks after graduation from high school, I arrived in Fairbanks. Despite my fierce independence, moving to a new state, one that was the complete opposite of the desert terrain of Arizona, was daunting. Alaska was breathtakingly beautiful, but it was very isolated. I didn't know a single person. Had I made the right decision?

These worries only lasted for a moment. I quickly pushed them out of my head. The decision had been made. I was sticking with it. I would miss the warmth of Arizona, and I would miss Renee, but I had the satisfaction in knowing that I was taking control of my life, making my own decisions. My new independence more than made up for whatever familiar comforts I had lost.

Orientation passed and classes began. The workload felt easy compared to what I was taking previously. Some of my credits had transferred, so I was immediately able to take courses in my major – English. I was sincerely interested in learning and I made a couple of casual friendships with girls in my dorm. Life was...good. I even enjoyed living in weather in the summer was warm...sometimes hot...and it was light almost 24 hours a day. When winter arrived, there were seven long months of dark and cold. But, I surprisingly didn't mind it that much. I loved viewing the Northern Lights and the way the moon reflected off the snow.

Renee and Phil visited the first Christmas, but never returned. I stopped going on vacation with Charlie in the summer – it felt rather childish – but I remained in touch with both my parents through phone calls and emails. Renee always offered to fly me to Florida for a visit, but I objected that it was too expensive and she didn't try to overrule me. I missed my parents, but I was living my own life now.

After my freshman year, I rented a small cabin, close to public transportation and campus. It was a dry cabin, meaning that it had no plumbing, and that I had to go into town to get water, and use an outhouse as a bathroom. I imagined it was rather romantic to live in a cabin in the woods in Alaska. Young women, such as myself, rarely chose to live this way, but I wasn't high maintenance and didn't mind the inconvenience. When I arrived in Fairbanks, I began writing and knew I wouldn't seriously be able to continue this discipline if I lived amongst the distractions of dormitory life.

My workaholic tendencies didn't cease. I took the maximum number of classes allowed, worked part time at a bookstore in town, and during the evenings and weekends spent all my free time writing. I had a few friends, but otherwise I was alone.

I liked the solitude, but sometimes I _did_ worry about myself. Maybe I was too isolated, too content with myself. I never connected well with people, with my clumsiness and innate shyness, but this fierce independence sometimes felt _too _independent. Shouldn't I share my life with someone? I wasn't lonely, but sometimes it felt like something or _someone_ was missing...

Whenever these thoughts threatened to overwhelm me, I pushed them out of my head and focused on being busy. I was good at doing this.

Before I knew it, two years passed, and I was experiencing a senior year for the first time...in college. Due to transfer credits from community college, going to school full time, even in the summers, and taking the maximum number of courses each semester, I only had a few credits left to complete graduation requirements. I was taking an American Renaissance class three mornings a week and had an independent study project for Advanced Creative Writing. After a long discussion with my professor, and his approval after reading some of my writing, I was able to use the novel I had been working on for the last two years as my project. It gave me the motivation to finish it and was an easy six credits to earn towards my degree. I would have a Bachelor of Arts degree in English by May.

I hadn't meant to graduate from college in three years, but I was proud of myself for being so focused.

It was a _quite_ life in Alaska, but I was content. Mornings at school, afternoons and evenings at the bookstore, nights at home writing. This became my routine as my 20th birthday passed and I began my last winter in Alaska.

Is it really my last winter here? I thought, as I walked into Gulliver's Books late one morning, after class.

I didn't have any plans after graduation. Although I seemed to rush through high school and even college, I didn't feel the need to rush away from Fairbanks. It had become home for me. Maybe I would apply for graduate school? Dave would probably allow me to keep working at the store...maybe I could work and use my free time to continue writing? Writing was what truly made me happy, other than reading, of course.

"I'm such a nerd," I chuckled to myself, taking off my coat and wiping my boots on the mat.

When I moved to Fairbanks I began working part time at Gulliver's Books and as my academic load lightened, I transitioned to working full time hours. It was a small bookshop, but the staff was a tight knit group. Dave, the owner, Maria the general manager, Annie the office clerk and Sarah the cafe manager had become like family to me. They were all older – in their late 40s to mid 50s – and had taken me under their wing when I first arrived in town. I spent a lot time in the store during my first summer, sitting in the cafe and writing for hours in my journal, or memorizing the stacks of shelves. Eventually Dave offered me a job, "Since you spend so much time here, anyway," he explained. My coworkers respected my privacy, and I knew if I needed anything they would be there for me.

"What are you laughing at?" Dave asked, as I walked over to the counter to put on my name tag.

I shrugged and smiled. "Just thinking about how weird I am...more happy to read or write than talk to people."

"You're not weird, Bella," Dave admonished. "Most people talk too much anyway. You don't ramble on like others do."

"Like me?" Sarah called out, walking down the stairs from the cafe on the second floor. She smiled kindly. "Bella, today's lunch is vegetable soup and turkey panini. Come get it whenever you're hungry."

"Thanks, Sarah," I replied. They always made sure I ate lunch at work because they knew I often forgot to eat when I was doing schoolwork or writing.

"Good morning, Bella!" Maria greeted me warmly, walking in from the back office. "How are you?"

"I'm good," I responded politely. "How are you?"

"Oh, you know, experiencing the usual aches and pains of old age...I picked up a new shipment of books this morning at the post office and I think I pulled a muscle." She rubbed her lower back.

"I'm sorry. Can I do anything to help?" I asked.

She shook her head. "Dave was my hero...he brought all the boxes inside. Annie has scanned them all into the system, but, I do need _you_ to shelve them. When you're finished, check back in with me, okay?"

I smiled. "Sure, no problem." Shelving books was tedious work, but she let me listen to music while I worked. Tourist season was over and only locals would be visiting. Should be an easy day, I thought to myself.

As I walked to the back office to grab the cart of new books by Annie's desk, I looked back and saw Maria and Dave whispering to one another. Although they weren't married or even officially dating, everyone knew how in love they were with one another. It was cute.

I put headphones in my ears, choosing to listen to one of Renee's favorite classical pieces, and wondered, for a brief second, whether I would ever fall in love or not.

Probably _not_, I smiled wryly. I wasn't even sure if I was capable of loving someone in _that_ way. Eh. Definitely not. I was too independent.

The hours whiled away as I organized books and placed them on the correct shelves. Occasionally, I would pause to read the back cover of a book, if it looked interesting, but mostly I worked. It was until I felt my stomach rumble that I realized I had forgotten about lunch. It was time to take a break.

I took off my headphones and tucked them in my pocket, stretching my muscles, which were a bit stiff after hours of intense concentration. I closed my eyes and yawned.

When I opened my eyes, I noticed a man staring at me intently. In that brief second, when our eyes met, it was if time stood still. A shiver went down my spine and I blushed. Embarrassed, I looked down, covering my face with my hair, and turned to walk in the opposite direction.

As I made my way through the back office, taking the back staircase to the second floor cafe, I groaned. It had been too long since I had seen an attractive man. I didn't know how to react. I should have smiled, asked him if he needed help. Instead, I fled.

"So mature, Bella!" I muttered to myself, rolling my eyes. I stumbled through the kitchen.

"Sarah, I forgot to eat lunch. I'm sorry," I apologized. "Do you have anything left?"

"For you, of course. Relax for a minute and I'll bring it out to you."

"Thanks, you're the best," I replied with relief. My stomach was filled with butterflies and I was nervous and jittery. Was the man still downstairs in the bookstore? Did he think I was a complete moron?

I tried to calm down, pouring a glass of lemonaide and finding a seat at a table in the back corner of the cafe. Once seated, I put my arms on the table and lowered my head to rest on them. How could _one look_ get me so flustered? I definitely needed to get out more. This was ridiculous. No man had ever had this affect on me before.

Suddenly, I felt the presence of someone standing beside me. At first I thought it was Sarah, bringing me my food, but she couldn't have been _that _quick. Whoever it was smelled really, really good, intoxicating sweet, and the butterflies in my stomach doubled. Could it be the man I saw downstairs?

Slowly, I sat up, gathering the courage to raise my eyes. My heart was pounding. I was almost trembling, but it wasn't out of fear or anxiety. I was having a _physical_ reaction to this person standing near me.

When I looked up, I saw that it was_ him_ and I almost forgot to breathe. Gorgeous wouldn't begin to describe his god-like beauty. Dark eyes, bronze colored hair, perfect cheekbones, lips that begged to be kissed. He was looking at me intently, as if he was surprised at what he saw. In fact, he was almost _smiling _and that made me even more unnerved.

"Bella," he whispered. It wasn't a question. It was a statement. His eyes seemed be memorizing my face.

I swallowed, nervously. "Do I know you?" I asked. There was no way I would ever forget meeting _this_ guy, but it was the only thing I could think to say.

He shook his head softly and glanced down at my name tag. _Duh_, I thought, wanting to hide. I blushed again and he smiled fully this time. I waited for him to say something. I didn't know if my mouth could form any coherent sentences.

Our eyes locked and this time I wasn't able to break away. Instead of feeling flustered, I felt...transformed...as if nothing would ever be the same again. The butterflies in my stomach remained, but they were joined by a sense of _completeness_. It was as if I had been searching for this man my entire life and now that I had found him, I was whole. I felt relief...I...I _fainted_.

Darkness covered me as I collapsed.

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P.S. I love you. Please love me back with reviews.


	2. Chapter 2

When I awoke, I was surrounded by Sarah and a few cafe patrons, but the man was gone.

"Where did he go?" I yelped in panic.

"Who, dear?" Sarah asked.

I was shaking and felt a bit dizzy. "Um...no one...what happened?"

"It looks like you _fainted_. You can't keep forgetting to eat, Bella," she answered with kindness, but also a gentle rebuke.

I groaned. "I'm so embarrassed. Thank you everyone, for helping me," I mumbled, standing up, but almost instantly lost my step.

Sarah looked genuinely concerned. "Maybe you should see a doctor?" she suggested.

"No, I'm fine...I'm fine," I shook my head. "But, maybe I _do_ need to go home..."

It wasn't like me to take off from work early, but I suddenly felt completely exhausted, as if all energy had been drained from my body when this stranger locked eyes with me. I had know idea what just happened to me and I needed to figure it out. I needed to be alone.

"Yes, I'll help you downstairs," Sarah replied, agreeing with me.

She walked me to the door, explaining to Dave what happened. He insisted on driving me home, and Maria helped me put on my coat. It was uncomfortable to have them fawning over me, but I was too tired to protest.

"Bella, get some rest," Maria encouraged. "We'll see you Monday."

It was Friday. I wasn't scheduled to work Saturday and Sunday we were closed. I nodded my head.

"Thanks, Maria."

Dave drove me home in his truck and then made sure my water tanks were full and I had enough firewood. I was starting to be more embarrassed...my fainting must have _really_ scared them. It kind of scared me, too, I guess.

"I'll be fine, Dave," I insisted. "Thank you so much for your help."

"Call us if you need anything," he offered with a wave as he walked to his truck.

I closed the door and locked it, walked to my bedroom, still wearing my coat, scarf and gloves, and laid on the bed, almost immediately falling asleep. I dreamed of the man in the bookstore, the bronze haired god with dark eyes. We were holding hands and running through a meadow. "I love you, Bella," he whispered. "We will never be apart." He pulled me into his arms and as I looked into his eyes, I realized I never truly existed until I met him. I thought I would melt away by being loved so deeply. Suddenly, anxiety overcame me and I woke up gasping.

Shaking, I steadied my breathing to calm down. I screamed when I realized I was wearing a nightgown, instead of my clothes, and I was tucked _under_ the sheets, instead of sprawled out on top of them, stealing wearing my coat, scarf and gloves. I didn't remember changing or moving at all.

"Calm the fuck down, Bella," I muttered to myself. I rarely swore, but it seemed to be appropriate language since I was seriously losing. my. mind.

It was dark outside, but it was always dark during Alaskan winters. I glanced at my bedside clock. It was 5am. I had slept more than fifteen hours. Yikes. Maybe I really was sick?

I noticed it was warm in the cabin and that alarmed me. It should be cold. I glanced and noticed the space heater in my bedroom wasn't plugged into the socket. Scrambling, putting on my robe and house shoes, I walked cautiously into the living room, to see the glow of a fire in the fireplace.

Someone had started a fire?

I grabbed an iron poker from the fireplace and held it up defensively.

"Who the hell is here?" I demanded, cautiously walking around the cabin. It was small. There wasn't a lot of hiding places. "I _will _hurt you." My heart beat wildly. Could I really defend myself? I would _try_.

The living room and kitchen shared an open floor plan. I poked under the sofa, opened the closet, looked under my bed. There wasn't a bathroom, but there was a small room I used for showering. It was empty. Although I was gripped with fear, I searched the entire cabin and found no one. There were only a few windows and they were all locked and braced. The intruder would have had to break a window to enter the cabin that way. Obviously, he...or she...had entered through the locked front door. But, it showed no sign of forced entry. Creepy.

I moved as much furniture as I could – sofa, chairs, kitchen table - and stacked it against the door, barracading myself to safety. Once it felt secure, I went to the stove to boil myself a cup of tea. The kettle was warm and next to it was a cup and tea bag already prepared. I glanced around suspciously, completely freaked out.

Nevertheless, I poured the hot water into the mug and went to the refrigerator to add cream and sugar. I took my tea and sat down on the rug in front of the fire. Was someone watching me? Was someone trying to kill me? If they were, they were being extremely thoughtful about it - changing me into more comfortable clothes, tucking me into bed, preparing a fire and making tea. Who would do that?

I must have done all of this while sleep walking, I thought to myself. I had seen a documentary about it – people who do things while sleeping. I must have undressed myself, made a fire, then started boiling water before I went back to bed. That made more sense than a stranger breaking into my house to take care of me. I looked at the mountain of furniture against the door and rolled my eyes. Silly, Bella.

With the fear subsided, I thought of the man in the bookstore. I didn't even know his name. I didn't know if I would ever see him again. The thought made me feel incredibly sad and tears began streaming down my face.

"Ugh!" I exclaimed. "Seriously, Bella. You need to get it together. You're falling apart!"

Even though I spent a lot of time alone, I rarely talked to myself. I had an anxiety attack at work and I was sleep walking. _And_ I was irrationally crying over a stranger.

During freshman year orientation, I had been warned about the dangers of living in Alaska. With the constant darkness of winter, many people had seasonal affective disorder. My classmates even joked about people going "crazy" in Alaska. Maybe I had lived a solitary life for too long. Maybe it was catching up to me and I was having a mental breakdown. The last few years I had worked incredibly hard, without a break. Maybe this was my brain's way of telling me to calm down?

Maybe I hallucinated and the man in the bookstore didn't really exist? He was too gorgeous, too perfect. It made more sense for him to be a figment of my imagination than a real human being.

I finished my tea, then stretched out on the rug. Monday morning I was going to campus health clinic and asking for a referral to see a psychiatrist.

I needed help.


	3. Chapter 3

A few hours later, when I awoke, I felt refreshed. I laughed at myself for freaking out, but was still seriously going to ask for professional help.

I added a couple of logs to the fire and put the furniture back in place, rolling my eyes at how ridiculously I had reacted hours before. I didn't usually wear the nightgown I had on, it was strange that I had chosen it, so I changed into my normal uniform of sweats and a hoodie. I spent the rest of the day at home, doing homework, working on my novel, and watching a movie on television. The stranger from the bookstore invaded my thoughts constantly and I repeatedly told myself he was just a figment of my imagination.

_He's not real, he's not real,_ I thought silently.

I spent Sunday much like I did Saturday, except in the afternoon I went to the laundromat, followed by a trip to the grocery store. My hands were full by the time I stumbled off the bus to walk down the lane to my cabin. I always overestimated how much I could carry. I walked slowly, balancing the laundry in a sack on my back as my two hands carried the heavy grocery bags.

"Can we help you with that?" a voice asked in the darkness.

I screamed in surprise and dropped my bags.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you," the voice apologized. I looked and saw that it belonged to a small woman with short black hair. "Hi, I'm Alice," she greeted, sticking out her gloved hand. "This is my brother Emmett."

I glanced up at the man. He was _huge_. I stopped myself from saying "Woah" out loud. I had never seen either of them before and I knew everyone who lived in my neighborhood. There wasn't a car in sight, so it seemed like they were walking...like me.

"Um, hello," I replied, not shaking Alice's hand, but bending down to pick up my bags. "I'm Bella. Are you new in town?"

"Please let me help you with that," Emmett offered, taking the bags from me, holding all of them with one hand, as if they weighed nothing. With his other hand, he took the laundry bag off my back.

It was so unlike me to allow others to help, I was independent and could do everything on my own, but Alice and Emmett seemed eager to help me.

"Thanks," I mumbled, suddenly feeling shy.

Alice smiled at Emmett. "Yes, our family just moved here from Forks, Washington."

I gasped. "Forks? My father lives in Forks!"

"Really?" Alice mirrored my gasp, with equal surprise.

"He's the chief of police...I used to visit as a child, but I haven't been back in years."

"Charlie Swan, right?" Emmett asked.

"Yes!" I never expected to meet someone in Fairbanks who ever heard of Forks, much less lived there and knew my father. I wondered if Emmett knew Charlie because he had arrested. His body looked dangerous, but the smile on his face and glint in his eye made him seem like a lovable teddy bear.

"He was a friend of our father. Carlisle, our _adopted_ father, is a doctor and worked at the hospital," Emmett explained.

They were adopted? That was interesting. "I'll have to tell Char...my dad...that I met you. What's your last name?"

"Cullen," Alice answered, excitement in her eyes. "Please tell Charlie we said hello."

"I will," I smiled, suddenly feeling comfortable in Emmett and Alice's presence. Usually, I was awkward when meeting new people, but I felt like I had known them my entire life even though it had only been a few minutes.

"We were just going for a walk," Emmett explained. "Can we walk you to your cabin?"

Suddenly, I was suspicious. "How do you know I live in a cabin?"

Alice shrugged. "There are only cabins on this street. They're really cute, but goodness they look small!"

I blushed, feeling stupid for being suspicious. One minute I trusted them, the next second I was on edge.

"Sorry...I haven't been feeling well. Thanks for the help, I do appreciate it. My cabin is just down the way."

Both Alice and Emmett looked concerned. "Are you sick, Bella?" Alice asked. "We could take you to see Carlisle. He's a _great_ doctor."

I shook my head and started to led them down the lane. "No, I'm fine. I actually was already planning to go to the health clinic tomorrow."

Alice and Emmett continued to look worried and for a second I almost thought Alice was sniffing, trying to smell me.

"I'm a student at UAF, although I'll be graduating soon. If you have any questions or want a tour around campus, I'd be happy to help," I offered, wanting to distract the attention away from me, and assuming they were college students. They looked too mature to be in high school and too elegant to be seasonal workers.

Alice clapped her hands, as if my offer was the most exciting thing she had ever heard.

"We would _love_ a tour...wouldn't we Emmett?" He nodded. "Rosalie, Jasper and _Edward_ would love it, too."

"Wow, you have a big family," I remarked, taking out my key as we neared the cabin. "I'm an only child."

"We're very close," Alice replied. "I can't wait for you to meet them!"

I smiled tentatively, as I reached out to Emmett for my bags. Alice was speaking to me as if we were already close friends. I didn't mind her familiarity, but it was kind of..._weird_.

"What's your phone number?" Alice demanded, pulling out her cell phone.

They were strangers, but I didn't feel threatened by them. After all, they already knew where I lived and seemed to know Charlie. I didn't have to exhaust myself walking home with so much to carry and it was nice to talk to people my age for once. Maybe Alice and Emmett would be my new friends?

I gave her my number and she entered it into her phone. "I'm sending you a text message, so you have my number. I'll call you soon."

"Thanks for helping me. It was really nice to meet you." I spoke sincerely.

"It was nice to meet _you_, Bella," Emmett replied. "Let's go Alice, I'm sure Mom and Dad are waiting for us."

Alice threw her arms around me and gave me a hug. "Bella, we're going to be such good friends!" she exclaimed.

I didn't know how to respond and Emmett laughed. "Excuse my sister, she comes on too strong sometimes."

"It's okay." I gave a small smile and waved as they walked away. "Bye."

"Bye, Bella. See you soon!" Alice almost sang. She skipped off into the darkness, Emmett following her.

Emmett was right. Alice did push her friendship on me a little strongly, but it felt completely sincere. It felt nice that someone was excited to be my friend, even though I wasn't sure what the motivation was. Maybe she was lonely, like me? _Was_ I lonely? I never allowed myself to think about it, but Alice's offer of friendship made me realize how much time I spent alone. Being alone didn't necessarily equal loneliness, but when was the last time I had done something other than work? I couldn't remember.

Monday morning I called Maria and told her that I was going to see a doctor after class and that I would be late to work. She was happy that I was getting my "sickness" checked out and told me to come in whenever I could. I didn't mention that I wasn't going to a _physician_ kind of doctor. I was going to a _psychiatrist_ kind of doctor. It would be too embarrassing and she would ask too many questions. My private life was private.

Class went by quickly and I immediately walked across campus, making my way to the student health clinic. Even though I lived in Fairbanks for more than two years, it was still peculiar to me for it to be dark in the middle of the day. But, that was Alaskan winter. I looked out at the horizon, thinking that _somewhere_ the sun was shining, just not here.

Since I wasn't paying attention, I slipped on an icy patch and began to tumble backwards, only to be caught my two strong arms.

"Thank you!" I gasped. "I'm so clumsy..." I turned around to see who had steadied me. The person's hands remained holding my arms.

It was _him_. The stranger from the bookstore! He smiled hesitantly, as my eyes widened in shock. My eyes rolled back and I felt darkness covering me.

I fainted. _Again._


	4. Chapter 4

I was no longer outside in the cold. I was sitting on someone's lap and he was holding me in his arms. I didn't want to open my eyes. I was going to die of embarrassment.

"Bella?" the stranger's voice asked softly. "Are you awake?"

Damn. How did he know? I opened my eyes and his face was only inches from mine. My heart started to beat wildly. I felt an impulsive urge to kiss this stranger. I had never been kissed before, but suddenly I couldn't think of a rational reason why our lips should not be pressed together.

"Uh..." I mumbled, shaking my head. _Snap out of it, Bella. _The stranger still had his arms around me and I didn't want to leave his embrace, but when I realized we were sitting in the middle of the student center, the positioning didn't seem so appropriate. He was a stranger, after all.

I stumbled out of his lap, and almost fell face first on the floor, before he steadied me to sit next to him. Our bodies still touched, sitting side by side. He took my hand into his.

"You're still dizzy. Perhaps you should see a doctor."

I shivered at the sound of his voice. It felt like he was caressing my soul when he talked.

_Damn it, since when did I think like this?_ I berated myself, finally snapping out of my haze.

So, the stranger was real. Maybe I didn't need to see a psychiatrist after all. I didn't need to see a _physician_ either. I never fainted in my entire life, but I faint twice – both times when I saw this stranger. Definitely connected. Why did he have this affect on me? It was so embarrassing.

"I'm fine. Thank you for your help."

"You're welcome."

We sat in silence, not looking at each other directly. Sitting side by side, it felt like electricity sparking between us where our bodies touched. Neither of us moved.

Eventually, the stranger was the first to speak.

"My name is Edward Cullen."

The stranger had a name.

_Edward Cullen_...where had I heard that name before?

"Cullen? Are you..." I turned to face him and he mirrored my actions.

"Yes, Emmett and Alice are my brother and sister. They told me they met you yesterday."

How did he know I was Bella _Swan_? My name tag at the bookstore said my first name, but not my last. Surely there was more than one Bella in Fairbanks. Seeing the suspicion in my eyes, Edward answered my question before I had to ask it.

"I went to the bookstore Saturday, hoping to see you again. When you weren't there, I asked around until someone told me your last name. I wanted to look up your phone number, so I could call you, but you were unlisted. When Alice and Emmett returned home Sunday, they told me they met Charlie Swan's daughter, Bella."

"Why would you want to call me?" I asked, shyly.

Edward looked surprised. "You fainted at the cafe. I wanted to check and see how you were doing."

"But, you left. Why didn't you wait until I woke up? Would've been easier..."

"I'm sorry, I had to talk to someone. Please forgive me." He held my hand and squeezed it gently, looking deeply into my eyes. "It won't happen again."

I shivered. I was seriously going to faint for a third time if this stranger...if _Edward._..was going to keep looking at me this way. Although it pained me to do so, I withdrew my hand from his and stood up.

"Well, I'm fine," I managed to squeak out awkwardly. "I need to be going now. Goodbye."

I grabbed my backpack off the floor and began to walk away.

"Where are you going?" Edward asked, chasing after me.

"I have to go to work," I answered, avoiding his eyes.

"Can I give you a ride?"

Despite the fact my body screamed for him to touch me, he was still a stranger and I was the daughter of a police officer.

"Sorry, I don't accept rides from strangers," I answered politely.

"I'm a _stranger_?" he replied, hurt evident in his tone of voice.

I stopped walking, surprised that he was so hurt by my words. I smiled, trying to soften his pain.

"Edward, I just met you," I explained. He seemed happy to be looking into my eyes again.

"Ah...I understand. Can I walk with you?"

He looked so hopeful, I couldn't refuse him. "Um, it's a free country," I replied lamely. Ugh, was I in 6th grade again? Edward laughed, as if I intentionally was trying to tell a joke. Was he mocking me?

I expected Edward to talk to me as we walked, but he didn't. I noticed that he stood as near to me as he could, without touching me. I was tempted to "accidentally" bump into him, but I restrained myself. I didn't understand the yearning I felt to touch him.

Gulliver's was right off campus and it didn't take very long to reach it.

"See you later," I mumbled, with an awkward wave, as I entered the store. To my surprise, Edward followed me inside. I ignored him and took off my coat, hanging it up and putting on my name tag.

The store was empty and I went to the back to let Maria know I arrived. She asked about my health, but then remarked I looked so much better than on Friday. I shrugged and asked her what she wanted me to do today. I was assigned to skim the aisles and straighten the books, then man the cash register. Usually Dave liked to be up front to talk with customers, but he was on a trip to Anchorage. Maria looked a little sad, as if she missed him already. Even though it was cute, I wanted to roll my eyes. She reminded me of Renee and Phil. _Love sick._

I was still very aware of Edward's presence in the store, but acted like I didn't notice him. I wanted to have _some _self respect. So far, he must think I'm the girl who faints at his feet every time she looks at him. A man like Edward must have hundreds of girls vying for his attention. I wasn't going to follow the crowd...I did my own thing. I was independent.

"What are you doing?" a voice interrupted my thoughts. _Edward._

"Working," I replied, stating the obvious. I continued to walk down the aisles, scanning the racks to see if any books were out of place.

"Can I help?" he asked.

I stopped and turned around to face him. "What are _you_ doing?" I asked, straightforwardly. I wasn't used to getting this much attention from anyone, especially someone as god-like as Edward.

Edward was surprised, as if I should know exactly what he was doing. He looked down, and then directly into my eyes.

"I just want to be near you," he replied, his face full of vulnerability.

My heart rate increased, butterflies fluttered in my stomach. Edward leaned in closer to me, our foreheads almost touching.

"I don't want to be a _stranger,_" he whispered, using the word I used earlier to describe him. I was dangerously close to fainting again..._or _ravishing him with kisses.

He pulled back, was suddenly six feet away, with a book in his hand. How did he move so fast?

"Bella, I'm going run a few errands," Maria called out, turning into the aisle where I was standing. "Annie's in the back and Sarah is upstairs if you needed anything. Okay, hon?"

I blinked. "Um, okay. Thanks."

She looked at me cautiously, then seemed to dismiss her thoughts. "Be back soon."

By the time I heard the ring of the bell, signaling her exit from the store, Edward was in front of me again, leaning in. I jumped back in shock.

"Woah," I yelped. "How did you move so _fast_?"

Edward's eyes widened. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to frighten you."

"It's okay..." I mumbled, reminding myself to breathe. I could not faint again...

The bell at the door rang, signaling new customers entering the store. I went to the front to greet them, resisting the urge to look back at Edward. What was happening between us? What did he mean when he said he didn't want us to be strangers? Was he hitting on me? Impossible!

As the morning progressed, Edward didn't try to talk to me again, but he didn't leave, either. He sat in one of the overstuffed chairs and read a book. At one point, it looked like he was texting someone and I felt irrationally jealous, wondering who it could be. Of course, I was watching him, when I had a free moment and thought he wasn't looking. It was hard to take my eyes off him, actually. He didn't seem to be watching me, though, and I felt a bit disappointed by that and relieved at the same time.

When it was time for my break, I took the back staircase to the cafe to eat my 'free for employees' meal. I chose a garden salad and iced tea, my stomach was still too anxious for anything heavier, and went to my favorite seat in the back corner. On the way there, I picked up the local paper, from the front counter, and began to look through it while I ate. I wasn't reading it. I was trying to look busy, as I wondered if Edward was still downstairs.

"May I join you?" a voice asked. _Edward._ Always Edward interrupting my thoughts of _Edward_.

I nodded, too nervous to speak, and he sat down across from me.

"How do you like Fairbanks?" we asked each other at exactly the same time. We both laughed.

"Sorry, you first," I insisted.

"I'm happy to be here," he answered simply. "And you?"

"I really like it here. It's so different from where I grew up, but it suits me. I like the peace and quiet."

"Where did you grow up?"

"Phoenix. Warm, hot, sunny, desert of a place. Where are you from?" I was anxious to know anything and everything about this man.

Edward seemed to consider his words before answering. "I was born in Chicago. My family just moved here from Forks, but you already know that."

I smiled as I nodded, delighted that we had something in common. "Such a small world. You know, I considered finishing high school in Forks, but decided to graduate a year early in Phoenix, instead. I think we might have been classmates, if I had chosen to live with my dad. But, we meet here in Fairbanks. How crazy is that?"

"We were destined to meet," Edward replied with confidence.

I blushed and immediately felt hot and bothered. No man had ever affected me this way.

"Please eat," he urged, pointing to my plate. "Even if it's just a salad, you need your strength."

"I _like _salad," I replied, kind of offended that he was picking on my choice of food. I took a big bite and he smiled at me.

"Aren't you hungry?" I asked.

He shrugged. "I'm fine. So, tell me more about graduating from high school early. Why did you decide to do that?"

Edward looked at me as if I was the most fascinating person in the world. It was hard not to open up to him. Within minutes, I was telling him my life story. He was so easy to talk to – knowing when to listen and when to ask a clarifying question. Before I realized it, Sarah came over to let us know she was closing the cafe for the day.

I jumped up and looked at my watch. I had completely forgotten about work. Edward and I had been talking for two hours? It felt like two minutes.

"I have to get back to work!" I gasped, picking up my tray and heading towards the kitchen. Not wanting to be rude, I turned back to Edward.

"It was nice to talk to you," I told him, with all honestly. I was uncertain whether he would want to talk to me again. "See you around," I added and disappeared in the back.

Sarah followed me into the kitchen. "Bella! You just broke that poor guy's heart. You should've seen his face. "_See you around_"? She laughed and swatted me with a hand towel. "Girl, you play hard to get!"

I blushed. "I'm not trying to play hard to get," I protested. "I just spent two hours monopolizing the conversation. He was probably relieved that I stopped talking."

"I've never seen you talk so much, Bella," Sarah observed. "Is he an old friend?"

"No, I just met him today," I responded immediately.

Her eyes widened. "Hmm..Maybe someone is in love?" she said with a smile.

I rolled my eyes and groaned. "Whatever! I've gotta go...Maria is going to kill me."

I bolted down the back staircase and as soon as I reached the first floor, I felt like I collided into a wall, except it was...Edward.

"What are you...?" I muttered.

He eyes looked troubled. "Who is going to kill you?" he asked, grabbing me by the shoulders.

"Uh...what? You _heard_ that?"

His facial expression was deadly serious. I shook my head.

"Edward, it's a figure of speech. My boss is going to be _upset_ with me. That's all I meant."

He calmed down, perhaps realizing how irrational and _weird _he was being.

"Please don't talk like that," Edward pleaded. "If someone tried to hurt you..." he didn't finish his sentence.

I was shocked. What had possessed this man? Why was he being so intense about me? Was he for real?

Not knowing how to respond, I was thankful that Maria interrupted us, even if it meant getting in trouble.

"Bella, are you alright?" she asked. "Who is your friend?" Maria didn't seem mad, she seemed curious. In the years she had known me, she had never met any of my friends...mostly because I didn't have many.

"This is Edward. I was just showing him where I worked. Edward, this is the general manager, Maria."

I hated lying to her, but how else could I explain why he was in a space only employees were allowed.

"It's nice to meet you," Edward greeted, sticking out it hand to shake Maria's. It reminded me of how Alice greeted me, so polite and formal, as if they were from a different era when manners actually mattered.

Maria smiled. "Nice to meet you, Edward." She glanced at me and her eyes twinkled. Now she had her explanation of who I spent my extended lunch break with. I wasn't in trouble, she was happy for me. She sat down at her desk, returning to her work.

"Let me show you to the door, Edward," I mumbled, grabbing his arm and leading him out of the office. When I touched him, I felt that electric spark again, but I didn't let go.

We stopped walking when we reached the front door of the store.

"Well...I have to work now..." I awkwardly explained. He just stared at me. Why wasn't he asking for my phone number? Because Alice had it? Would she give it to him? Would he call me?

"Okay," he replied.

"Okay," I repeated, disappointed he wasn't asking to see me again. "Goodbye..."

I turned and walked to the counter, sitting down on a stool. I looked up and Edward was still standing at the door. Wasn't he going to leave? He walked over to me, a nervous expression on his face.

"I'm sorry, but I can't say goodbye to you."

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_Thanks for reading! Please review!_


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N**:Thank you to everyone who has supported this story by reading, reviewing, adding as a favorite and putting it on alert! You are awesome! (FYI: Gulliver's Bookstore is a real store in Fairbanks!)

As you requested, (and **gredelina1 **inspired me) this chapter is from Edward's POV. It was difficult for me to write, but I hope you like it! Part 2 of EPOV will be coming next. As always, I credit Stephenie Meyer. She owns Twilight, not me. Also, in this chapter, I used lines from New Moon.

Please review and let me know what you think. Thanks for reading!

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**EPOV**

My life was like a moonless night, but it wasn't all bad. There were stars, points of light and reason. My adoptive parents and my brothers and sisters were an encouragement to me. I was lucky to have them in my life. I enjoyed learning new languages and skills, music was my passion and I spent hours playing the piano. Yet it was still a very dark existence, never changing, always the same. Immortality was a gift in that you were allowed to live forever...but it was also a curse because life could be as boring as hell sometimes.

Our family had recently moved to Fairbanks from Forks. Every few decades we took a "sabbatical" year when we were tired of school and wanted to take a break from the human charade...and _temptation_. Fairbanks was a good fit for us. It was near our Denali cousins, had an abundance of wildlife and Carlisle could still work in a hospital. The darkness of winter, in addition to the isolation, allowed us to keep an even lower profile than we normally did.

We weren't planning on staying here very long. Soon we would move to another small town, I would enroll in high school (again), then go to college (again) and the process would repeat itself. Maintaining a permanent residence for six to eight years was better than the alternative – a nomadic lifestyle – but the monotonous routine was never ending. Apart from these rare "sabbaticals," I expected to live this way for eternity. Such was the life for an immortal, vegetarian vampire.

It was yet another day, not much different from any other. Carlisle was at the hospital, Esme was in her study, designing plans for our next house, Rosalie and Emmett were in the garage, Jasper and Alice were researching something on the computer, and I was in my bedroom reading.

As I read, I tried to block out the thoughts of my family members, to respect their privacy, especially since the couples were feeling romantic towards one another this morning. I felt the lust rolling off Jasper in waves and Alice's response to him. Rosalie and Emmett were _always _hot for one another, even after seventy years together. Esme may have been by herself, but Carlisle was always on her mind, even more so when they were apart, and she began to think of him in a rather obscene way.

I groaned, shut my book, put on my coat and left the house. Being the only single man in a family of three perfectly matched sets of lovers was a challenge. I may not be human, but I was still a man. The lust was affecting me as well, except I had no one to share it with. Instead of torturing myself with experiences I would never have, I took my car and drove into town.

Personally, I was always content with myself...never feeling the desire to have a mate of my own. It didn't happen for all vampires...it was unusual that our family mated so quickly and easily. Being alone didn't bother me that much. I accepted it as my destiny in life. To some degree I could satisfy my own physical needs, but I knew it was unlikely I would ever experience the intimacy and obsession that I observed between the couples in my family. Even though I had witnessed Carlisle find his mate in Esme, and Rosalie rescue Emmett from death, and the profound changes that occurred in all of them, in some regard, vampire mating was a mystery to me and I fully expected it to remain that way. But, even if I didn't seek or desire it for myself, I didn't want it thrown in my face, either.

I had been meaning to check out the only independent bookstore in town, not expecting to find anything worthwhile, but thought it would perhaps occupy my time until it was safe for me to return home.

My stomach churned as I entered the store. The scent hit me like a ton of bricks. It was a _human_ scent and I was surprised that it didn't make my mouth pool with venom. I was definitely attracted to it, but in a way I had never experienced before. Compelled, I followed the scent and it led me to a young woman with long, mahogany hair, listening to music while shelving books, so engrossed with her work she didn't notice me. I stood frozen in shock. Time stood still.

The intensity of the connection I felt with this woman was too strong for words to describe.

Since I literally could _not _move, my instincts demanded a plan for survival. Normally, I would choose either fight or flight. But, as I looked at this woman, I didn't want to do either of those things. I only wanted to _surrender_.

In that moment, I knew. This woman was _mine._

Suddenly it made sense why I never considered being with another women, human or vampire, even though they were constantly offering themselves to me. I had been waiting for _her_.

The woman stopped working, closed her eyes and yawned. She glanced in my direction and for a brief moment our eyes met. It was instantaneous and immediate. I knew I would love this woman forever.

Color filled her cheeks and she covered her face with her hair and then walked away.

Why was she walking _away_ from me, instead of towards me? It felt so unnatural. Mine. Mine. Mine. Where was she going?

I followed after her and saw her disappear into a back room, then heard the sound of footsteps on a staircase. She was going to the second floor cafe. Trying not to draw attention to myself, I went up the public staircase.

The woman was sitting at a back table, her head was down and she seemed to be shaking. Was she unwell?

I walked slowly, to stand beside her, marveling at the precious gift of her existence, wondering how I ever managed to live a day without her. She raised her head and looked at me. Did she feel our connection as well? What was she thinking? I realized I couldn't read her thoughts. How odd.

Her name tag revealed her name and I spoke it out loud. "Bella," I whispered, cherishing the name of the person my entire world now revolved around. It was as if she was completely familiar to me. I knew her body and soul.

"Do I know you?" she asked.

Did she feel it too? We had never met, but it was as though I had known her forever. I shook my head, not being able to speak because I was overcome with emotion. I read her name tag again – _Bella_. She blushed and I was unable to contain the joy filling my being and I smiled.

We stared at one another and I knew my life would never be the same again. I was complete.

_So this is what it feels like_, I thought to myself. I observed the devotion Carlisle felt for Esme, as well as the others for their mates, but it seemed fuzzy and inadequate compared to the obsession I now felt for Bella. I wanted to possess her and I wanted her to possess me.

My animalistic impulses began to emerge. Physically, I craved her. I needed to touch her. I need to consume her.

I needed to talk to Carlisle.

Bella was _human_. Of course, I knew this from the moment I saw her, but the reality of it set in. She was fragile. I could hurt her. Carlisle would help me understand these new urges and emotions invading my system.

Suddenly, Bella's eyes rolled back and she fainted.

My first instinct was to protect her, gather her in my arms, escape from the bookstore and claim her as mine. But, that would cause too much attention and perhaps frighten Bella.

I caught her and placed her on the floor, kissing her forehead. I would stay with her until she recovered. I would stay with her forever.

My cell phone buzzed and as I checked it I recognized a text message from Alice.

_Go to Carlisle now. He's leaving on a hunting trip with Esme and you won't be able to talk to him until next week. She'll be fine. Go now!_

It felt unnatural to leave Bella, but I absolutely had to talk to Carlisle.

"I will return, my love," I whispered and then disappeared.

As soon as she left my sight, I began to hurt. As vampire, I very rarely ever felt any sort of physical pain. I didn't understand why I was reacting this way. Further proof that I needed to talk to Carlisle.

I rushed to the hospital and every passing moment away from Bella's presence, the pain increased. It felt as though my bones were being slowly crushed. As I stumbled into Carlisle's office, he was waiting for me, his thoughts full of concern.

_Alice called and told me you were coming. What's the matter, son? _

I managed to smile. "I met my mate, Carlisle," I whispered. If I could have cried, I would have. My body was trembling with emotion.

Carlisle's face lit up with disbelief and a smile that matched my own. He crossed the room to give me a hug.

"Congratulations, son! I knew this day would come. I'm so happy for you!"

He stepped back and sniffed the air. "Where is she? Certainly, she must be close by. Why did you come alone?"

I collapsed in a chair and put my head in my hands. "It's complicated. She's a _human_."

Carlisle gasped. "A _human_? Oh, Edward..."

"How does this work? Will I hurt her? Will she love me back? I'm feeling instincts and desires I've never felt before...it's almost too much to bear."

"Have you spoken with her?" he asked.

"I tried to, but I could only say her name. I was too overwhelmed. Then, she fainted." I grinned, hoping that fainting was a good sign. At least I had some affect on her, even if it was not as strong as the affect she had on me.

Carlisle thought for a moment, then began to explain. "Mating is mutual. I don't think it makes a difference that she is human. It's a supernatural occurrence. Undoubtedly, she felt the connection as well, but as a human she'll process it differently than our kind do. For you it's instantaneous, for her...it might take time to understand what she's feeling."

"What should I do?" I pleaded.

He smiled. "Introduce yourself, get to know her. Since she's human, it will require more patience on your part, but you've always had amazing self control. _Enjoy_ this is experience, Edward. It's wonderful."

Carlisle made it seem so easy. I had more questions, needed more reassurance, but I needed to return to Bella.

"It hurts to be away from her," I admitted.

He nodded in understanding. "It's instinctual to want to be with your mate, especially in the beginning stages when bonding occurs. You must remember how I refused to be separated from Esme, but every couple is different, some are more intense than others."

I groaned, a sharp pain shooting through my body unexpectedly.

"Go to her son," Carlisle advised, with a smile. "Call me if you need anything."

I nodded as I stood up and walked towards the door. Carlisle's thoughts were buzzing. He was proud of me, thrilled I had met my match.

_I cannot wait to meet my new daughter_, he thought with delight, as I left his office.

Panic overcame me. I was a vampire. Bella was a human. I was immortal, she was not. One day she would die and I could not live without her. Would I change her into one of us? CouldI do such a thing? Would she even want to join my world? I could not think of these things now.

I was going to listen to my father. I was going to enjoy this experience.

I was no longer alone!


	6. Chapter 6

A/N: Thank you for reading! This is the second part of Edward's POV...it is the longest chapter I've ever published...hope you enjoy it!

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I immediately returned to the bookstore, rehearsing my introduction on the way there.

"_Hello, I'm Edward Cullen. I love you."_

"_Hello, Bella. My name is Edward Cullen. You are mine for eternity."_

I could recite poetry and then kiss her. I could pretend to need help locating a book and then ask her to marry me. Damn. I had no idea what to say without it ending in a major declaration of feelings and intentions. I was also too intense for my own good. I didn't want to intimidate or overwhelm my mate.

And I was nervous. I felt vulnerable. No one else in the world had the power to hurt or reject me like Bella did. How would she react to my love?

I entered the bookstore, wiping my feet on the mat and trying very desperately to look nonchalant. My eyes scanned the front desk and shelves, I sniffed the air for her scent, but she was no where to be found. I tuned in to the thoughts of the humans in the store – Dave, Sarah, Maria...a few customers – and searched for information. They were all worried for Bella. Dave drove her home and had just returned. I focused on Dave's thoughts – he was thinking of how he filled Bella's water tanks and gathered firewood for her. He hoped he had done enough. He was a good man and had nothing but fatherly affection for my Bella. I would reward him later for his kindness.

I casually walked by the register, scanning documents, hoping for a glimpse of Bella's last name. I didn't know what it was, but I needed to know. Soon. I feared I would collapse in a faint, just as Bella had done earlier, if I didn't see her immediately, and I needed to find out where she lived.

My cell phone buzzed. It was a text message from Alice again.

_Bella Swan. 237 Gold Hill Road. _

_Thank you, _ I replied. Her talent, as well as Jasper's computer hacking skills, always got our family the information we needed.

_Don't be too intense or you'll scare her._

I rolled my eyes. I loved my sister, but sometimes she was too bossy.

The next text message was directions to Bella's house. Alice may be bossy, but she was also definitely helpful.

I drove to Bella's address, but parked my car down the street and walked through the woods instead. I was too nervous to talk. I was just going to observe her, let my emotions settle, then decide what to do from there. It was dark and I would not be detected. There were a few cabins on Bella's street, but they were scattered and far between. Her small cabin was isolated, several yards from the main road. It seemed unusual for a young woman like her to choose to live in such a place – so alone and so vulnerable to attack.

I gasped. Bella _did_ live alone, right? It never occurred to me that she may have a partner. I repressed a growl. If there _was_ a man in Bella's cabin, he _would_ be destroyed. There would be no competition. She was _mine_.

As I neared, I detected Bella's scent, but there were no lights on in the cabin. Her heartbeat and breathing seemed to indicate she was asleep. She was alone. I waited for an hour, to see if she stirred, but she did not. My pain had been relieved a bit, but I still yearned to see her face. I could easily slip into her house, undetected, and make sure she was safe. Then, I would leave and wait for morning and introduce myself properly.

I turned off my phone, as not to be interrupted by Alice or other family members. I knew Esme would be eager to meet Bella. It was her greatest desire that I find a mate.

The front door of the cabin was locked, but I picked the lock and opened the door without damaging it.

The cabin had a two levels - a main floor and a loft over head. On the wall by the front door was a stove, sink and cabinets overhead, with a refrigerator on the adjacent wall, and a small table. Past the stairs leading to the loft, was the living room. The walls were lined with shelves, overflowing with books, there was a large stone fireplace, a well worn sofa and chair, coffee table, and desk with a computer that faced a window.

The place was simple, but I loved it immediately. It was overwhelmed with Bella's scent.

As quietly as I could, I walked up the stairs to the loft. My love was sprawled across the bed face down, still wearing her boots and parka. Being near enough to touch her brought peace to my being, but I longed to see her beautiful face. Very carefully, I reached out and turned her over. She remained asleep, but moaned in pleasure at my touch.

Seeing how I pleased her, I realized I couldn't anonymously observe. I had to take care of her.

I returned downstairs and started a fire. The cabin was cold and Bella needed to be warmed. Back by her side, I very carefully removed her shoes and coat. She was still wearing her clothes and I debated the pros and cons of undressing her without her permission. I was her mate, she would forgive me, but I would also try to be a gentleman.

I went to her dresser and picked out a nightgown. I wasn't sure what she wore to bed, but the one in my hands looked comfortable. She was wearing many layers, and I slowly removed her sweater and unbuttoned and slid off her jeans, interpreting the Star Spangled Banner into Arabic, as to not allow myself to become too aroused by her shape. Reminding myself to be gentleman, I closed my eyes and touched only her undershirt and long johns, and not her body, as I removed them and replaced it with her nightgown.

For a moment, I had to step back and catch my breath. I wasn't tempted by her blood at all, but I was tempted by her body. The animal in me urged me to claim what was mine, despite the fact that my love was deeply asleep. I could only imagine the horror and violation she would feel if she awoke to me mounting her.

When my arousal was under control, it would never _completely_ pass, everything about Bella was inciting to me, I tucked her under the covers and kissed her forehead. For the remainder of the evening, I sat by her bed, watching her sleep. It was truly fascinating. When dawn approached, I went downstairs to turn on the kettle, guessing that she'd like a cup of tea later on in the morning. As I added another log to the fire, I heard her gasp. She was awake!

With vampire speed, I escaped through the front door, locking it as I closed it silently. I stood on the porch, listening for what would come next.

"Calm the fuck down, Bella," she told herself. I laughed at her candor. There were footsteps and then her heartbeat increased dramatically.

"Who the hell is here? I _will _hurt you," she called out.

Now it was time for me to use foul language. FUCK! I had taken too many liberties – undressing her, tucking her into bed, starting a fire...of course she would notice and be suspicious.

I heard the movement of furniture slam against the front door and I couldn't help but laugh. She was barricading herself. How cute. There was silence for a moment, then I heard water being poured. I was right, she did like tea! Then further silence and then sobbing. It sounded like Bella was crying. How I wished I could hear her thoughts, but I couldn't.

"Ugh! Seriously, Bella. You need to get it together. You're falling apart!"

I was filled with remorse. My desire to take care of her had overcome my common sense and hurt her in the process. Instead of making her feel loved, I made her feel frightened.

When Bella finished crying, she seemed to fall asleep. A few hours later, when she awoke, she laughed, and I was relieved that she felt better. I moved from the porch, to the trees surrounding the one window in her living room. Although I wasn't near enough to touch her, I felt considerably calmed in seeing her face. I watched as she moved her furniture back into place, then waited until she returned, with her hair in a pony tail and a change of clothes. She sat at her desk for hours, which gave me a clear view of her face. Sometimes she looked out the window and I wondered if she knew I was watching her. I wondered if she was thinking of me, as I was obsessing over her.

Bella did not leave her house at all on Saturday, and I remained outside, guarding, protecting, wanting her, waiting for her. In the evening, when she fell asleep, my desire to be near her overcame rational thought, and I broke into her cabin, again, and went to her bedside to watch her sleep. The next morning, I left before she awoke, but remained outside, in the trees, listening to her movements.

I was mesmerized and completely enamored, definitely in my own world. By the time I noticed their scents, Emmett and Alice were by my side.

"You know, you could turn on your phone once in awhile," Alice complained.

My eyes didn't leave Bella's cabin. "Sorry, I was busy."

_I saw what you did, Edward, undressing Bella! Are you crazy?_ _You haven't even talked to her yet!_

I turned to look at Alice. "I was a _gentleman_," I insisted.

"What do you mean _gentleman_? What did you do Edward?" Emmett asked. _Did you make a move already? Way to go..._

"Forget about it," I mumbled, returning my eyes to the cabin. Bella hadn't been near the window in a few hours, but I knew she was awake. "What are you two doing here?" I asked.

"We came to meet our new sister," Alice announced. "What are you waiting for? Let's go introduce ourselves!"

"No," I replied firmly. "We're not going to overwhelm her, okay? I need to take things slowly. She's human. She's fragile."

Emmett rolled his eyes. "You don't have to ask her to _marry_ you, bro. Just say _hello_."

I heard the door of the cabin open. Bella was leaving!

Emmett and Alice followed me as I followed Bella. She was carrying a large sack and began walking down the lane.

"Where is she going?" I asked Alice, who immediately scanned the future.

"The laundromat...and then grocery store. When she returns home, she'll need help carrying everything."

Like a love sick puppy, I continued to follow Bella and watched her get on a bus. I growled when she went out of my sight.

"Grumpy, much?" Emmett remarked. "Let's take your car into town to watch her."

Immediately I began to run and Alice and Emmet followed. We jumped into the car and sped into town. Alice gave me directions to where Bella was headed and I parked in front of the laundromat. It had a wall of glass and I would be able to watch her in clear view.

A few moments later, Bella walked directly in front of my car. She was listening to music and oblivious to my presence. I gripped a handle, resisting the urge to rip off the door and wrap Bella in my arms. The need to touch her was overwhelming.

"Not a good idea," Alice advised, seeing my decision. "She'll run away screaming..."

I changed my mind. I would have to be content with watching her from a distance. I rested my chin on the steering wheel and smiled as Bella loaded her clothes into a washing machine, then sat on a bench and read a book.

I sort of expected Emmett to make a joke or Alice to insist again that we speak with Bella, but they didn't say anything. They were watching _me_ as I watched Bella, their thoughts kind and slightly amused at seeing their brother in love.

_Rosalie always thought Edward was gay, but he's not. Amazing._

_Edward is so different...so at peace...so happy._

When Bella finished her laundry and stopped by the grocery store, I became more bold and decided to follow her inside. Emmett and Alice joined me, giggling, their thoughts evolving from kindness to teasing.

_You know, technically you're stalking your mate. Just talk to her already!_

_Are you shy? I've never seen you act this way before, Edward! _

Emmett began to suggest pick up lines.

_"I don't care *how* many items you've got, baby, I could check you out all day long!"_

"_Are we in the laxatives aisle? 'Cause the thought of hooking up with you is running though my mind like crazy."_

"_I've got some meat here that's 'Best if used by tonight.''_

_"Baby, you better get out of that express lane, 'cause you're all that *and* a bag of chips." _

Eventually, my brother made me laugh, and as I did, he put his arm around shoulders and gave them a squeeze.

"Welcome to the club, bro."

We followed Bella home, and as she struggled with her packages, I nodded to Alice, giving her permission to meet Bella. She clapped in delight and she and Emmett offered their help.

"Can we help you with that?"

Bella screamed and dropped her bags. I almost attacked Emmett and Alice for scaring her.

_Don't panic, Edward. She was just surprised._

"Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you. Hi, I'm Alice. This is my brother Emmett."

"Um, hello," she replied. "I'm Bella. Are you new in town?"

"Please let me help you with that," Emmett offered. _ I'll take care of your woman, bro._

I growled loud enough for Emmett to hear me, but not Bella.

_Dude, I didn't mean like that. Relax. This is my new sister! _

"Thanks," Bella replied shyly.

"Sorry," I whispered, knowing Emmett's vampire hearing would pick it up. "I couldn't help my reaction."

_It's cool. I understand._

"Yes, our family just moved here from Forks, Washington."

"Forks? My father lives in Forks!"

"Really?" Alice responded. _Did you know about this Edward?_

"He's the chief of police...I used to visit as a child, but I haven't been back in years."

"Charlie Swan, right?" Emmett asked.

"Yes!"

"He was a friend of our father. Carlisle, our _adopted_ father, is a doctor and worked at the hospital," Emmett explained.

"I'll have to tell Char...my dad...that I met you. What's your last name?"

"Cullen," Alice answered, excitement in her eyes. "Please tell Charlie we said hello."

_Can you believe Bella's father is from Forks? All these years we've known the father of your mate. Amazing!_

"I will," Bella replied.

"We were just going for a walk. Can we walk you to your cabin?"

"How do you know I live in a cabin?" Bella was very perceptive, but Alice was good at lying and being evasive, as we all were in our family.

"There are only cabins on this street. They're really cute, but goodness they look small!"

"Sorry...I haven't been feeling well. Thanks for the help, I do appreciate it. My cabin is just down the way."

Was Bella sick? Emmett and Alice mirrored my concern.

"Are you sick, Bella?" Alice asked. "We could take you to see Carlisle. He's a _great_ doctor."

Carlisle was in the wilderness of Denali. He wouldn't be located easily, but we could find him. I would do whatever it took to keep Bella healthy and safe.

"No, I'm fine. I actually was already planning to go to the health clinic tomorrow."

_She doesn't smell sick_, Alice thought, sniffing the air. _Maybe she's just tired. Humans go to doctors for all sorts of reasons._

"I'm a student at UAF, although I'll be graduating soon. If you have any questions or want a tour around campus, I'd be happy to help," Bella offered.

Most humans instinctively distanced themselves from our kind, but Bella was responding with openness and kindness. It was remarkable.

Alice clapped her hands. "We would _love_ a tour...wouldn't we Emmett?" He nodded. "Rosalie, Jasper and _Edward_ would love it, too."

"Wow, you have a big family. I'm an only child."

"We're very close," Alice replied. "I can't wait for you to meet them!"

_She'll meet Jasper tomorrow! Oh, we're going to be best friends. I'm so excited._

"What's your phone number?" Alice asked, pulling out her cell phone.

Bella gave Alice her number, which I memorized instantly, of course.

"I'm sending you a text message, so you have my number. I'll call you soon."

"Thanks for helping me. It was really nice to meet you."

"It was nice to meet _you_, Bella," Emmett replied. "Let's go Alice, I'm sure Mom and Dad are waiting for us."

_And by Mom and Dad, I mean __**Edward**__._

Alice hugged Bella. "Bella, we're going to be such good friends!" she exclaimed.

Emmett laughed. "Excuse my sister, she comes on too strong sometimes."

"It's okay. Bye."

"Bye, Bella. See you soon!" Alice called out. She and Emmett met me in the woods.

"We _love_ her!" Emmett exclaimed, mocking Alice's excited tone of voice. _Seriously, we do,_ he added.

"She wasn't afraid of us at all! There was even a possibility that she would have invited us in to her cabin, but I didn't pursue it because it would drive you crazy that _we_ got to be near her and not you..."

Alice was sincerely excited, already making plans in her head with Bella – slumber parties, shopping, girl talk.

"Thank you for helping her. First thing in the morning, I'm going to introduce myself, I promise."

It pleased me that Alice and Emmett liked Bella and that Bella had responded so openly to them.

"Can I ask a personal question?" Emmett asked. I nodded. He was always straightforward and I liked that about him.

"Don't take this the wrong way...I don't mean anything by it, but I was wondering – are you tempted by her blood? She _is _human." Emmett was careful in guarding his thoughts, not betraying how tempted he was by Bella's scent, but I knew his throat burned in thirst. Mine did as well.

I shrugged. "I don't fully understand it. I'm very aware of her blood, I'm not tempted by it. I don't think I'm capable of hurting her...although..."

Alice had seen it, but I confessed to Emmett how I had frightened Bella with my acts of service, like undressing her. He laughed at my boldness.

"Maybe the mate bond supersede my bloodlust? I don't know. I'm still going to be careful around her. Even if I don't drain her, with my strength in one mistake I could break her."

Alice paused, searching the future. "You won't hurt her," she replied confidently.

I smiled. "Thanks." I still didn't completely trust myself, though.

We chatted a few more minutes, and they left me alone, to continue watching Bella's cabin from the woods. Again, when nighttime fell and Bella went to bed, I went to her side to watch her sleep. Being with her made me truly happy. I didn't know this level of contentment was possible. She was my world.

When Bella awoke, I waited outside again, and as she left the house, I followed her to the UAF campus. The ninety minutes she spent inside her class, in a room with no windows, forcing me to wait in the student center. was pure torture. I had to watch her through the thoughts of her classmates, but it wasn't a satisfying view. While I waited, I glared at every human who attempted to look at me. I was not in a good mood.

Finally, class was over and I leapt out of my seat to meet Bella in the quad. I decided that I would simply walk up and introduce myself to her. The one thing I knew we shared in common was Forks, and I would lead with that. From there...I would see what happened. And I would find a way to remain by her side.

Nervously, I walked behind her. I yearned to hold her in my arms, and my more animalistic urges wanted me to pin her to the ground and make love to her. I did neither. Suddenly, she began to slip on the ice and I reached out to catch her fall.

"Thank you! I'm so clumsy..."

I could not take my hands off her. She turned around. I tried to smile, but her eyes widened in shock. She collapsed in my arms, fainting again.

Carlisle told me that humans would react differently to mating than vampires. Bella seemed to not be able to handle the intensity. It made me worried for her. I scooped her up in my arms, despite curious glances, and returned to the student center. I sat on a sofa in the lounge and placed her in my lap.

I liked her sitting there, so close to me. It seemed the perfect place for her to be. A couple minutes passed and I felt her heartbeat increase.

"Bella?"I asked. "Are you awake?"

"Uh..." she mumbled, stumbling out of my lap. I had to pull her back before she hit the floor head first, and I held her hand in mine. She didn't pull away.

"You're still dizzy. Perhaps you should see a doctor."

"I'm fine. Thank you for your help."

"You're welcome."

I was puzzled at Bella's behavior. I depended heavily on reading the thoughts of others, so I felt uncertain about how to respond since her mind was closed to me. Sitting side by side, it felt like electricity sparking between us where our bodies touched. She wasn't leaving. I took that as a good sign.

"My name is Edward Cullen," I finally said, breaking the silence.

"Cullen? Are you..." she turned to face me and I copied her actions. She pulled her hand away from mine.

"Yes, Emmett and Alice are my brother and sister. They told me they met you yesterday."

She looked suspicious and I was caught off guard. I awkwardly explained, my years of lying and deceit suddenly vanishing from my mind, as I made up an excuse about how I knew her last name. I hoped it was convincing.

"I went to the bookstore Saturday, hoping to see you again. When you weren't there, I asked around until someone told me your last name. I wanted to look up your phone number, so I could call you, but you were unlisted. When Alice and Emmett returned home Sunday, they told me they met Charlie Swan's daughter, Bella."

"Why would you want to call me?" she asked, shyly.

I was surprised. Couldn't she feel how I desired her? "You fainted at the cafe. I wanted to check and see how you were doing."

"But, you left. Why didn't you wait until I woke up? Would've been easier..."

Bella wasn't satisfied with my lame excuse.

"I'm sorry, I had to talk to someone. Please forgive me." I held her hand and squeezed it gently, looking deeply into her eyes. "It won't happen again."

She shivered, probably due to the nearness of my ice cold body, and withdrew her hand from mine, for a second time. I missed her touch immediately.

"Well, I'm fine," she responded. "I need to be going now. Goodbye."

She began to walk away and I chased after her.

"Where are you going?"

"I have to go to work," she answered, avoiding my eyes. Had I done something wrong?

"Can I give you a ride?"

"Sorry, I don't accept rides from strangers," she answered politely.

"I'm a _stranger_?" I replied, deeply hurt at that label. Bella was so familiar to me...she was my other half. How could she not feel that, too?

She stopped walking and looked at me with concern.

"Edward, I just met you," she explained. Her kindness brightened my spirit. And she was looking at me again!

"Ah...I understand. Can I walk with you?" I wasn't going to take no for an answer.

"Um, it's a free country," she replied and I couldn't help but laugh.

I searched my mind for conversation ideas, but my thoughts were clouded with desire. I stood as closely to her as I could, but kept myself from touching her again. The bookstore was close to campus and we reached it too soon.

"See you later," she dismissed me and walked into the store. I followed. I watched as she took off her coat, put on her name tag and went to the back office to talk to her boss Maria. It seemed like Bella was trying to ignore me, as she started walking down the aisles, straightening books.

"What are you doing?" I asked.

"Working," she replied.

"Can I help?"

Yes, this was my attempt to flirt.

She stopped walking and turned to face me. "What are _you_ doing?" she asked.

"I just want to be near you," I replied, feeling incredibly vulnerable, not knowing what I would do if she rejected me.

I heard her heart rate increase and I leaned in closer.

"I don't want to be a _stranger,_" I whispered. I would no longer be restrained. I was going to kiss her.

Suddenly, I heard Maria's thoughts. She was coming to talk to Bella. I pulled back, grabbed a book, and pretended to read.

"Bella, I'm going run a few errands. Annie's in the back and Sarah is upstairs if you needed anything. Okay, hon?"

Bella stood, a little dazed, my behavior not going unnoticed. "Um, okay. Thanks."

_What's wrong with Bella? Ah, she's a good girl..._"Be back soon."

I returned to my previous position, but I was too quick.

"Woah. How did you move so _fast_?"

Was there anything Bella didn't notice? "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to frighten you."

"It's okay..." she mumbled.

The bell at the door rang, signaling new customers entering the store. Bella left me and I counted to ten, using my years of practice of self control to keep from following her. I needed to take things slowly. I felt too comfortable around Bella...I would scare her if I didn't take my time.

I didn't leave, however. I grabbed a book and pretended to read, all the while watching Bella from the corner of my eye and through the thoughts of her customers.

When I heard her taking the back staircase, I followed her to the cafe on the second floor. I allowed her time to sit down and then I went to her. She was reading a paper.

"May I join you?"

She nodded and I sat down.

"How do you like Fairbanks?" we asked each other at exactly the same time. We both laughed.

"Sorry, you first," she insisted.

"I'm happy to be here," I answered honestly. Happy to be here with _her_. "And you?"

"I really like it here. It's so different from where I grew up, but it suits me. I like the peace and quiet."

"Where did you grow up?"

"Phoenix. Warm, hot, sunny, desert of a place. Where are you from?"

I didn't want to lie to her. "I was born in Chicago. My family just moved here from Forks, but you already know that."

She smiled at me for the first time since I'd met her and it was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. "Such a small world. You know, I considered finishing high school in Forks, but decided to graduate a year early in Phoenix, instead. I think we might have been classmates, if I had chosen to live with my dad. But, we meet here in Fairbanks. How crazy is that?"

"We were destined to meet," I replied. She blushed and I was aroused.

"Please eat," I urged, trying to distract myself by remembering her needs. "Even if it's just a salad, you need your strength."

"I _like _salad," she replied, taking a big bite. I smiled. She was feisty. I liked that.

"Aren't you hungry?" she asked.

Bella noticed everything. I need to think of an excuse about my suspicious habits. "I'm fine. So, tell me more about graduating from high school early. Why did you decide to do that?"

Bella was the most fascinating person in the world to me. As we talked, I learned more about her life and personality – she was extremely intelligent, a hard worker, independent. I could listen to her for days and never be bored. As we talked, it was as if the world faded away. It was just the two of us and no one else. Unfortunately, Sarah, the cafe manager, broke the spell, telling us she was closing the shop.

"I have to get back to work!" Bella gasped, picking up her tray and heading towards the kitchen. Suddenly, we weren't in our own little world anymore and Bella was back to acting indifferent about me.

"It was nice to talk to you. See you around."

My mouth dropped open in shock. That was _it_? See you around?

Sarah teased Bella, her thoughts revealing that her open and talkative behavior with me was unusual. I took that as an encouragement. She teased Bella about being in love and Bella responded with saying Maria was going to kill her.

It happened in a split second – my entire being tensed and I began to shake in anger at the mere mention of Bella being threatened. I raced to the back staircase to protect Bella and find out who her enemy was...and destroy them immediately.

"What are you...?"

"Who is going to kill you?" I asked, grabbing her by the shoulders.

"Uh...what? You _heard_ that? Edward, it's a figure of speech. My boss is going to be _upset_ with me. That's all I meant."

My vampire brain was able to process several pieces of information at once. I quickly realized my animalistic tendencies had overcome rational thought for a moment. My reaction frightened me. Bella was using a figure of speech...what if she actually was in danger? I would kill to protect her in a split second, without any regard for the consequences. Pain ripped through me, as I considered Bella being in danger.

"Please don't talk like that," I pleaded. "If someone tried to hurt you..." I would kill them. But, I couldn't tell Bella that. She might not react well.

Maria, Bella's boss entered the room. "Bella, are you alright?" she asked. "Who is your friend?" The woman was impressed with my good looks and excited to see Bella with a male companion.

"This is Edward. I was just showing him where I worked. Edward, this is the general manager, Maria."

"It's nice to meet you," I greeted.

"Nice to meet you, Edward." She looked at Bella. _Aww...Bella has a boyfriend. So cute. It explains where she disappeared to this afternoon. Ah...young love. _Maria's thoughts moved to Dave and their intimate moments.

"Let me show you to the door, Edward," Bella insisted, initiating touch with me for the first time. I instantly relaxed.

"Well...I have to work now..." she explained.

"Okay," I replied. I wasn't going to leave her. I would wait.

"Okay," she echoed, seeming to wait for me to say something else, but I wasn't sure what. "Goodbye..."

_See you around _had been cruel. _Goodbye_ was blasphemous. I never wanted to hear her say that word to me and I never wanted to say that word to her.

"I'm sorry, but I can't say goodbye to you," I responded.

Bella Swan was my mate. I was not going to leave her. 


	7. Chapter 7

"Is something wrong?" I asked.

Edward shook his head. "No, nothing is wrong. It's just that...as I said before...I want to be near you."

My stomach flipped over, a blush spreading across my face. I was embarrassed at my reaction, but delighted at his words. His phone buzzed and he quickly looked at it.

"Alice wants to visit the store, do you mind if I wait for her?"

I shook my head, reminding myself to breathe. Edward smiled.

"I'll be in the music section," he whispered, walking backwards, holding my gaze, then turning around gracefully and disappearing behind the stacks.

Who was this man? Why was he having this affect on me? Why did he want to be near me?

I glanced in the direction of the music section, but couldn't spot Edward from where I was sitting. I didn't dare go to him. Maria had been far too kind in not reprimanding me for taking a two hour lunch break, especially when my usual break was only thirty minutes. I had been a faithful employee, rarely having a sick day, always on time. I liked my job and wanted to keep it. I didn't want my bosses to think I was suddenly becoming a flake because I met a man. That was too much like Renee and I was _not_ her.

My body stiffened, realizing where my thoughts had led. Where did _that _come from? Too many questions, too many new feelings. I was spiraling.

Suddenly, I felt instantly calm. The worry vanished and I felt at peace. _Everything will be okay_, I told myself. J_ust enjoy the moment for once_.

The bell on the door jingled and Alice came skipping through the doorway. "Bella!" she exclaimed. "It's so good to see you again!"

It was hard to not be cheered by her excitement for life. "Hi, Alice," I replied shyly. "It's good to see you, too."

Alice met me at the counter, leaning in to whisper. "My brother really likes you! What do you think of _him_?"

"Um..." He told her about me? I felt ridiculous for even saying this. "Is he _stalking_ me?"

It's not that I would mind being stalked by someone like Edward Cullen, but he was just really, very... _intense_.

She laughed, as if it was the funniest thing she heard all year. "I warned him to not be too intense, but he wouldn't listen. He's quite captivated with you."

"Intense is a good word to describe Edward. Is he like this with all the girls he's interested in?"

I felt like I was making a bold assumption in claiming that he was _interested _in me. Maybe he wasn't interested in me _romantically_, but he certainly was giving me a lot of attention. I didn't know how to handle it.

Alice stopped laughing and was suddenly serious. "No, Bella. He's not. I've known Edward for many years and he's never reacted to anyone the way he's reacting to you."

I swallowed nervously. "Oh," I replied.

"He's never ma...had a _girlfriend_ before," she added, correcting what she was originally going to say.

Okay, now _that_ was unbelievable. I rolled my eyes and sighed. Gorgeous, god-like Edward had never had a girlfriend? Impossible.

I looked at Alice skeptically. "You're telling me that Edward has never dated before? He's perfection. I'm sure he could have any woman he wanted."

She smiled mischievously. "You think my brother is _perfection_?"

I blushed. "Obviously, he is very good looking. You're beautiful, too. So is Emmett. I just can't believe Edward has always been single."

"It's true, he does have his share of admirers wherever we move, but no one has ever caught his attention like you have. Our family thought he would be alone forever and that's why we're so happy he's found _you_. Carlisle and our mother Esme can't wait to meet you!"

I gasped. "Your parents know about me? I just met Edward a few hours ago!"

"You met him on Friday," she corrected me.

"We didn't speak until today!"

Alice looked uncomfortable, as if she revealed too much. I was beginning to feel very overwhelmed.

"Um..." Alice murmured. I doubted she was ever at a loss for words, until now.

The bell rang and a tall, strikingly handsome blonde man walked in and put his arm around Alice's waist. He kissed her on the cheek and she snuggled closer to him. Instantly, I felt relaxed.

"Bella, this is Jasper."

"Good afternoon, ma'am," he greeted, politely, with a hint of a Southern accent.

"Hi," I replied.

"Darlin', Esme wanted you to pick up a few architecture books for her. Shall we look together?"

Alice smiled at me as she allowed Jasper to lead her behind the stacks.

"Section 8A," I called out, remembering I was still working.

I closed my eyes, rubbing my temples, although I didn't have a headache. I felt calmed again and wondered if my constantly changing emotions would give me whiplash.

The calm remained long enough for me to focus on filling out order forms for a list of customers who had requested books, and check out a few who were buying books. Occasionally, Alice would saunter over, asking for my opinion on a book or two. Edward reappeared, sitting in the same chair he had in the morning, reading another book. I expected Edward, Alice and Jasper to eventually become bored and leave the store, but to my surprise they remained until the store closed.

Maria joined me at the counter at the same time the Cullens came to purchase the books they had chosen. Maria's eyes widened as she saw the mountain of books. She wasn't a greedy person, but I knew she would be happy at the small fortune the store would earn from this sale.

"Our family loves to read," Edward explained to Maria. "Our father, Dr. Cullen, has an extensive library and is always looking for new books to add to his collection."

"Well, that's nice," Maria replied. People in Fairbanks were down to earth, not rich or fancy, and anyone who looked at the Cullens could tell they did not belong here. The locals appreciated the tourists who spent their money in town, but they weren't impressed by it. But, Edward had a charming way of speaking...it was almost dazzling. Everything about him was impressive, even to an older, experienced woman like Maria, and especially to me.

"Please come again, soon," she added, as the Cullens picked up their bags.

"Bella, would you like a ride home?" Alice asked, her eyes hopeful.

"I have to close up the store, but thanks anyway," I replied instantly, wanting to show Maria I was serious about my job.

"Bella, it's snowing. You'll get home sooner if you don't have to take the bus. I'll lock up," Maria insisted.

"Are you sure?" I asked, uncertainly.

"Shoo, girl. I'll see you tomorrow."

"Um, okay...thanks Maria." I took off my name tag, put on my coat and picked up my backpack.

Alice linked her arm with mine, and walked me out of the store, followed by Jasper and Edward. The men were so tall, it felt like they were our body guards.

Earlier in the day I turned down a ride from Edward because he was a stranger. But, now I was freely getting into a car with him, Alice and Jasper. I hoped he didn't notice my hypocrisy. It had been a long day, it was cold outside, and I wanted to go home.

He seemed happy, though, as he opened the passenger door for me. Jasper and Alice slipped in the backseat. Edward drove. I realized this must be Edward's car.

"Nice car," I remarked. I didn't know what kind it was, but it looked expensive and fast.

"Thank you," he responded. "Rosalie tuned it this week for me..." he reeved the engine

Rosalie? Who was that? I felt silly for being jealous, but I was.

"Rosalie is Emmett's wife," Jasper explained from the backseat.

I nodded in acknowledgement. "Oh."

"Edward, would you mind taking me and Jasper home before you drop off Bella? I promised Esme I would help her with dinner. I don't want her to have to do it alone."

Out of the corner of my eye, I could have sworn I saw Edward look back and glare at Alice, but it happened too quickly. He was calmly looking at the road.

"Alice, sister dear, Bella has had a long day. She wants to go home. Esme can wait."

"Bella, you don't mind, do you?" Alice put her hand on my shoulder and gave it a squeeze. She looked so sad, as if I could grant her a wish that would ease all her sorrows. I had a feeling she always got what she wanted.

"Sure, I don't mind," I answered, granting her request.

Edward looked apologetic. "I know you don't feel comfortable being alone with me, we're still strangers, as you said earlier today. I'll drop you off, first, don't worry."

So he _did _remember. I regretted my words. As I looked at him, I realized I felt safe. I didn't know him as well as I would like, but he wasn't a stranger anymore.

"It's okay, Edward. I really don't mind," I assured him. Maybe being alone with Edward was what I needed. Maybe I would start to understand what was happening to me.

Edward glanced in the rear view mirror. I looked over my shoulder and caught Jasper nodding.

"Yay!" Alice exclaimed. "You can meet Esme and Carlisle..."

"Uh..." I almost began to panic, but was quickly calmed.

Jasper laughed. "Take it slow, darlin'. I know you're excited to be Bella's friend, but she can meet the family later."

Alice sighed. "You're right, Jazz. Sorry, Bella."

I felt relieved. "I'd love to meet them, Alice. I'm just a bit tired tonight."

"We understand," Jasper assured me.

Edward glanced over at me, a shy smile on his face. I couldn't help but smile back at him. He was adorable when he looked uncertain and vulnerable.

The Cullens lived on their own private estate, many miles outside of town. It was definitely going out of our way to drop Alice and Jasper off first, and as soon as I realized how far we were driving, I realized Alice had planned it this way to give Edward a chance to be alone with me. I would thank her later.

After driving down a mile long driveway, the house came into view. It was more of a _chalet_ or a mountain lodge and opulent luxury compared to the small, dry cabin where I lived. Edward drove around the circular drive, and as promised, I didn't have to go inside. Alice and Jasper said goodbye, gathered their new books from the trunk, then walked into the house.

As Edward drove back down the driveway, he held my hand in his, bringing it to his lips for a kiss.

"We're finally alone," he whispered.


	8. Chapter 8

"We're finally alone," Edward whispered, bringing my hand to his lips for a kiss.

His cold lips on my skin sent a shiver down my spine. My stomach was filled with butterflies and the normal electricity between us remained, but I wasn't nervous. I felt _safe _with him. I felt _complete_.

I smiled, but didn't say anything. Edward's eyes returned to the road, but he remained holding my hand, gently massaging my palm with his thumb. The sensation of his touch made me tremble with pleasure. I didn't know hand holding could feel obscene, but it it did.

I leaned back in the seat and closed my eyes, trying to understand what I was feeling.

During the day with Edward I felt a wide range of emotions, but now that it was just the two of us, alone, I felt more what I felt when we locked eyes in the cafe, right before I fainted. I felt like I had always known Edward, that all these years I had been waiting for him to arrive, and now that he had, I felt a deep sense of relief.

I never thought I would _need_ anyone. I was always self-sufficient. Usually after hours at work or spending time with acquaintances from school, I was itching to be alone. But, I had spent almost all day with Edward and as we neared my cabin, saying goodbye to him made me anxious.

If I asked him to come inside, would he expect something to happen? I never had a boyfriend before, never even kissed a man. Although Alice claimed Edward was just as inexperienced as I was, he definitely _looked_ worldly and experienced. For a brief moment, I wondered if this was this some elaborate family seduction to allow Edward take advantage of me? It was, it was definitely working.

I glanced at Edward and he looked just as nervous and uncertain as I did. I was going to take the risk.

"Would you like to come in?" I asked.

Edward's face lit up, as if he was relieved. "Yes!" he replied, eagerly. He exited the car, running around to open the passenger's side door for me. Such a gentleman, I noted.

We entered the cabin and I turned on the light. My little place felt inferior compared to the mansion he lived in, but Edward seemed fascinated by the cabin.

"Would you mind if I made a fire?" he asked.

"Please, make yourself at home."

Instead of using the logs by the fireplace, he stepped on to the porch and gathered a dozen or so from the reserve pile.

"You're strong," I remarked, impressed that he was able to carry so much. Thanks to his help, I wouldn't have to move more logs inside until next week. In one simple gesture, he saved me from a lot of work. Edward smiled at my compliment.

As he began to set the fireplace, I decided to take the moment to go to the bathroom.

"I'll be right back," I mentioned, turning to go outside.

"Where are you going?" he asked, alarmed.

"Um...I'm going to the bathroom."

"Outside?" he asked, incredulously.

"This is a dry cabin. I have an outhouse."

I wasn't embarrassed by it. A lot of people in Fairbanks lived in dry cabins, with outhouses.

"I'll go with you," he offered.

I shook my head. "I do this all the time. I'll be fine."

"But, it's dark outside. There could be wild animals."

I shrugged. "Like I said, I do this all the time. I've never been eaten by a bear. At least not yet."

Edward jumped up and rushed to my side. "Why do you joke about your life like that? It's precious to me."

He seemed to have a talent of making me speechless. The look on his face was pure concern and I didn't understand why my life meant so much to him.

"It's this way," I mumbled, walking out of the house. Edward closed the door behind him.

"You're not coming _inside _the outhouse," I warned. "It's not big enough for two people and...I need privacy."

If Edward Cullen wanted to see me tinkle, he was not the man for me.

He laughed. "Of course, Bella, don't be silly. I'll wait outside."

I glared at him and closed the outhouse door. If allowed myself to think about it, this was really, very embarrassing.

When I finished, I walked back into the cabin, refusing to look at Edward. He followed in silence. Once inside, he continued to make a fire, and I washed my hands, and put the kettle on to make a cup of tea. The cabin soon became warm, thanks to the fire, and I took off my coat, hanging it up.

"Can I take your coat?" I asked.

"Thanks," Edward replied, slipping out of his rather thin military style jacket. I was surprised it kept him warm in this harsh Alaskan winter. Our fingers touched as he handed me his jacket and there was a spark of electricity. He smiled and I blushed.

The kettle shrieked and I made a cup of tea for both of us, not knowing whether he would accept it or not, but he did. We sat down on opposite ends of the sofa, which was placed in front of the fireplace. The power flickered and it went out, leaving us to sit in the glow of the fire. It was an incredibly romantic setting, except for the seemingly enormous space between us.

"Does the electricity go out often?" Edward asked.

"Sometimes...but the community generator usually kicks in right away."

As if on cue, the lights came on again. We both smiled.

"Why do you live here? Alice told me you're a student at UAF. Why don't you live in the dorm?"

I frowned, feeling like I needed to defend my home. "It's not the nicest place, I know, but I like the privacy."

"You like to be alone," Edward stated. It wasn't a question.

With him, here with me, I suddenly didn't want to be alone anymore.

"Usually, I do," I replied honestly. "And you?"

He nodded. "I spend a great amount of time alone. You see, in my family, I am the odd man out. We have three perfectly matched sets of couples...and _me_."

"Carlisle and Esme...Jasper and Alice...Emmett and Rosalie..." I called out his family members, to see if I remembered their names.

Edward smiled. "Yes. I love my family...I am very lucky to have them in my life...but, sometimes it is lonely being the only single person."

He spoke as though he'd spent centuries alone, but he looked as if he were my age or a couple of years older.

"Wasn't there someone in Forks you were interested in?" I asked. Even though Alice told me he had never had a girlfriend, it was still very hard to believe.

He shook his head. "I've been waiting to meet the right woman. I didn't think I'd ever find her...until I met you."

As we were talking, we had shifted closer to one another on the sofa. We were now only inches apart. I drank my tea, nervously.

"May I kiss you?" he asked.

I nodded shyly, wondering if I would faint for a third time, and impressed at his boldness. Edward sat his tea on the coffee table. He took mine, and placed it as the table as well. Inching even closer, he cupped my face with his hands, and slowly leaned in until his lips met mine. We both felt that familiar electric spark that happened whenever we touched, but instead of jumping apart, we pulled each other closer. It was like a flame had been ignited. He put his arm around my waist and I ran my fingers through his hair, both of us eager and wanting more. My heart began to beat wildly, as Edward pressed me down on the sofa, covering my face with gentle kisses, whispering how beautiful I was.

This was _too_ perfect. Edward was too perfect. Maybe I really was hallucinating. I began to cry.

Edward stopped kissing me, but didn't move away. He wiped my tears away with his hand.

"Am I hurting you?" he asked, concerned.

"No," I whimpered.

"Then, why are you crying, love?"

"Because this can't be real. You're too perfect. I'm afraid I'll wake up in the morning and you'll be gone and I'll be alone again," the words rushed out. I felt incredibly vulnerable, sharing my heart like this.

"Oh, darling," Edward whispered in response. He leaned back against the sofa, placing me in his lap, cuddling me in his arms. "Bella, I'm _never_ going to leave you."

I was confused. "What do you mean?"

He stroked my cheek. "How can I explain it? Do you believe in love at first sight?"

"No," I answered honestly. "That only happens in movies...not in real life."

Edward leaned down to kiss me again. It sent shivers of pleasure down my spine.

"It happened to _me_, with _you_," he whispered, his lips a fraction from mine. He kissed me again and I eagerly responded.

For several minutes, I was in a daze of passion, as Edward and I enjoyed each other. His kisses were always gentle, full of care and concern, as if he was worshiping me when his lips touched my skin. Instinctively, I attempted to open his mouth with my tongue. He moaned and I felt his body tremble, but he didn't allow it, choosing to move his mouth to kiss my neck. My breathing increased as I began to feel a desire I had never known before. It was powerful. I _wanted_ Edward.

However, I wasn't ready to go from my first kiss to making love in one evening.

I carefully pushed him back, but laid my head against his chest so he wouldn't see my breaking apart from him as rejection. I needed to slow things down. Edward embraced me with one arm, and with the other, used his hands to massage my neck. It was exactly what I needed to relax.

"You are my first kiss," I confessed, slightly embarrassed at my inexperience. Even if he had never had an official girlfriend before, he was obviously a very experienced kisser. And he definitely knew how to use his hands.

"You're my first kiss, too," he responded. I laughed and looked up at him.

"What?" he asked, a small trace of hurt on his face. "Did you not like it?"

"Seriously, Edward? You are far too good at kissing for this to be your first time."

He smiled, understanding why I laughed. "I'm telling you the absolute truth. You are the first woman I've ever kissed. And it was definitely worth waiting for."

I felt honored _and_ unworthy. "Why did you choose _me_?" Why should _I_ be so lucky to receive the affections of this perfect man?

Edward looked me in the eyes, his face filled with confusion, as if I should already know the answer to my question.

"Because I _love_ you. The first moment I saw you, I knew that you were _mine_."

"How can you love me?" I protested. "You barely know me." I wanted it to be true, but it seemed too good to be true.

"For people like me, this is how it happens. It's instantaneous and irreversible. It's forever."

"People like _you_?" I questioned. What did he mean by that?

"I'll explain one day, but for now I think we need to get you to bed."

Edward was so good at distracting me. He lifted me up as if I weighed no more than a feather, and carried me in his arms to bed. I didn't know what he expected and I didn't think I would be able refuse anything he wanted, but I had to muster the courage to tell him I needed to take things slowly.

"Edward, I've never...and I..."

I was too embarrassed to talk, afraid to make assumptions, but not wanting to reject him either.

"Love, I am a gentleman. I want you to _sleep_...that's all," he spoke gently, rescuing me.

"Oh, okay. Are you leaving?" I asked, suddenly panicked.

"No, I'm staying here."

"Good," I sighed in relief.

He handed me my nightgown, which was laying on a chair. It was the same one I woke up wearing on Saturday morning, the one I _never_ wore. "Would you like to change for bed?"

I blushed. Did he expect me to change in front of him? It was an incredibly sexy _and_ scary thought.

Edward smile. "I'll close my eyes and turn around. I promise I won't peek."

I didn't understand why he couldn't go into the living room while I changed, but I didn't want him to leave my side, either.

He kept his promise and was a complete gentleman. I quickly changed and scooted under the covers.

"I'm finished," I announced and he turned around, and joined me in bed, but stayed above the covers.

I inched over and nestled my back against his chest. He wrapped his arm around my waist, drawing me closer. Our spooning felt very intimate, although the blanket was a barrier from our bodies fully touching. Edward kissed my neck and I shivered.

"Sweet dreams, my love," he whispered and I fell fast asleep in his embrace.


	9. Chapter 9

"Did you sleep well?" I asked, sitting up in bed, wiping my eyes. Edward was sitting next to me with a smile of contentment on his face.

"I don't really sleep," he admitted. "But, watching you is _fascinating_." He greeted me with a kiss on the cheek, and while I was delighted at his touch, I hoped he hadn't smelled my morning breath.

I noticed Edward had changed clothes. "Did you leave?" I asked, feeling distressed at the idea.

"No, I had a change of clothes in my car," he explained, understanding why I asked.

"Oh, that's good," I replied. It was silly for me to be upset that he left me for a moment. At one point we were going to have to be apart...we couldn't be together 24 hours a day, even if I wanted us to be. I had school and a job...and I was sure he had things to do.

"Can I make you breakfast?" he asked, his eyes lighting up. He was so excited at the idea of this – it was adorable.

"I'm really just a cereal kind of girl," I shrugged. He seemed so eager to please me. "But, you can pour me a bowl, if you like."

He smiled and kissed me fully on the lips. It was a good thing he was still only using closed mouth kisses, otherwise, my breath would have scared him away.

Edward jumped off the bed, and walked around to my side, offering his hand to help me up. It was a gallant gesture, but unnecessary. However, I couldn't refuse the chance to touch him.

His hand was ice cold. I put my other hand on his, trying to warm it up. "You're hands are so cold," I said, rubbing my hands against his.

"I'm cold blooded, I guess," he joked. He leaned down to try to steal another kiss. My hands flew to cover my mouth.

"I need to brush my teeth," I explained. He nodded and kissed my hands that were covering my mouth. I blushed at his touch. For someone who was "cold blooded" he sure knew how to make _me_ hot.

"Okay," he answered. "Where is your toothbrush?"

Did he think he was going to brush my teeth?

"Um, maybe I should eat breakfast before I brush my teeth..." and maybe we could talk about personal space.

Edward nodded. "You should get dressed. It's cold and I didn't know if you wanted me to start a fire or not."

I smiled at him, glanced at the stairs leading to the living room, and then back at him. I raised my eyebrows. Was he taking the hint?

"You want me to leave," he stated, looking crestfallen.

"I want _privacy_ so I can get dressed," I corrected.

"Oh, I'll turn around," he replied, closing his eyes.

I couldn't help but laugh. This man refused to be parted from me, _literally_. I pushed him out of the bedroom. "It'll take five minutes. Surely, we can stand to be separated for _five minutes_?"

Edward cupped my face with his hands. "I will never be able to be separated from you, Bella," he whispered with complete seriousness. His breath was sweet and intoxicating. Somehow he had brushed_ his _teeth this morning. Most people didn't smell this good when they first woke up.

I swallowed nervously and I frowned. "This is a little intense for me, Edward," I admitted. "I think we need to talk."

He stepped back, but looked like he was in pain. "Of course. I'll let you get dressed and I'll wait for you in the living room."

"Thanks," I whispered, wondering how I could have hurt his feeling so easily.

I dressed in my usual layers of clothing, put on my sturdy boots, and pulled my hair back in a pony tail.

I rarely wore make up, but as I looked in the mirror, my eyes were bright and my cheeks had some color, instead of it's usual pale complexion. It was probably because I blushed a million times since I met Edward. I looked..._happy_.

When I walked into the living room/kitchen area I noticed Edward had poured me a bowl of cereal. I had been joking about that, but he did it anyway. Sort of endearing. I picked it up, grabbed a spoon, and joined him on the sofa where he was sitting. He looked deep in thought.

I started eating my breakfast and we sat in silence until Edward spoke.

"Bella, I know that this happening very fast...and that I'm probably smothering you with my attention...but, I honestly can't help it. When someone like me finds the person they are supposed to spend eternity with it's a very all consuming thing. If I can't see your face, my body _aches_. I'm in pain. I must be near you – my survival depends on it."

Most women would swoon at such a declaration, but I had never been normal. I was going to protest.

"You just met me, Edward. I don't want to hurt your feelings, but it's difficult for me to understand _why_ you feel so intensely for me."

He smiled gently. "You're wonderful Bella. You're beautiful, kind, smart, compassionate...you're everything I want in a woman. It doesn't matter that I've just met you. You will always be the only woman I want. I _love_ you."

I didn't know how to respond. A man I had only officially met twenty-four hours ago was telling me he _loved_ me.

"How do you feel about _me_?" he asked, shyly.

"I can't deny that I feel a strong connection to you. You make me feel safe and I want to get to know you better."

I was being cautious. I didn't fully understand what I was feeling. It felt like love, but how could it happen so quickly?

Edward looked at the floor and frowned, clearly hurt. "I've overwhelmed you. I apologize."

He stood up. "I should go."

I stood up with him. "Edward," I whispered, not wanting him to leave, but not knowing what to say to make him stay. He was hurt, by me, and I hated to see it.

"I don't know how to talk to you without telling you _everything_. Once I begin, I don't think I'll be able to stop. I fear that you won't accept me and that you'll reject me. I couldn't bare to lose you."

"You can talk to me," I insisted.

He sighed. "You're not ready. I should have taken things more slowly...been more patient. The fault is mine."

Edward searched my eyes, apparently waiting for a sign that did not come. He dropped his gaze and walked toward me, giving me a strong hug. I closed my eyes, inhaling his scent, feeling comforted at his touch.

"I'll wait for you," he whispered. "However long it takes, I'll wait."

By the time I opened my eyes, he was gone.


	10. Chapter 10

After Edward left, I cried for awhile. I missed him immediately. My entire world changed when I met him and I was running behind my emotions, trying to catch up.

Whatever Edward was afraid to talk to me about, I knew it was important. But, he was right. I wasn't ready. Only a few days ago I dismissed love, convinced that I would never find it. I swore to myself that I was content with loneliness. Then, Edward miraculously appeared in my life and made me believe love at first sight was possible.

Naturally, I freaked out. I was independent and self sufficient. I was inexperienced. Could I open my heart to love? It would require me to be vulnerable and take risk. Edward seemed like a gift from God, an answer to a prayer I didn't realize I prayed. But, opening my heart to him would mean I would have to depend on him. I only depended on myself.

These thoughts were on repeat in my head, and I was so distracted I didn't do any homework. It was my morning off, anyway, so I just sat on the sofa, staring at the empty fireplace. When it was time for me to go to work, I stumbled off to the bus stop, with a frown on my face. I was miserable.

When I arrived at bookstore, I went through my usual routine of checking in with Maria for my assignment, working, eating a late lunch at the cafe, then returning to work. Edward was the only thing I could think of – his face, his touch, his words. I hoped he would make an appearance, to ease my suffering, but he didn't.

When my shift was over, I was the last one to leave, locking up the store, then walking slowly to the bus stop. I felt as though someone had punched me in the stomach. It was a horrible feeling. Was I love sick?

I barely slept at all that night, tossing and turning, feeling nauseous. I kept checking my cell phone to see if Edward had called, but he never did. What did he mean by _waiting_ for me? Did he expect me to make the first move? Although I sort of knew where he lived, I didn't even have his phone number. Why was he being so mysterious? All of this felt like it was happening too fast, and yet not fast enough.

The next morning, I woke early, deciding to go to campus and try to read there before class. I was too distracted by my thoughts to stay at home to get any work done. As I waited for my bus, a dark Mercedes pulled up to the stop. The window rolled down to reveal the most beautiful woman I had ever seen in my entire life. This woman glared at me.

"Get in the car," she demanded.

I took a step back. "Excuse me?"

"Get. In. The. Car."

I glanced to my left and right, wondering if I could make a run for it. The driver's side door opened and Emmett got out of the car.

"Emmett?" I asked, confused.

He looked apologetic and walked over to me. "Sorry, Bella. This is my wife Rosalie. I told her to ask nicely, but she's rather upset..."

"Why is she upset?" I asked, concerned.

"Well, Edward is..." 

My eyes widened. "Is Edward okay? Is he hurt?" I gasped.

Emmett shook his head. "He's okay, but we think he needs to see you. Would you mind coming to our house?" 

Immediately, I got in the car and Emmett and Rosalie drove me to their estate. Emmett seemed to be speaking to Rosalie, but it was so softly I couldn't hear him. He glanced back at me.

"When Edward came home yesterday morning, he went straight to his room," Emmett explained. "That's not so unusual, he likes to be by himself, but he absolutely refused to see anyone. And he...well...you'll see when you get there."

Panic rose within me, I was worried to the point of nauseousness.

As soon as I entered the house I heard guttural moaning, as if someone was dying. I looked up at Emmett.

"Edward?" I whispered in shock. He nodded.

Alice and Jasper met us at the staircase, and Alice gave me a hug.

"Thank you for coming, Bella. Edward has never acted this way before. Carlisle and Esme are out of town and we haven't been able to get in touch with them. We didn't know what to do."

Alice was clearly concerned for Edward, her face looked as worried as mine.

"He won't let any of us help him, either," Jasper added. "But, we think you'll be able to calm him."

I hoped I could help, but I didn't feel very powerful.

"His room is on the second floor, first door on the left," Rosalie informed me. She was not very friendly, but I guessed it was because she was worried about her brother.

I nodded and the others watched me walk up the stairs. I walked down the hall and slowly opened the door to Edward's room.

Edward was curled up on the floor, in the middle of the room. He stopped moaning when I entered the room. I ran to him, collapsed on the floor and began stroking his face.

"Edward..."

"Bella? I was waiting for you..."

He pulled me into his arms, kissed my forehead and I felt his breathing steady. We laid in the floor, face to face, our bodies pressed together. I felt every inch of him and the familiar electricity was comforting.

It occurred to me that I might be falling in love with someone who was mentally ill. But, since meeting Edward, I felt mentally ill myself. Were we both crazy in love?

After several minutes, there was a knock on the door and Jasper and Alice entered. Edward jumped up, bringing me with him, and stood in front of me.

"Mine," he growled. "She's mine."

The sound that came from his chest definitely wasn't human. It scared me. Jasper and Alice backed away with their hands up, in submission. Edward continued to growl until they were gone. Then, he swung around, picked me up, and proceeded to jump out of the second story window and run through the forest.

I thought I would have a heart attack, but was too scared to scream. A human couldn't have done what Edward just did. I closed my eyes, feeling his speed and the wind, until we came to an abrupt halt. Edward sank down into the forest floor, leaning against a tree, and placed me in his lap. He began licking my neck, as if I was a cat and he was cleaning me. It brought pleasure, but I found it..._unusual _to say the least. He then buried his face in the crook of my neck and began to purr.

Edward was acting more like an animal, than a human, but he seemed to be trying to tenderly care for me. Despite the weirdness, I felt incredibly safe and at peace with him. He was obviously distressed, felt threatened, and being with me seemed to calm him down. I rubbed his back. At one point, I fell asleep, only to wake up in the same exact position.

It was cold and dark outside and my teeth began to chatter. I was wearing my parka, which kept me warm, but I'd never stayed outside this long before during the winter. Edward wasn't wearing a coat at all, and that alarmed me.

"Aren't you cold, Edward?" I whispered. "Let's go back home."

"Promise me you won't leave," he begged, kissing my bottom lip.

"I promise," I replied immediately.

He stood up, gently lifting me with him. "I need to hunt...stay here and don't move."

I nodded, confused as to how he was going to hunt without a gun. He kissed me again, leaning me against a tree, pressing his entire body against mine. I craved more, but he broke away, and sniffed the air.

Whatever he smelled, he seemed to chase the scent. He disappeared and a second later I heard the roar of a bear. I was frozen with fear, but worried for Edward's safety. My heart pounded and I wondered what I could do to help. Was Edward going to die?

In that moment of desperation, I realized that I _loved_ Edward. It wasn't rational, I barely knew anything about him, but my soul was bound to his. I couldn't live without him.

I heard a tussle in the woods and then silence. I began to cry, thinking I lost my love.

"Edward," I whimpered.

Immediately, he was by my side, as if he appeared out of thin air.

I gasped in fright, but threw myself in his arms, clinging to him. "You're alive!" I cried.

He laughed quietly and rubbed my back. "In a manner of speaking, yes," he murmured.

I leaned back, to look at his face, to see if he was injured. "Are you hurt...?"

I stopped talking and stepped away from him. His face was without a blemish, perfect as always, but blood was dripping from his mouth.

"Edward..._what_ are you?"


	11. Chapter 11

Thank you so much for all of you who have added this story as a Favorite and/or put it on Story Alert. Also, thank you for supporting the story by leaving reviews. Your feedback means so much to me and encourages me to keep writing! I love the community we have in this fandom. Thanks for reading!

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**EPOV**

I was overwhelmed with emotion as I left Bella's cabin. Although I couldn't read her thoughts, I _could_ see the hesitation and confusion on her face. It cut me like a knife. I had declared my eternal devotion and love for her and she had responded with _I want to get to know you better._

Immediately, I regretted my declaration. I proclaimed my affection for her too soon. It was all my fault. I overwhelmed her.

When Bella insisted I could talk to her, I believed her. But, it was my fear that restrained me. If she was overwhelmed by my feelings, she would be overwhelmed by the truth of what I was.

"You're not ready. I should have taken things more slowly...been more patient. The fault is mine."

I wanted her to protest, insist once again that I could talk to her, but she didn't. So, I left.

When I arrived home, Jasper met me at the front door, along with Alice, their thoughts full of concern.

Jasper tried to calm me, but I refused.

"Leave me alone," I growled, glaring at my brother and sister as I passed by.

_Why are you so upset? Is Bella alright? _Jasper imagined Bella being drained by me. I couldn't handle the image and pushed him up against the wall. Alice gasped.

"Bella is _fine_," I snarled. "I could never do _that_ to her."

Although he could have easily defended himself, Jasper allowed me to pin him against the wall. I had never attacked any of my family members this way and he was mentally cataloguing my emotions.

_Hurt, longing, confusion. You're emotions are so strong, Edward. Let me calm you down._

I felt a tickle of calm begin to affect me and I backed away. "I said _leave me alone_," I grumbled, running up the stairs to my room, leaving Alice and Jasper to stare at each other in disbelief.

I didn't make it any farther than the center of my room before I collapsed into a heap. I remained there for the next twenty-four hours. Jasper did eventually try to calm me down, at Alice's insistence, but it had little affect. My emotions were too strong and I could not be comforted. Rosalie and Emmett came to my side, but I growled until they retreated.

Even though I was clouded by pain and my thoughts of Bella, I didn't ignore the thoughts of my brothers and sisters.

_I've called Carlisle sixty-four times. He hasn't responded._

_He's in the Denali wilderness, there's no cell phone reception there..._

_We could go search for him and Esme. It should take less than a day._

_What if Edward freaks out and attacks us? _

_Alice, what do you see? Which decision will work the best?_

I monitored Alice's thoughts as she scanned the options. After a long search, she settled on Bella. Rosalie and Emmett would pick her up, she would come to me, and everything would be okay. Except, my true self would be revealed. If Bella came to my rescue, there would be no going back. All would be revealed.

Alice didn't push further into the future, but she liked this alternative. Other decisions led me to continue to lie in agony and lash out in ways I would later regret.

Would Bella decide to go with Rosalie and Emmett? The future wasn't set in stone. She had free will. Did she feel the pain of separation as deeply as I did? I doubted it. What was happening to me was indescribable. I couldn't restrain myself from crying out in pain. I felt like I was dying a slow, agonizing death.

I knew my survival depended on Bella, but I had told I would _wait_ for her. Wait for what, I didn't know. A realization, an epiphany, an understanding. As a human I knew she wouldn't fully understand what our connection meant, but she had to know it was more than _I want to get to know you better_. I didn't hold those words against her, but I did want her to surrender to what was happening. Her hesitancy confused me.

When I heard Rosalie and Emmett leave the house I decided that I would try to compose myself. I didn't want Bella to see me in such a state of weakness. But, when I tried to stand up, physically I could _not _move. It scared me. Being without one's mate had the power to _incapacitate _a strong, immortal vampire. I didn't know such a thing was possible.

As soon as I caught Bella's scent in the air, I relaxed, but I could not stop groaning. I needed to feel her touch. She cautiously entered my room, and to my great relief, joined me on the floor. Her heart rate increased, as if she was panicking. When she touched my face, I was immediately at peace.

"Edward?" she whispered.

"Bella? I was waiting for you..."

My groaning ceased, and I pulled her into my arms and kissed her. Our foreheads and noses touched, as our bodies pressed against one another. It felt as we were wrapped in our own cocoon of electricity. I never wanted to move. Somehow, I was even able to tune out the thoughts of my brothers and sisters in the background.

Because of being in this zone of bliss, when there was a knock on the door, I was caught off guard. Something snapped within me and my human characteristics vanished as my vampire instincts took control. No one was going to take Bella from me.

I jumped up, bringing Bella with me, and stood in front of her protectively.

"Mine. She's mine."

I growled, venom dripping from my mouth, until Jasper and Alice retreated. Then, instinct made me take Bella into my arms and flee. I knew Bella's racing heart indicated that she was probably scared, but my mind wasn't able to interpret it into words of comfort. I had an overwhelming instinctive urge to get us to safety.

We eventually collapsed on the forest floor, I propped us against a tree, tucking her into my lap, and began to comfort her the only way I seemed to know how. I was still too inhuman to speak.

Time passed and I settled myself into the crook of her neck, purring. Very slowly, my humanity began to return, although I felt my vampire instincts ready to take over at a moment's notice.

"Aren't you cold, Edward?" Bella chattered. "Let's go back home."

"Promise me you won't leave," I whimpered, kissing her bottom lip. I remembered the pain of our separation and it was unbearable. I was a fool to think I could wait for her. I had to have her _now_.

"I promise," she replied immediately.

Feeling back in my right mind, I pulled us up. Bella's blood didn't tempt me, but I needed to take precautions.

"I need to hunt...stay here and don't move."

She nodded and I pressed her against the tree, ravishing her with a kiss. I wanted more, but hunting now would allow me more time with Bella later. I caught the scent of a bear, and took off into the forest.

It was an easy kill and I didn't feel like playing with my food. I drained the animal as fast as I could, until I heard Bella call my name. Immediately, I returned to her.

"You're alive!" she cried, flinging herself into my arms.

I couldn't help but laugh at her relief. "In a manner of speaking, yes," I murmured.

Bella stepped back, searching my body for harm. "Are you hurt...?"

When her eyes reached my face, they widened in alarm.

"Edward..._what_ are you?"

It was time for the truth. However Bella reacted, I would never leave her side again. She deserved an honest explanation...there was no way to hide or lie about my inhuman-like behavior. Nervously, I met her gaze and decided to go for it.

"I'm not human, Bella. I'm a _vampire_."

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_What are your thoughts on vampire mating? What do you think it would look like? How would it affect Bella since she's a human? Please review!_


	12. Chapter 12

"I'm not human, Bella. I'm a _vampire_."

My eyes widened and my heart rate increased. "_Vampire_," I repeated in a whisper, slightly confused. Could they really exist? Was Edward crazy? What did I even know about them? They were supernatural, immortal, drank the blood of _humans_...

"Whose blood is that?" I asked, taking a step back, noticing a few drops of blood on Edward's lips.

Edward touched his mouth, wiping the blood away. "I feed on the blood of _animals_, instead of humans. I just drank from a bear." He was watching me carefully, his words gentle. "I would never hurt you Bella."

I took another step back and Edward took a step forward.

"Are you afraid of me?" he asked.

I blinked, but didn't answer the question. I wasn't _afraid _of Edward, but I knew he was _dangerous_. My mind reviewed my experience with him – subtle hints that told me he wasn't crazy, he was telling the truth. Edward was _not _human. God like beauty, strength, speed, he never ate or drank or used the bathroom...growling and jumping out of second story windows. I'd never met anyone like Edward and now I knew why. But, as I starred at this man, I knew that him being a vampire didn't change how I felt about him. It didn't matter at all.

"Tell me what you're thinking, Bella," he urged.

As I looked at Edward, I felt safe. The expression on his face was of love and concern.

"I'm thinking that this doesn't change how I feel about you," I whispered.

Edward was genuinely surprised. "Really?"

I stepped closer and wrapped my arms around him. As I laid my head on his chest, I realized I didn't hear a heartbeat. "And how do you feel about me?" he continued, returning the hug.

I blushed. "I...I think I love you, but I don't know why. I just met you."

Edward held me a little tighter. "_I_ love you. I know this is happening quickly, but I promise I will explain everything."

"Will you explain more about being a..._vampire_?" It seemed so ridiculous to even say the word, that is was even possible. I looked up at Edward and smiled, raising an eyebrow. He mirrored the smile and laughed.

"You are truly remarkable, Bella Swan. I was convinced that you would run from me screaming...and I would have to chase you. But, you're so...calm. I thought Jasper would have to help."

"Jasper?"

"Oh," Edward responded, realizing he said something he shouldn't have. "Jasper has a gift of influencing emotions. It's very subtle, but very helpful."

"He's a vampire, too? Alice...Emmett...Rosalie...everyone?"

"Yes."

"I have so many questions," I murmured and then shivered, not from Edward's touch, but from the cold.

Realizing I was freezing, Edward scooped me into his arms. "I _will_ answer all your questions, but let's get you warm first."

I buried my face into his chest, the speed of his running making me dizzy. When we arrived back at the estate, Edward used the front door instead of jumping back through the window. I appreciated that. The family was no where to be seen, but as we entered Edward's room the fireplace was ablaze and there was a tray with a cup of hot chocolate and bowl of mini-marshmallows.

"Thanks, Alice," Edward called out, barely above a whisper. I looked around but she was not in the room.

"She can hear me," he explained, with a smile. "She must have known we were returning and prepared the fire for you. Normally, I don't use it. And, of course, I don't drink hot chocolate, either."

Edward placed me on the ground and unzipped my parka, then wrapped me an already warmed blanket. I stepped out of my boots.

"Alice must have put this blanket in the dryer for you, to heat it up. How thoughtful," Edward remarked.

"That was _me_," a deep voice called out from down the hall. I jumped back, alarmed.

"_Emmett,_" Edward laughed.

"Thank you," I responded, wondering if he could hear me.

"You're welcome!" the deep voice replied.

Edward led me to a high backed leather chair adjacent to the fireplace and pulled me to sit in his lap. He reached to the side table and handed me the cup of hot chocolate, offering marshmallows as well.

I drank it in silence, being warmed by the fire, as Edward played with my hair. Curled up next to him, there wasn't any where else I wanted to be.

"You and your family are awfully _civilized_ vampires," I noted. "You live in a mansion, have impeccable manners and are attentive and thoughtful to your human friends."

I was trying to lighten the mood, show Edward I wasn't intimidated by who he was.

"We _are _unusual for our kind, that is true. Carlisle, our father, for all intents and purposes, wanted to form a family based on bonds of love and commitment to one another. Most vampires are nomads, constantly traveling, searching for blood. We try to maintain a permanent residence and choose to drink from only animals."

"Tell me more," I urged, sipping on my drink.

"I suppose I should start from the beginning..."

For the next several hours, Edward proceeded to tell me his life story, how he met Carlisle, then Esme, his rebellious years, how Rosalie and Emmett joined the family and eventually Jasper and Alice. He told me about their gifts – how he could read minds, although not mine – Alice could see the future and Jasper could influence emotions. I asked questions and Edward patiently answered them.

"So now you know all about me," he finished, stroking my cheek.

"You are..._amazing_, Edward."

He smiled. "It makes me happy to know that I can be myself with you, that you won't reject me for who I am."

Edward was completely relaxed and at peace, the opposite of how I found him this morning. I never wanted to see him such pain again. "What happened today?" I asked. "Why were you so upset? Why did you growl at Jasper and Alice? Why did you run off with me?"

He kissed my forehead. "You've been so patient and understanding. I don't want to scare you."

"Please tell me," I insisted.

Edward sighed and looked a little nervous, but he nodded. "When vampires find their mate, it causes a very strong reaction. It's actually a very rare thing and I didn't know if it would ever happen to me. The moment I saw you in the bookstore, I knew you were destined to be mine. It _shocked_ me, actually. I felt my very core transform."

"I'm your mate?" I stammered. "Like...a _soul_mate?"

"I don't know if I have a soul, but yes...you're my other half. You're my mate. I knew it immediately, but you fainted and I was afraid I would hurt you. I made sure you were safe and then I went to see Carlisle. For lack of a better phrase, I was freaking out. He gave me advice, but I was anxious to return to you. When I went back to the store, you were gone. I investigated, followed your scent and went to your cabin..."

I gasped. "So you were the one! I thought I was going crazy! You broke into my house! You undressed me?"

Edward smiled sheepishly. "I wanted you to be comfortable. I was a gentleman, I promise."

I glared. "You better have been! Did you stay the whole night?"

He nodded. "I made a fire to keep you warm, then I sat by your bed, watching you sleep. I'm sorry...now that I think of it, it is rather..._creepy_ behavior."

I raised my eyebrows. "Kind of...yeah. But, you were trying to take care of me."

"I was...and when you awoke, I left and waited outside. I thought being able to hear you would be enough, but it was driving me crazy to not be able to see your face. As I told you before, I started to _ache_ for you. It was only relieved when you went to sleep again and I was returned to your side to watch you sleep. On Sunday, Alice and Emmett came to check on me. We followed you to the laundromat and grocery store. When you were walking home, Alice and Emmett insisted on meeting you."

"So you _were _stalking me."

"Technically, yes," he grimaced.

"Why did you wait until Monday to introduce yourself? I was thinking about you all weekend. I was dreaming of you."

"You were?"

I blushed, although I didn't have anything to be embarrassed about. I glanced down at my hands. "Yes," I mumbled.

Edward kissed me on the cheek. "You're adorable."

I shivered in pleasure at his touch. "Will you answer the question?" He smiled.

"I didn't except to find a mate, much less a _human_ one. I didn't know how to react, except that I had to be near you. On Tuesday morning, after we spent the night together, I realized you were feeling overwhelmed...and to be honest, I felt the same way. But, when I left, I completely disintegrated. I collapsed in my room and was unable to move for 24 hours."

I gasped in concern. "Edward," I whispered, putting my hand on his face. The idea of him being in pain was unbearable to me.

"Perhaps only Carlisle can explain _why_ I'm feeling this way, but I can tell you _how_ I feel. I must be with you at all times. My survival depends on it. I delight in taking care of you. I never want us to be separated."

Warmth filled my body. It was more than a blush. It was the feeling of being completely loved. I realized Edward was putting into words exactly what I feeling for him. It was overwhelming.

I buried my face into his chest and started crying. He stiffened for a moment, then relaxed and began rubbing my back. "Did I say something wrong? I can't apologize for how I feel. It won't ever change."

I leaned back and wiped the tears from my eyes. I didn't want to upset him. "No, it's not that," I gasped between sobs. "It's that...I feel...the same way about you..."

Edward silenced my sobs with a kiss on the lips. It was tender, but passionate. I eagerly responded. Although I don't know how much time passed, it was as though no one else existed. It was much like our first evening together, our first kiss, a very powerful magnetism between us. The more I kissed him, the more my desire for him grew. But, although Edward seemed as eager as I was, he was subtly restrained. I leaned back.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

He leaned in, trying to steal another kiss. "Nothing is wrong."

I put a finger on his lips. "Edward..."

He sighed and sat back, but pulled me with him. If our chests weren't pressed together, neither of us felt completely comfortable.

"You notice everything, don't you?"

I smiled. "Not_ everything..._but it seems like something is bothering you."

I frowned, realizing what it could be. "Am I not a good kisser? I'm sorry if I'm doing it wrong...I..."

Edward shook his head and interrupted me. "Love, you are perfect. It's not that at all. It's that I have to be _careful _with you. Your blood doesn't tempt me, but if I don't control myself, my strength could hurt you...even kill you. Also..." He looked embarrassed, which didn't seem natural for him. "My mouth is full of venom...I can't kiss you how I _want_ to kiss you because of that."

"Oh," I replied, simply, realizing the complications of being in love with someone of another species.

"So it will always be this way?" It made me sad and _frustrated_ to think that our relationship wouldn't be able to progress to _more_. Edward had awakened something in me and now I wasn't sure if it would ever be satisfied.

Edward's eyes looked troubled, but also hopeful.

"Let's take one day at a time, shall we?"


	13. Chapter 13

**A/N:** Thank you for all the reviews. I try to respond to all personally, but this week has been really busy and I wasn't able to reply to all. However, I do cherish them. There are thousands of readers...please support this story with a review! Thanks!

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One. Day. At. A. Time.

_Time. _

My eyes widened and I jumped off Edward's lap, stumbling until he steadied me.

"What time is it?" I asked in a panic.

Edward glanced at a clock. "6:30. You haven't eaten all day...I should get you dinner."

"_6:30_? I have to go!"

I missed my class this morning and never showed up for work. When I was with Edward the world disappeared. How could I be so irresponsible?

"Why do you have to go?" Edward asked, looking hurt and confused.

"I have to get to the bookstore. I'm about...oh..._six hours_ late for work!"

I searched around the room for my backpack, which I quickly realized I left in the car in which Rosalie and Emmett picked me up. I would need to call Maria and apologize profusely and tell her I would be there to close the store tonight. Hopefully, she wouldn't fire me.

"You don't have to work, Bella. I'll take care of you."

"Uh, what?" I stopped panicking and looked directly at Edward.

"My family is very wealthy. Money is not an issue for us and now it's not an issue for you."

I rolled my eyes and shook my head. "Don't be silly. I'm not going to take your _money_."

"_My_ money is _your _money," Edward insisted. "You don't need a job anymore."

I knew Edward was being honest about his wealth. It was apparent by the Cullen mansion. I'd never seen anything so luxurious, especially in Alaska. And I knew that I was connected to Edward in an eternal love kind of way that I didn't completely understand, but I couldn't believe he was trying to give me money. It was almost offensive.

"Are you serious?"

Edward nodded his head.

There was no way I could accept his offer. Although I liked working in a bookstore, it was still _work_. Part of me would love to be independently wealthy and not have to work. But, that was the thing – I was _independent_. I'd always earned my own money, paid my own way. It didn't matter if Edward was my other half, I was still going to take care of myself.

"I'm not quitting my job," I spoke firmly.

Edward looked as though he was listening to something, a sound wave that I couldn't hear. His eyes returned to me and he smiled faintly.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to offend you. I want you to do what makes you happy."

Immediately, my growing anger subsided. I briefly wondered if it was Jasper influencing my mood or whether Edward himself was having this affect on me.

"I would be happy if I had my backpack," I replied. "My phone is in it and I need to call the bookstore. I think I left it in the car..."

"Of course," Edward dutifully nodded and held my hand. "Let's go get it."

He led me out of his bedroom and down the stairs. When we reached the bottom, Alice and Jasper appeared, holding my backpack. Edward gripped my hand tightly and stepped in front of me, as if to protect me. He stance was rigid.

"Edward!" Alice shrieked. "We're not going to _hurt_ Bella."

I felt a wave of relaxation and yawned. "Alice, maybe we should give them their space. Here's your backpack, Bella." Jasper cautiously set my backpack on the ground and then pulled Alice away. They retreated much like they had done earlier in the day, their hands up, not turning their back to Edward.

"What was that about?" I asked, suddenly worried now that Alice and Jasper were out of view. "Were they going to hurt me?"

Edward did not turn around. He was still guarding me. "Just give me a moment, please, while I calm down."

I was more than confused by Edward's actions. At least this time he didn't take me in his arms and start running. Alice and Jasper were his family members. If Edward felt threatened by them, how much more would he feel threatened by Maria or Dave or complete strangers in Fairbanks?

I waited a moment, then slowly inched towards my backpack to pick it up. It was hard to search for my phone with only one free hand, but as I tried to let go of Edward's hand, he wouldn't release it.

"Let's go into the living room," he suggested calmly, still in deep concentration. I nodded and he led me into the next room, sitting on a sofa and pulling me into his lap. I wondered if he would ever allow me to sit by myself again.

Since I was in his lap, Edward released my hand, and I reached for my phone and quickly dialed the bookstore. Maria answered on the third ring.

"Hi, this is Bella. I'm _so sorry_ I didn't come into work today. A friend needed my help and I completely lost track of time."

"A _friend_?" Edward whispered with a grin. I held a finger to my lips to tell him to be quiet.

"You've always called before if you were going to be late. We thought something happened to you..." Maria's voice was tense. She seemed concerned, but also annoyed.

"I can be there in a half hour and stay until closing. I am so sorry. This won't happen again."

"Alright," Maria sighed. "I'll see you soon."

"Okay, thank you. Goodbye!"

"Uh huh." Click. The line went dead. Maria was _angry_.

I looked at Edward with a worried look.

"I can talk to her," he offered. "Smooth things over."

I shook my head. "It's okay. She'll get over it. But, I need to go _now_. Do you think Rosalie or Emmett will drive me back into town?"

Edward looked genuinely offended. "_Rosalie_ or _Emmett_?"

I shrugged. "They drove me here, I just thought..."

"When I said earlier that I must be with you at all times...that I never want us to be separated, I meant it. I know this will make your life more complicated and probably annoy you, but I'm not going to leave you."

Yes, that would make my solitary life more complicated. But, I didn't want to be without him, either. Practically, I didn't know how that would work out, though.

"What happened just now with Alice and Jasper?" I asked, changing the subject. "Were they going to hurt me or were you just worried they would?"

"I'm sorry about that. I honestly don't understand why I reacted that way. I feel very..._protective _of you. Rationally, I know I can trust my family, but instinctually, I'm on guard."

"How are you going to act when I'm at the bookstore? Are you going to growl at Maria?"

Edward smiled. "Maybe."

My mouth dropped open and he continued. "I'm kidding. I can control myself. I'll be good, I promise."

"Hmm..." I responded, not knowing what to say, my mind reeling from the revelations I received during the last several hours. I began to feel tired and hungry, but I needed to go to work.

"Will you drive me to work, then?"

He smiled again, as if that request delighted him more than anything in the world.

"Your wish is my command."

I stood up, feeling impatient and anxious. "I'll go get my coat." It was still in Edward's bedroom.

"_We'll_ go get your coat," Edward corrected.

Oh dear. What had I gotten myself into?


	14. Chapter 14

A/N: Finally created a Twitter account for the fandom. Please follow me and I'll follow you back! **Twitter dot com slash verseseven**

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Once we arrived at the bookstore, Edward insisted on talking to Maria. She seemed suspicious at first, but by the end of the conversation she was blushing and laughing. She even gave me a _hug_ before she left for the evening. Edward knew exactly what she wanted to hear and all was forgiven. I was impressed, even though it had been obvious manipulation.

"Doesn't hurt to have a mindreader as a soulmate, huh?" Edward asked smugly, once Maria was gone.

I rolled my eyes, not knowing whether he was seriously that arrogant or just being sarcastic.

"Are you sure you can't read _my_ mind?" I asked. It would be mortifying if he knew what I was thinking.

"Of all the people in the world, I wish I could read _your_ mind, but it is a mystery to me. It's incredibly frustrating."

I smiled. Edward looked annoyed and I knew he was telling the truth. At least I had _some _privacy, since he was refusing to leave me alone.

It wasn't that I wanted Edward to leave. On some level, I wanted to be with him just as much as he wanted to be with me. I _felt _the connection, but that didn't make it any less strange. At one point Edward followed me to the bathroom again, although he remained outside the door. A few customers came and went. Edward sat in a chair, reading a book, but his body language was tense whenever anyone was near or talked to me. No one was trying to hurt me, no men were flirting with me. I didn't understand why he seemed to be so possessive and literally refused to let me out of his sight. Would he insist on coming to work with me every day? Maybe it _would_ be easier if I quit my job, I thought. Edward was trying really hard to give me space to work, but it was obviously uncomfortable for him. But, I couldn't just _quit my job _for a man. That was something my mother Renee would do and I wasn't like her. I was different. I was independent...I was...

"Bella, it's 9:15pm. Isn't it time to close the store?" Edward interrupted my worried thoughts.

I blushed. "Thank you! I was lost in thought..."

For a moment, Edward looked concerned, but I avoided his gaze and went to check if the backdoor was locked and turn off the lights. Surprisingly, Edward didn't follow me, but he remained at the door, holding my coat and backpack until I returned. Being a gentleman, he helped me put on my coat and held my bag for me while I locked the front door of the bookstore. He opened the passenger side door of his car for me, closed it, and then got in himself.

"Sorry it's so cold. I'm going to get a car that has automatic ignition, to warm it up for you before we have to drive anywhere."

"I've lived in Alaska for three years, I'm used to the cold," I replied dismissively.

Edward shrugged, but I noticed the flash of hurt in his eyes. I reached out to hold his hand.

"It is _really thoughtful_, though, for you to think of that. Thank you."

He smiled and my heart fluttered. Edward was dazzling. He leaned over to kiss me and when our lips met I realized how much I missed his touch. But, I refrained myself from attacking him in the car. Suddenly, I felt a little shy and insecure. I couldn't believe he wanted to be with _me_. It didn't seem real.

"It's nice to have a ride home and not have to take the bus," I remarked, feeling thankful for Edward's kindness.

"You won't ever have to take the bus again," Edward replied happily, squeezing my hand.

I smiled, but inside I began to panic. What if I _wanted_ to take the bus? Would he let me? I had never been in a relationship before and didn't know what the rules were when you were part of a couple. Renee and Phil had a pleasant relationship, but she did whatever he wanted. If Edward and I were now _together,_ what did that mean practically? Did I have to ask his permission? We weren't _married_...

"I think you worry too much," Edward remarked quietly.

I glanced over at him. "You can read my thoughts? You said you couldn't!"

He grinned. "No, I can't read your mind, but I have spent a lot of time watching you. When you get distracted by your thoughts, your forehead wrinkles up."

I relaxed. "Oh. Sorry."

"You don't have to apologize. I just want you to know that I'm here for you if you need to talk."

Edward's sincerity made my heart melt and I thought I would cry. I never had _anyone_ to talk to. Partly, that was my own fault. I was an introverted workaholic that avoided people. But, it felt very nice to not be alone anymore, to have someone there for me if I needed it.

"Thank you," I replied, but a yawn escaped with it. I was tired and ready to go home. I noticed we were heading the opposite direction of my house. "You missed the turn, my cabin is on Gold Hill Road."

As a vampire, I knew he had a photographic memory. It occurred to me he hadn't forgotten. He was intentionally taking me somewhere other than home.

"I thought we'd stay at my house tonight," Edward told me. "It's much warmer and you'll be more comfortable there."

I was outraged. How dare he make a decision without talking to me, try to tell me what to do? Maybe that was how it worked in a "couple" but it wasn't going to work with _me_.

"Take me home," I replied icily, removing my hand from Edward's and shifted my body towards the door and away from him.

Noticing my tone of voice and change in body language, Edward immediately responded, making a u-turn in the middle of the empty road.

"Okay."

When we arrived at my cabin, I didn't wait for Edward to open the car door for me. I jumped out and stomped to the front door. As I unlocked the door, I glanced back and noticed Edward wasn't with me. He was standing by his car with his arms folded, an unreadable expression on his face. Suddenly, I felt very silly for being so upset.

"Aren't you coming in?" I asked quietly, too low for him to hear me.

Apparently he did because within a second, he was by side. I gasped and jumped back in fright. He leaned his forehead against mine.

"Sorry, I'll try to move at human speed from now on. I just feel so comfortable with you, it's too easy to be myself."

Comforted by his touch, I was no longer alarmed. "I _want _you to be yourself with me."

Edward replied with a kiss and I felt my entire body turn to jelly, but at least I didn't faint. He pulled me inside and closed the door, while we continued to kiss, then set me on the sofa. When he broke away to start a fire, I grabbed on to his jacket and pulled him closer to me.

"Love, you'll freeze to death if I don't start a fire..." he whispered between kisses.

I whimpered in protest. My body was on fire with desire. I would hardly freeze to death.

Still, he insisted we stop for a moment, although it only took a few seconds for him to put logs into the fireplace and light a match before he returned to my side. Suddenly, it made sense why Edward wanted us to spend the night at his house, instead of my dry, unheated cabin. Edward's touch was making me hot, but he lips and body _were_ cold. Instead of being controlling, maybe Edward had only been looking out for my well being? I felt even more silly for being upset. I should have talked to him about it instead of immediately insisting he take me home. It seems I had a lot to learn about being in a relationship.

"Where were we?" Edward asked, leaning in again to continue ravishing me with kisses.

I sighed and inched closer to him. Despite the limitations of closed mouth kisses, it was still extremely pleasurable being this close to Edward. He also began to cautiously use his hands, running his fingers through my hair, putting his hands under my shirt to hold my waist. He lifted me up and placed me on his lap. I straddled him, and he cupped my bottom with his hands to draw me closer to him. I'd never been this close to a man, in this way, and I wasn't sure if it was what I thought it was, but I felt his _erection_ and it surprised me. Edward was a vampire, but he was also very much a man at this moment.

The heat, excitement and pleasure was almost too much to bear. Was it this intense for _every_ couple? I was experiencing first hand what it meant to be all "hot and bothered." We continued to enjoy one another for awhile, until I felt Edward become rigid.

"What's wrong?" I whispered, burrowing my face into the crook of his neck. He smelled so good.

"I'm enjoying this _too _much," he replied seriously. "I'm afraid if we keep this up, I won't be able to stop."

"What if I don't want you to stop?" I asked, surprised at my boldness.

"I'm not human, Bella. I could hurt you. I _would _hurt you. I'm so sorry."

I leaned back to look into his eyes. He was truly conflicted and the frustration I felt at not being satisfied disappeared and was replaced with compassion. I stroked his cheek.

"It's alright," I whispered, unstraddling myself. He stretched out his arm and I curled up next to him, putting my head on his chest and arm around his waist. We were still touching, but the distance allowed enough space for us to both calm down.

Without even realizing it, my eyes closed and I fell fast asleep. When I awoke to the smell of breakfast, I was in my pajamas, in my bed. I glanced at the clock. It was still early and it was Thursday. No class this morning, I was due to work at the bookstore at 11:30am.

Edward was in the kitchen, putting eggs, bacon and toast on a plate. Since he didn't eat food, I knew it was for me. And I was suddenly starving, not having ate at all the day before. I glared suspiciously at Edward.

"What?" he asked, confused.

"You changed my clothes again," I pointed out, looking down at my pajamas. At least it was the pair I usually wore, not the nightgown he seemed to prefer.

He grinned. "I didn't look, I promise. Maybe I _felt_ a little, but I was a gentleman." He winked and I rolled my eyes. "Breakfast for the human. It smells awful. I hope my cooking isn't awful as well."

I whipped the sleep from my eyes and yawned. It was extremely thoughtful of Edward to make breakfast for me.

"You didn't have to do this," I insisted, as I sat down at the table and picked up a fork.

"You don't like people taking care of you," Edward stated. It wasn't a question.

I shrugged. "I guess it makes me a little uncomfortable," I admitted. "I've always taken care of myself. But, thank you. I do appreciate it." I smiled and reached out to touch his hand.

He returned the smile, but it was cautious. "Will you let me take care of you or will you always resist?"

"Can't we take care of each other?" I offered.

Edward's smile widened. "This is new for _both_ of us. I know my overprotectiveness is annoying you and you're used to being completely independent. Not to mention the fact that we come from different backgrounds..."

"Vampire..._human_," I clarified.

He nodded. "Vampire, human. We finally found each other. We're _together_ now. But, we have to figure out how it's going to work with our differences..."

I was glad he brought up the subject first. The practicalities of our relationship was what worried me most. The mystery of it all and our connection didn't seem to bother me so much, although I did have questions about it.

"I'm sorry about last night, for making a decision by myself for us to return to my house. I should have talked to you first."

I sighed. "And I'm sorry for reacting so immaturely. I should have talked to you, too."

He smiled and seemed relieved. "We're both learning what it means to be part of a couple."

It was surprising how much Edward and I thought alike, without even knowing it. It was good to know we were struggling with the same issues and coming to the same conclusions. We just needed to talk to each other about it.

"Are we going to get married?" I blurted out impulsively.

Edward grinned. "Are you proposing to me, Bella Swan?"

I blushed. "NO! No, no, no, no, no..."

The force of my words seemed to offend Edward. He looked crestfallen. I tried to explain.

"I'm not interested in getting _married_...don't worry about that. I was just wondering how to define our relationship. Yesterday you said I was your _mate_. To be honest, I don't really know what that means or what expectations that holds. Would the human equivalent be marriage?"

Practicalities. I was always interested in practicalities.

"Humans divorce and remarry. When a vampire finds his or her mate, it's a permanent thing. Eternal. I will never love anyone else, but you."

I blushed again at this confession of commitment over breakfast. Edward spoke so confidently and so matter of fact.

"What if I do something you don't like? Or you get to know me and find out how boring I really am?"

"What I feel for you is unconditional, Bella. I'll always love you and you'll always be the most fascinating creature to me. We'll be together for eternity."

"Eternity?"

The look of alarm on Edward's face revealed that he said too much. "It's something we should discuss, but not now. I think it's too soon."

"You're immortal," I reminded myself. He told me yesterday during our long conversation, but it hadn't clicked until now. Edward would never die, but _I_ would.

Edward knelt by my side, putting a hand on my thigh and one behind my back. "You're worried. That's why I think we should put this conversation on hold. It worries me too, but we don't have to deal with this now. We have time."

I trusted his judgement. I didn't like to think about unpleasant things anyway. Being separated from Edward, even by death of old age, made me nauseated to think about. Suddenly, I wasn't so hungry.

I stood up.

"I should get dressed."

"You haven't finished your breakfast," Edward protested.

"Oh..."

For his benefit, I sat back down and finished eating. He had gone to all the trouble of making it for me and it would be rude to not eat it. And I also didn't want him to know how worried I was about our eventual separation, even if it would be happening in fifty plus years.

While I ate, Edward typed furiously on his phone, either texting or emailing someone. Noticing my curiosity, he explained. "I'm asking Carlisle for a couple of favors. It's a _surprise_." He winked at me.

To _my_ surprise, Edward didn't follow me to the bedroom while I changed, but remained downstairs to clean up the kitchen. We were making progress. Although, when I finished dressing I found myself rushing downstairs to see him again. How could I miss him so much even though it was only five minutes of not seeing his face? I leapt into his arms and he hugged me, seeming to miss me as much I as missed him. We were both ridiculous.

Edward _did_ follow me to the outhouse, which was just as embarrassing as the first time he did it because now I knew about his enhanced vampiric skills – he couldn't read my mind, but he could _hear_ everything. I tried not to think about it and when I finished, I refused to look at him until we were back inside the cabin, and I washed my hands.

He sat down on the sofa and held out his arms, beckoning me to him. I desperately wanted to join him, sit and cuddle with him all day, but I had responsibilities.

"I have homework," I explained apologetically. I was also working on a novel, which I hadn't touched in days, after writing it obsessively for years. The idea of sharing it with Edward embarrassed me. It was too personal. What if he didn't like it?

Edward wasn't phased. He stood up. "Do you need to sit at your desk?"

"No, it's just reading. I actually have a test tomorrow, but it's all essay."

"Where do you usually read?"

"On the sofa..."

Edward smiled and sat back down. I went to my desk and picked up the textbook, a thick anthology, and walked over to the sofa. I sat on the end, away from Edward.

"You're going to distract me. I need to concentrate," I explained. He wasn't offended, but nodded with a grin.

"I understand."

I looked at him. I would be reading for a couple of hours. He would get bored sitting there, waiting for me. I didn't want him to leave, either.

"Would you like a book to read? We could read together." I stood up and walked over to my wall of books.

"I like that idea," Edward replied following me. "What's your favorite book?"

I picked up a worn edition of Withering Heights. "Old school, I know. But it's irresistible."

Edward was standing behind me and he kissed my neck. "_You're irresistible._"

I shivered in pleasure. "Edward! I have to _focus._" I turned around and shoved the book in his hand. "If you want to read something else, help yourself. I have a couple of new biographies I got from the library..."

"You haven't kissed me this morning," he pointed out, pressing my body lightly against the book case. I placed my hands on his biceps.

"_Edward_," I cautioned, but I didn't try to move.

"Just one kiss and I'll wait patiently until you have time to give me another one."

How could I refuse him? I smiled and he leaned down and gently pressed his lips against mine. Every time we kissed it was like time stood still. The electricity, his scent, the intimacy...my heart beat wildly and I almost fainted. Edward caught me, but pulled away. I instinctively tried to kiss him again, but he put his finger against my lips.

"One kiss," he admonished. "You have homework."

I groaned. "You're such a tease."

Edward laughed to himself, as I grabbed his hand and led him back to the sofa. This time I didn't try to sit away from him. I stretched out on the sofa and snuggled up against him. Thankfully, his presence brought me comfort instead of distraction. I was able to fully concentrate and comprehend what I was reading. By the time I needed to leave for work, I felt confident I would do well on my exam.

"I should read with you more often, it felt so _productive_."

"I'm glad. It's time for work, I presume?"

I nodded. "What are we going to do? You'll be so bored if you have to sit there waiting for me for eight or nine hours. Plus, I don't think Dave or Maria would like my boyfriend hanging around the store, either."

"So, I'm your _boyfriend_?" he responded playfully.

I blushed. "Um...aren't you?"

"I thought I was a little more than that," he replied, taking a strand of my hair and playing with it.

"I don't think most humans would understand the concept of a _mate,_" I pointed out.

Edward looked at me, suddenly serious. "But, _you_ do, don't you Bella?"

His intensity surprised me. "Um...yes," I swallowed, although it felt a bit untruthful. I had a feeling I didn't understand it the way Edward did.

"You're right. _Boyfriend,_" he spoke the word with distaste, "will have to do for now. Shall I drive my _girlfriend _to work?"

I laughed and rolled my eyes. "Yes, please. Thank you."

Always the gentleman, Edward helped me into my coat. I locked the cabin door and began walking to Edward's car, but noticed it was already running.

"How did you do that?" I asked in astonishment.

He shrugged. "I'm fast."

On the drive to work I realized we never finished our conversation about what Edward would do while I was at work. I couldn't imagine he would leave me alone, and to be honest, I didn't want him to. But, I didn't want to upset my boss, either. Edward was smiling as he drove, all confidence and contentment. Instead of worrying about it, I decided to relax and see what would happen.

Thankfully, I was a few minutes early. I hoped Maria noticed and was still in a forgiving mood. Dave was at the counter, back from his trip, talking to a few customers. I hung up my jacket, clocked in and put on my name tag. When Dave noticed me and Edward he nodded and smiled, as if he was impressed. He quickly excused himself from the customers and came to talk to us.

"Hello, Bella. Edward it's nice to finally meet you."

How did Dave know about Edward? I guessed Maria told him how I blew off work to spend time with Edward.

"I'm sorry about yesterday, Dave. It won't happen again," I apologized.

Dave waved his hand. "Don't worry about it. I know you're very busy. Whenever you can make it, we'd be glad for you to help. But, you don't have to follow the schedule anymore."

My mouth dropped open. He sounded sincere, but his words seemed passive aggressive, which was completely unlike Dave.

"Are you firing me?" I squeaked out.

Dave's eyes widened and he glanced at Edward. "Of course not," he stammered. "I just wanted you to know you can work when you feel like it. You don't have a schedule anymore."

I felt Edward tense and I looked at him starring at Dave. The bookstore owner looked at Edward once again and swallowed nervously.

"I should get back to the customers...it was nice to meet you Edward. Bella, Maria has your assignments for the day." He quickly rushed off.

"That was _weird_," I remarked to Edward.

"Bella, don't be mad..." he began.

"What did you do?" I asked, noticing the guilty look on his face.

"This morning, I asked Carlisle for a favor. I asked him to smooth things over with Dave so that I would be more welcome here while you worked, so you wouldn't get in trouble..."

I gasped. _My family is very wealthy._.._My money is your money_.

"Edward Cullen! Did you _buy_ the bookstore?"


	15. Chapter 15

**EPOV**

"Edward Cullen, did you buy the bookstore?"

Damn. My love was perceptive. But, not entirely accurate.

"No, I didn't _buy_ the bookstore. My family made a generous purchase of books and are contracted to do so every month for the next two years."

Bella's heart was pounding and blood was rushing to her face. She was so angry she was shaking.

"How much did you spend?" she asked, her jaw tense.

I sighed, feeling extremely nervous. "Money isn't an issue for us. It wasn't that much..."

"How much?" she hissed.

"Half a million dollars."

Bella's mouth dropped open and she squeaked. Before she could tell me to go away, I continued speaking.

"The books are being donated to local elementary schools, libraries and the children's hospital. I thought it would be a way to help others, but also allow me to spend time at the bookstore with you. Dave couldn't object if I was a generous customer..."

She seemed to calm down slightly, but was still glaring at me. Bella blinked several times, then shut her eyes. She rubbed her temples as if she had a headache.

"Edward, this is too much. This makes me so..._uncomfortable_."

I wished I was able to read her mind, although her body language and words were communicating loudly enough. Dave and a few customers had noticed the intensity of the conversation, but not the words. Bella's heartbeat was slower, but still unusually fast. I didn't want her to faint. I reached out for her hand and led her to a more secluded section of the store, away from curious human ears.

"There's nothing I wouldn't do for us to be together, Bella," I spoke, trying to calm her down. "I love you. Please don't be mad at me." I squeezed her hand and looked deeply into her eyes.

"Did you tell Dave to cut my hours?" she asked quietly.

"No," I responded with force. "That was his own decision. I promise I didn't even mention you. Maria told him about you and me and it was completely his own idea."

I was actually incredibly annoyed he had cut Bella's hours. I knew from reading his thoughts he believed he was being helpful, even _rewarding _Bella for bringing that kind of business his way. But the contract was supposed to be confidential. I was going to tell Bella eventually, but not immediately. Thankfully, she was quickly calming down.

"Was this the _surprise _you mentioned earlier?"

"Yes."

"What other surprises do you have?"

"What do you mean?"

"I know you, Edward, even if I just met you. Did you make an arrangement at UAF? Are you suddenly enrolled in my class?"

I couldn't help but smile, even if I was in trouble. Although Bella didn't understand it, she _did_ feel our mate connection. She seemed to know what I was thinking without even realizing it.

"I'm _auditing _American Renaissance. Not required to do homework or take exams, but able to attend class."

"There are only four weeks left in the semester. A little late don't you think?"

I felt a tinge of rejection, even though I knew it was ridiculous. "Do you not want me with you?"

Bella sighed and leaned her head against my chest. "What am I going to do with you, Edward?"

I wrapped my arms around her. "You're not getting rid of me, that's for sure."

"Half a million dollars? Really? I'm sure you could have just asked Dave if you could volunteer."

"I was trying to impress you," I admitted. "I thought it would be a romantic gesture. You love books."

She groaned and leaned back to look at me. "Romantic gestures are _flowers_ or _a love letter_...not spending half a million dollars to hang out with me."

"I plan on doing those things, too," I replied.

"No more surprises. Can you promise me that?"

I shifted uncomfortably. "Okay. But, I do have to confess one more thing."

Her eyes widened. "What is it?"

"We donated the books to local charities in _your_ name. Each book will have a sticker that says "Donated by Isabella Swan.""

Bella cringed. "_Edward_..."

"You don't like the attention." She didn't have to say it. I already knew.

"No, I don't. Not at all."

"I'm sorry. The first shipment hasn't arrived yet. I'll make the donations completely anonymous."

She breathed a sigh of relief. "Thank you."

For a few seconds Bella was silent, deep in thought. I waited anxiously for her to speak.

"I suppose I should work now, even though I could go on vacation if I felt like it..."

I was glad she brought up the subject. During the evening, while she was sleeping, I had an idea. But, even though I made a mistake about the surprises, I was actually planning on talking to Bella about this one.

"Speaking of vacation, next week is Thanksgiving. Do you have plans?"

She shook her head. "My class is canceled Monday and I have the rest of the week off. Dave is also closing the store for the long weekend because he goes to Anchorage to visit family."

I was going to be be bold. Hopefully, she wouldn't protest too much.

"Would you be open to the idea of the two of us going away together?"

Bella's heartbeat increased. I took this as a good sign. She raised her eyebrows.

"Away together?"

"We could leave to spend the week at my family's cabin in Denali. I know the perfect spot to watch the Northern Lights. We could spend time alone together."

Bella blushed and shifted her gaze. It hadn't occurred to me that she may want to spend the holiday with her friends or family. She hadn't mentioned anyone, though, since we met.

"A vacation sounds nice..." she agreed, acting casual, but her heart was still pounding.

I expected her to refuse but she was being reasonable! I kissed her on the cheek, trying to calm her down, but it only seemed to make Bella more flustered.

"Can we leave after your class on Friday or do you want to stay and work?" I whispered in her ear.

Our faces were only an inch apart.

"We can leave after my exam. I'll let Dave know."

I leaned in to kiss Bella on the lips, wishing desperately that I could deepen it. Bella's blood didn't tempt me, but my mouth was a pool of venom, with razor sharp teeth. It wasn't safe to kiss her the way I desired. She sighed in contentment and opened her mouth, but I moved to kissing her neck. When Bella clung to me, I heard Maria thinking about Bella. I squeezed Bella gently with a hug, then separated us.

"Maria is looking for you," I panted. Touching Bella, being close to her in any way, affected me deeply. I couldn't wait to have an entire week alone with her, without responsibilities and distractions.

Bella was trembling and almost looked like she was going to collapse.

"Are you alright, love?" I asked, full of concern. The hospital was only two miles away. Carlisle could examen her...

"I'm fine, I'm fine," she insisted, straightening up. "I'll go find Maria before she finds us."

With that, she half stumbled away, and I waited a couple seconds before following her, although I was instantly picking up other's thoughts to monitor her every move. I went to sit in my usual spot, in a seat in the middle of the store that gave me a good view of Bella wherever she was working.

I was getting better at controlling my body language, but it was increasingly difficult to be in public with Bella. I felt protective to the point of murder if someone even remotely thought of her in any way at all. The night before I charmed Maria, but I had also been completely on guard. With Dave, I knew he thought of Bella as a daughter, but I was also on guard, tense. Rationally, I knew these people wouldn't harm Bella, but being in public at all was a risk. Bella was human, she was fragile. Anything could happen. My instincts told me to grab Bella and run for safety.

I hadn't seen my family in a few days. From their text messages I knew Carlisle and Esme were anxious to meet Bella. My brothers and sisters left messages as well, and half a dozen emails, wanting to know how things were going, when I would bring her home, etc. I ignored them all since I was so wrapped up with Bella. Thankfully, they hadn't made any unexpected personal appearances. It was probably due to Carlisle insisting they give me my personal space. I knew it was hard for them, to not be involved, since we were always so involved in one another's lives and I had been the only single family member for several decades. When I contacted Carlisle earlier that morning he was thrilled to hear from me and eager to take care of those favors.

My cell phone buzzed in my jacket pocket. A text message from Carlisle.

_Arrangements have been made with the bookstore and university. Will you bring Bella home tonight? _

Keeping an eye on Bella and monitoring her from other's thoughts, I replied to Carlisle.

_Thank you. No, we're staying at her place. Tomorrow I'm taking her to our cabin in Denali for the Thanksgiving holiday week. Is that alright with you?_

I knew I didn't need to ask permission, but I wanted to honor my father's leadership of our family.

_Of course. When will we meet Bella? Esme can barely contain her excitement._

I didn't want to admit my fears to Carlisle, but I was apprehensive about bringing Bella around the family. After Bella refused to go to my house last night, worry ran wild. With my increasing feeling of protectiveness, along with my reaction to Jasper and Alice being around Bella, I no longer thought it was a good idea to be near my family. If any of them had a _hint_ of a thought about desiring her blood, I feared I would attack. Perhaps if I spent more time with her, and practiced being with her around humans, I wouldn't feel so irrational.

_Soon. If Bella agrees, we can spend Christmas together._

_Wonderful! I'll let Esme know. The others will be thrilled as well. Have a good time in Denali. Let us know if you need anything. _

_Thank you Carlisle._

Bella had a late lunch in the cafe and I pretended to eat as well. All of the bookstore staff were excited to see Bella with a man, a _rich _man no less, and were watching our every move. Bella looked confused as she watched me eat, until I opened the napkin I was holding where I was depositing food after wiping my mouth between bites. She rolled her eyes and glanced towards the counter, immediately understanding the reason for my behavior. Bella waved at her coworkers, who replied with embarrassment and thoughts of being caught, and they scattered.

It wasn't very busy at the bookstore and when Dave offered to close the store and let Bella leave early, she didn't fight it. From my observations and reading the thoughts of Dave and Maria, Bella seemed to have workaholic tendencies. I was happy that she was agreeing to go home early, even if it was just a simple gesture, because that meant Bella was learning to not push herself so hard.

She looked tired when we arrived at her cabin and I was reminded of how exhausted humans could become. As an immortal with no need for sleep, the concept of rest was remote and vague. I should have been more attentive. I was convinced more than ever that going away for the week would be good for Bella. She could rest and maybe even have fun.

"If you don't mind, I think I'd like to go straight to bed. I need to get up early to go over my notes for my exam tomorrow." Bella yawned and stretched her arms.

"Of course," I replied, as I finished lighting the fire.

To my delight, Bella took my hand and led me up the stairs to her bedroom loft. She was taking the initiative, wanting me to be with her, just as much as I wanted to be with her, and that pleased me.

Although it took a lot of self restraint, I turned around and averted my gaze as she changed into her pajamas. When she finished, she grabbed my hand and pulled me into bed with her.

"You don't want to brush your teeth or face your face?" I asked.

"No, I'm too lazy. Let's just sleep," she mumbled, snuggling up to me. I quickly placed a thick blanket between us so that my cold body wouldn't make Bella freeze. She had shown amazing tolerance to my icy touch, but I wanted her to be as comfortable as possible.

"_You _sleep, I'll watch," I corrected.

"I love you," she whispered.

Warmth filled my body, which I didn't think was possible. This was the first time Bella had said these words to me. It didn't matter that she seemed half asleep at this confession. She told me she loved me! Bella inched closer, entwining her legs with mine, so that she was almost laying completely on top of me. Every inch of our bodies were touching.

"I love you, too," I replied, kissing her forehead. I wanted to do so much more, show her my love for her in more ways chaste kisses. Control, control, control, I repeated as my instincts battled within me.

As Bella drifted to sleep, I was filled with a feeling of bliss. But, with Bella, worry was never far from my mind. She seemed unusually tired, and suddenly so. And she was being affectionate and almost clingy. Her heartbeat had been a roller coaster the entire day, fast and slow, almost to the point that I expected her to faint. She left work early...

Was Bella _sick_?


	16. Chapter 16

There are many people I need to thank for contributing to shaping the storyline. Your ideas have been awesome! In particular I'd like to thank **luk1978, RedSoleSista**, **vampiregurl**,** helikesitheymikey**,** xXSakuraBlossomsXx**, **b4bystar**, **FangedLeaf **and** Felt With the Heart. **I have used their ideas in previous, current, or upcoming chapters.

Also, I went back and revised Carlisle and Edward's conversation in chapter 5 about humans and vampires mating. It actually is a family tradition, and not that unusual for the Cullens. There was a reader who pointed this out to me, but I forgot his/her name. If it was you, please remind me so I can give you credit.

Thanks for reading! Please review!

* * *

**BPOV**

"Bella? It's time to wake up..."

Edward's velvety voice whispered in my ear, waking me up.

"I made you breakfast in bed," he continued.

I yawned and opened my eyes. Edward was sitting on the bed, holding a tray, and smiling. My stomach filled with butterflies. I felt an urge to hug him, but the tray was in the way.

"Good morning," I greeted, wiping my eyes. "What time is it?"

"Early...6:30...I didn't know what time you wanted to wake up, but I thought perhaps you wanted to study before your exam this morning."

I raised my eyebrows. Normally I woke up naturally at least an hour earlier. 6:30 was sleeping late for me. I was glad Edward woke me up. I sat up in the bed and leaned against the headboard. Edward gently placed the tray in my lap.

"Scrambled eggs, toast and tea," he announced.

I looked down at the elegantly arranged meal, cutlery and napkin and then glanced back at Edward. He was waiting, eager to see if I was pleased. I picked up the tray and placed it to the side, then inched over to give Edward a hug. He welcomed me into his arms.

"Thank you," I said, inhaling his scent and squeezing him tightly. I felt as if I missed him terribly, since we had been separated by my sleeping for eight hours.

"You're welcome," he replied softly, but there seemed to be a hint of surprise in his voice. He placed his hand on my forehead, then smoothed back my hair. "How are you feeling this morning?"

I yawned again. "I slept well, but still feel kind of tired. I'm looking forward to our vacation."

At the thought of extended, uninterrupted time alone with Edward, my heart leapt and I tried not to blush. _Vacation_ wasn't really a word in my vocabulary, but, when Edward suggested it, I realized there was nothing else I wanted to do more. I couldn't even attempt to put up a fight or make excuses about responsibility. Alone. With him. My instincts immediately responded _Yes, please_. If he asked me to go away with him _forever_, I feared I wouldn't be able to resist. Thankfully, he was just asking for a week.

"Me, too," Edward replied, smiling with glee.

I hugged him again, feeling as though he couldn't be close enough to me. He rubbed my back.

"Do you want me to pack for you while you eat?" Edward asked, breaking away and starting to stand up. "You can tell me what you want to bring and I can put it in your suitcase..."

"No!" I protested, more at the absence of his touch than packing for me. I grabbed his hand and pulled him back into bed with me. "We can pack later...sit with me."

Edward was surprised, but obediently returned to me. He sat beside me and as I leaned against him, he put his arm around me. I picked up the tray and put it on my lap and began to eat breakfast. We chatted about the details of travel, deciding to leave immediately after class, and then he quizzed me on my exam.

"Did you read my textbook last night?" I asked with a smile. His questions were helpful, but almost word for word from my reading.

"I wanted to help you study," he admitted, with a shrug.

I sighed, my stomach filled with butterflies once again. I felt overwhelmed, but in a good way. When Edward wasn't annoying me, he was so..._amazing_. His thoughtfulness and care for me was unbelievable.

"Are you mad?" he asked, interrupting my sigh as frustration, which so far in our relationship, it had been.

I shook my head, sipping my tea. "No, not at all. I just feel _lucky_. You are so good to me."

Again, Edward seemed surprised, but he didn't say anything and only smiled. He looked thoughtful for a moment, then spoke.

"Did you know it's our anniversary? We met one week ago today."

I sipped my tea again to cover my smirk. I wondered if we would be one of those couples who celebrated every moment of our relationship. One week didn't seem worth of an anniversary, but it _had_ been the most intense week of my life. My feelings for Edward had been confusing and overwhelming. The more time I spent with him, the less confusing it felt, but the intensity didn't subside. In fact, it seemed to increase. The moment we met I felt connected to him and as the hours and days passed, the stronger that connection felt. Two days ago I was annoyed that he wouldn't let me go to another room without him, but this morning, the thought of him being out of my sight terrified _me_.

"Has it only been one week? It feels like I've known you forever..."

"The best week of my existence," Edward replied, confidently, leaning down to kiss my cheek. "I could stay in bed with you all day..." I immediately blushed at his words, thinking of how nice that would be. "...but we have to pack, get you dressed and to school and have less than an hour to do so."

I glanced at the bedside clock. I never forgot about the time, never, but this morning I wasn't thinking of it at all. Edward was right, I needed to start moving.

I yawned again, and thanked Edward for the breakfast. He took the tray as I scooted out of bed. I was in desperate need of a shower. It was a little complicated, living in a dry cabin without any indoor plumbing. On the first floor I had a small closet designed for showering with a water pump, shower hose, pot and propane unit to heat the water. I was embarrassed to realize I hadn't showered since Monday morning and probably smelled horribly. Maybe Edward _could_ pack for me, while I showered?

"Can I take you up on that offer to pack while I get ready for the day?" I asked. Rationally, it felt ridiculous to ask a man I just met to choose for me what I would take on vacation, but I felt like Edward and I shared the same brain sometimes. He would know what I liked.

He nodded. "Of course, I'm happy to help."

Unbelievably, even to me, I hugged him again. I didn't know why I was feeling especially affectionate this morning, but I couldn't help myself. Edward received me warmly and with obvious pleasure, so that helped to ease any embarrassment at my being so needy to touch him.

I grabbed a change of clothes and made my way downstairs to shower. I went as quickly as I could, anxious to be with Edward, and when I finished, brushed my teeth and blow dried my hair, I felt refreshed. Edward was standing in front of the door, waiting for me, and I leapt into his arms. Propriety normally told me to have some restraint, but with Edward I had very little. Increasingly, my instincts seemed to be overruling everything.

"You smell so good," Edward whispered, kissing my neck.

However natural it felt to be with Edward, I had to admit the difference in our species was never far from my mind. Vampire. Human. Supernatural. Normal.

"My blood really doesn't tempt you?" I asked. We hadn't revisited the long conversation we had about his nature. At that time he assured me he didn't desire to drain me, but he was a vampire. He thirsted for human blood, even if he chose to drink from animals.

"I certainly smell it and am aware of it, but I could never hurt you. With other humans, I _am_ tempted and that's why I have to be very careful and hunt regularly. Going away with you will be nice not only to be alone with you, but also to get a breather from...well, temptation."

I looked into his eyes, which had darkened. "Will going to my class be too difficult?" There would be at least a hundred people gathered into a small lecture hall.

Edward grinned. "I think I can handle it. I've had decades of practice being around humans. When we arrive in Denali, I'll hunt right away, though. I'm looking forward to some caribou."

I wrinkled my nose. "Sounds lovely."

He laughed at my response. "Your bag is on the sofa. I packed clothes, sweaters, unmentionables, anything else?"

I blushed a deep crimson, realizing Edward had packed my _underwear_. I wanted to disappear under the floorboards of the cabin. How _embarrassing_. I should have thought about that.

"Um, let me get my toiletries, and laptop," I mumbled awkwardly. "That should be it."

"Laptop? Are you going to _work_ on _vacation_?" Edward replied, admonishment in his tone, but I knew he was also teasing me.

"Um," I continued to feel awkward. "I don't know if I mentioned it, but I'm sort of writing a novel and..."

"You're writing a novel?" Edward interrupted. "Can I read it?" He looked genuinely excited.

I blushed again. "It's probably not very good. I've been working on it for awhile and my creative writing professor agreed to let me use it as my senior project. He's the only one who has read it, and only certain parts. I promise I won't be tied to my laptop, but I thought maybe I could work on it a little. I give you permission to stop me if I get obsessed with it." Which was certainly likely. My writing went through it's ups and downs, but when I was "in the zone" I could sometimes write hours without stopping.

"You didn't answer my question. Will you let me read it?"

"Edward!" I groaned. "What if you don't like it? I couldn't handle it."

For the first time since I met him, Edward rolled his eyes at me. Usually I was the one who did the eye rolling.

"I wouldn't like it...what a preposterous thought. Of course, I will like it. I'm sure it's brilliant." He was completely confident, but I was still wary.

"I'll think about it," I offered.

He shrugged. "Fair enough, I'm looking forward to reading it."

I rolled my eyes this time, at his taking my "I'll think about it" as a _yes_. I raised an eyebrow.

"My computer is password protected," I warned. "You won't be able to access it."

Edward smirked. "I won't read it without your permission, Bella."

"Okay," I replied suspiciously.

He lightly swatted me on the butt and I jumped. "Let's get the human to school, shall we?"

Playful Edward. I liked that. I pulled him in for a kiss on the lips and thought I would melt at his touch. However, this morning Edward was being the responsible one, and gently guided me in finishing packing. He helped me put on my coat and I picked up the backpack I used for school. I locked the door to the cabin and Edward carried my suitcase to the car.

Although I was increasingly losing any kind of resistance to Edward's wishes, I almost insisted on us taking the bus to the university, as if that proved my independence somehow. But, it would be faster and if we were leaving after my class, it made sense to drive, so I didn't try to protest.

We arrived on campus with time to spare. As we walked to class, Edward quizzed me again on key points from my reading. One of his arms was slung around my shoulder and with the other he held my hand. It was almost uncomfortable to walk, and when I paid closer attention, I realized Edward's body language was very tense. His tone of voice was neutral, but he was not his normal smiling, happy, relaxed self. As a couple of students passed by, he even glared at them, but I didn't say anything. Maybe the humans and their blood were tempting Edward more than he would admit.

Once in class, Edward walked to the front of the room to introduce himself to the professor. I waited in the back, in my usual seat. While the professor talked briefly with Edward, I noticed a group of girls gawking at him and whispering to each other. Jealously filled my body and my blood began to boil.

_Mine_, he's _mine_, I thought.

Jealousy was also immediately followed by self doubt. These girls were way prettier than I was. Why would Edward want to be with me when he could have any girl he wanted? Anxiety overwhelmed me at the thought of being separated from Edward. What if he left? What if he grew bored with me and wanted someone else? He had previously assured me of his love for me, but what if?

I put my head in my hands and tried to focus on breathing to calm down. Edward was immediately by my side.

"Are you alright?" he asked, full of concern, putting his hand on my back.

I straightened up. "I'm fine. Just worried about the exam."

Edward looked suspicious, but didn't press me further. "You'll do great," he assured me.

My eyes widened. "You didn't bribe the professor, did you?"

"Bella! I would never do that..."

I smirked. "Kidding, just kidding."

Edward smiled for the first time since we had been in public and relaxed, but only a fraction.

While I was taking the exam, Edward and I didn't hold hands, but he _did_ put his hand on my thigh. His touch was extremely arousing and distracting, but _not _touching me seemed to cause anxiety for both of us, so it was the only option. For the next forty-five minutes, I wrote and wrote and wrote, and when I was finished, I felt confident I had gotten a good grade on the essay exam. It was hard to concentrate when Edward was around, but he seemed to be a good luck charm, too.

I went to the front of the class to hand the professor the exam and was dismissed. Edward was waiting for me at the door and helped me put on my coat, as usual. A few student glanced our way and out of the corner of my eye, I could have sworn I saw Edward glaring at them. What was with the glaring? Why was he so annoyed or angry or tempted?

As we walked back to Edward's car, it occurred to me that Edward hadn't been home in days.

"Do we need to go to your house so that you can pack?" I asked.

He shook his head. "Everything I need is already at the cabin." He looked uncertain, as if he wanted to say more, but didn't.

"What?" I asked.

"Nothing."

"Edward," I scolded. "We're trying this "communication" thing, remember? What's up?"

"Would you mind if we stop by the hospital?" he blurted out.

"Are you sick?" I immediately asked, alarmed.

He laughed out loud, caught off guard, but then quickly returned to being serious. "No, _I'm_ not sick, but to be honest, I'm worried about _you_. You're much more tired than you were earlier this week, but you've gotten the same amount of sleep. Your heartbeat has been erratic, your body temperature is much warmer than normal..."

His obvious concern was endearing. He _did_ look truly worried for me, but I didn't think going to the _hospital _was called for. That seemed a little extreme.

"I'm fine," I urged him, softly, putting my hand on his cheek. "I'm human, our bodies do things like that, but that doesn't mean we need to go to _hospital_."

"We don't have to go to the emergency room. Carlisle can examen you. He also really wants to meet you."

"He does?"

"Of course. He wants to meet the woman who captured my heart."

For a brief second, I began to melt before realizing Edward was trying to dazzle me into saying yes. I raised an eyebrow and he smiled, realizing he had been caught. I didn't think I needed to go to the hospital, but I_ did_ want to meet Carlisle, especially after hearing so much about him.

"I also want to talk to him about _us_," he continued to admit. Edward rarely, if ever, looked bashful, but in that moment he did. I swallowed nervously. If Edward was thinking the same thing I was thinking, I knew what it was and I would be shy about mentioning it, too. Carlisle was a physician and also a vampire. He was equally educated and knowledgeable about vampires and humans.

Did he want to ask Carlisle about whether vampires and humans could have sex?

Edward mentioned he couldn't kiss me because of the venom in his mouth. But, what about other places? His perfect body couldn't be entirely poison. I wasn't on birth control because I had never even kissed a man before I met Edward, but there were other forms of protection...that could protect me from any...secretions.

I was inexperienced and to be honest, not very sexually aware, but my body hungered for Edward. Every kiss, every touch, made me desire him more. Because of our differences our physical relationship was limited, but Edward _did _say we would take it a day at a time. He didn't say _no_.

"I'd love to meet Carlisle," I replied with a smile. "Let's go to the hospital!"


	17. Chapter 17

**EPOV**

I expected it to take at least an hour of trying to convince Bella to go to the hospital and I wasn't going to take no for an answer, but surprisingly she agreed without much protest. She seemed to want to meet Carlisle as much as I wanted her to meet him and that pleased me. Carlisle was an important person in my life. He was my creator, mentor, friend, _father_. I hoped Bella liked him and would grow to trust and love him as much as I did. I worried that my protective instincts wouldn't allow Bella to be near Carlisle, he was a vampire after all, but I was making an intentional effort to be rational. Carlisle had a spotless record, he had never tasted human blood. He had more control than the members of our family combined. Bella would be safe with him.

Being in public with Bella was becoming increasingly difficult for me due to my concern for her safety. As we walked across campus, I had to stop myself several times from growling at human passers by. On one level I knew they were harmless, but on a deeper, instinctual level I saw them as a threat. My body was tense and ready to attack. It wasn't until Bella's class was over, and we were in the car, driving to the hospital, that I allowed myself to relax for a moment.

Once we arrived, Bella and I held hands as we walked to Carlisle's office, and the tension returned. I tried desperately to not let my body language reveal the protectiveness I felt, but Bella gave me several curious glances. I couldn't even smile and hoped that she was interrupting my behavior as a normal, human man nervous about introducing his girlfriend to his father, rather than the inhuman desires of a vampire who wanted to murder anyone who looked at his mate.

I was scanning the thoughts of those in the hospital and I immediately picked up on Carlisle's. He was in his office, waiting for us to arrive. Alice had warned him, and I would have to thank her for it later. But, Carlisle also had an unexpected guest, although I wasn't too surprised about it.

Lightly, I knocked on the door of Carlisle's office. He was at his desk, in his chair. Esme was sitting in his lap. When I opened the door, Esme jumped up before Bella could notice.

_Edward, don't be angry. I wanted to meet Bella. When Alice told me Carlisle would meet her today, I couldn't resist rushing over here._

I stood in the doorway cautiously. Esme was my loving mother, but she was also a deadly vampire who could easily kill Bella. I controlled my instincts, focusing on Esme's excitement.

_It's alright, son. We won't hurt her. Leave the door open if you feel you need to make a quick escape._

Carlisle wasn't being facetious. He could see my defensiveness and was suggesting a way for me to feel slightly more comfortable. Although I would easily smash through a closed door if I needed to get Bella to safety, having an _open_ door did slightly calm me.

"Carlisle, Esme, I'd like you to meet Bella," I greeted, entering the room and pulling Bella to my side.

Bella smiled shyly. "Hi, I've heard so much about you both."

Carlisle and Esme wanted to shake Bella's hand, but I subtly shook my head. I knew I was being ridiculous, but I didn't want anyone touching Bella but me.

"We're delighted to meet _you," _Carlisle responded warmly. "Alice told me your father is Charlie Swan, the police chief of Forks?" Bella nodded.

"Chief Swan is such a gentleman," Esme added. "Always so helpful and nice to our family."

"Did you visit Forks often?" Carlisle asked.

"A few times as a child, but not very often."

Carlisle, Esme and Bella continued with small talk about Forks and Bella's studies at UAF, while at the same time Carlisle and I began our own discussion. As vampires, our minds could process several things at once. I read Carlisle's mind and whispered my questions so quietly Bella couldn't hear.

_She's lovely. I'm so happy for you both._

"What is happening to me, Carlisle? I'm having a difficult time being rational. Instinct is overcoming me. I know you and Esme wouldn't hurt her, but I want to grab Bella and run."

_Your protectiveness for your mate is natural. I feel it for Esme._

"I was there when Esme first joined us. I read your mind. You never felt that _I _was a threat to her. When I was last at home, I almost attacked Jasper and Alice in fear of them hurting Bella."

_Bella is a human and she's fragile. Because of that you _will _feel much more protective._

"You and Rosalie weren't as obsessed with your mates as I am with Bella. The intensity is overwhelming."

Carlisle was thoughtful for a moment. Esme added her own thoughts to the conversation.

_Carlisle and I were obsessed with each other and still are, Edward. I'm sure every couple just expresses it differently. And believe it or not, we did try to guard our thoughts around you. _Esme inadvertently began to think about how excited she was that after all these years I had found someone to love. Her joy was overwhelming.

_The difference between me and Esme and Rosalie and Emmett and you and Bella is that Bella is human. Don't underestimate that difference. Although it seems to be a Cullen family tradition, it is not a natural occurrence for vampires to mate with humans. This is a personal question, so don't feel pressured to answer, but have the two of you had relations yet?_

With any other of my family members, I would have refused to discuss this topic and chosen to be a gentleman, out of respect for Bella. But, Carlisle was different. I knew I could talk to him about anything, without judgement.

"No, I didn't think it was possible."

Carlisle's mind was whirling with information, processing different connections. He formulated his thoughts. _Esme and I didn't consummate our relationship immediately, but it was only because she was a newborn and distracted by her bloodlust. It was the same with Rosalie and Emmett. However, it seems with other fully matured vampires that have mated, they consummate immediately after meeting. Since Bella is a human and you haven't consummated, until you do so you'll feel excessively and increasingly protective and possessive._

"I _want_ to consummate our relationship, believe me, I do. But, is it even possible? Wouldn't my venom affect her? What if my animalistic nature takes over and I crush her body?"

_All valid fears. I would suggest taking things slowly..._

"We have been taking things slowly." If I allowed myself to think about how much I wanted to express my love for Bella physically, and yet couldn't, I was overwhelmed with frustration.

_Let me be frank. You must be careful with your mouth, it is undeniably dangerous. But, if you're gentle and use a condom your secretions can be contained and not infect Bella._

Were Carlisle and I really having this conversation? His thoughts were purely medical and scientific, thankfully.

"Um...do you have any condoms?" I wasn't making a _decision_, I didn't want to presume that Bella was ready for that next step, but it wouldn't hurt to be prepared.

_No. But, I can get them for you before you leave._

Esme's eyes flashed and she looked at me. I wasn't a prude, but I saw Esme as my mother and talking about my sex life with her was not something with which I was comfortable. She was curious, but didn't want to impose.

_Alice sent me with a package for you._ _Perhaps it has what you need?_

I groaned. There were no secrets in our family, especially with a sister who could see the future. But, she _was _helpful.

"Thanks, Esme."

_Don't feel pressured to consummate your relationship with Bella. You need to be attentive to her human needs, particularly her emotional needs. But, I suspect consummating will make being with Bella easier on you. You'll always feel protective and possessive, but it will make being in public less stressful knowing she's completely yours._

The conversation was winding down and now that Carlisle had helped me understand my behavior, I needed him to examen Bella.

"I'm afraid there's something wrong with Bella. She tires easily, her body temperature has increased recently, and her heartbeat is erratic. She insists she's fine, but I'm concerned."

Although they thought that I could slightly be overreacting, it warmed me to see both Carlisle and Esme be concerned with Bella's health. I also felt a little guilty for talking about Bella without her knowing it, but I would tell her about my conversation with Carlisle later. She undoubtedly noticed something was going on beneath the surface of our general, pleasant conversation.

Esme opened her purse and placed the package Alice had sent on Carlisle's desk in such a subtle way that Bella didn't notice. _This is for you, dear. Have a wonderful time in Denali. When you return, please, please, please bring Bella home to see us. She's wonderful._

I smiled at Esme. Bella noticed me relax slightly and gave me a curious look.

"I have errands to run, but I'm so glad I was able to meet you in person Bella. I hope to see you again soon." _Please let me hug her, Edward._

Esme had been careful to not dwell on Bella's blood and so I cautiously gave my consent with a nod. I let go of Bella's hand and Esme immediately gave her a hug. _My new daughter,_ she thought with delight.

"It was nice to meet you too, Mrs. Cullen," Bella replied with a smile.

Esme frowned. "Call me _Esme_." _Or Mom._

"Esme." Bella repeated.

My mother smiled and turned to hug me. "Don't forget to call me, Edward. I worry when I don't hear from you."

"I will, Mom," I replied dutifully.

Bella looked surprised at my response, but covered it quickly.

Carlisle walked Esme to the door and gave her a kiss, and then she was gone. He missed her immediately, but was able to channel his thoughts to focus on me and Bella. I initiated the topic of her health.

"Carlisle, would you mind giving Bella a quick examination? I'm afraid that she's getting sick."

Bella rolled her eyes. "I'm fine. Edward says I worry too much, but I think he does, too."

I put my hand on her forehead. "You have a temperature." I neglected to tell Bella I graduated from medical school several times, but I doubted it would make much difference in her believing I was overreacting.

Carlisle nodded. "A fever usually indicates an infection. Let's indulge, Edward, shall we?" He winked and Bella and she smiled, relaxing.

_I'm going to have to touch her to examine her. Are you alright with this?_

I nodded. I would endure the tension if it meant finding out what was wrong with Bella.

"Let's go to an exam room." Carlisle instructed. I grabbed the package from Alice and put it in my pocket, as we followed Carlisle down the hall to an empty room. He greeted a few nurses, introducing us to them, and I put my arm around Bella protectively.

Once inside, Bella sat on the examination table, and I sat on a stool beside it, holding her hand.

"Thank you," I said, knowing Bella was being exceedingly generous in indulging my worry.

She squeezed my hand and shook her head in amusement. She opened her mouth so Carlisle could take her temperature.

"100 degrees. You _do_ have a fever."

I didn't say "I told you so" to Bella, but she looked at me as if she expected me to. I shrugged instead.

Carlisle asked her about her medical history, listened to her heart and lungs, checked her blood pressure, and reflexes. Bella didn't notice, but Carlisle was also _smelling_ her. The benefit of being a vampire who was a doctor meant that through scent he could pick up changes in the body that human doctors could not. Carlisle was being completely professional in examining Bella's body, which brought me comfort. Had he had any hint of attraction or arousal, I knew I would attack.

_Hormones are unusually high. Her breasts have swelled, heartbeat rapid, but steady. Ovulation is occurring. Fertile. _Carlisle's thoughts were rushing. He looked at me with his eyebrows raised.

_Bella is in _**heat**_._


	18. Chapter 18

**A/N:** has been having problems, but please don't give up on this story. If you get an alert about a chapter posting and it doesn't work, is probably working out it's kinks. Keep checking back until it works.

It was a productive weekend. I finished this story! (Almost.) I am SO EXCITED for you guys to read it. I'm not sure how often I'll post the remaining chapters, but reviews definitely give me incentive! :)

Thanks to **Felt with the Heart** and **IvoryHairBela** for their ideas for this chapter! Thanks to all the new people who have left reviews. And thank you for reading!

* * *

**EPOV**

Bella was in _heat_?

"Bella is not an animal, she's human. You cannot tell her that."

"Edward, did you say something?" Bella asked, noticing my lips moving.

I looked innocent and shook my head. "No."

_Of course, I won't, Edward. But you should talk to her about it. I suspect that mating with you is affecting her physically, much more than I could have imagined. Esme and Emmett were changed immediately after mating. I've never known of human and vampire mates co-existing together. The intensity of the situation is making her unwell._

I wasn't able to hide the look of concern on my face. I was making Bella sick? Thankfully, she didn't notice my panic, but Carlisle did.

_Consummating your relationship may help. Whether she realizes it or not, her body desires you. The mating bond will be official and the intensity will perhaps lessen for her physically. Or it will increase..._

Carlisle wasn't helping. Increase the intensity? I felt as if I was about to explode, I could only imagine how Bella must be feeling.

_Have you thought about changing her? Ultimately, that is the only solution. As an immortal, she will be your equal and in no danger of consequences of your bond._

Yes, I had thought endlessly about changing her. I wasn't opposed to it completely, but I didn't want to rob Bella of her humanity and her soul. My family made the most of our existence, yet most of us would not have chosen to become a vampire.

My father saw the conflict on my face and was compassionate. _Being alone with Bella for a week is a good decision. You'll relax knowing Bella is in complete safety and you can think about your options. There is no rush to make a decision._

"Bella, I am writing you a prescription," Carlisle announced.

"Am I really sick?" she asked.

"I'm writing a prescription for a _vacation_."

Bella smiled and looked at me. Carlisle was just as cheesy with his jokes as I was. Like father like son, I supposed.

"Although I haven't taken a blood sample or done x-rays, I believe you're simply exhausted. Your body needs rest."

_It's not a lie_, Carlisle thought to myself. _It's true._

She nodded. "I have been working a lot...for _years_."

"One week in Denali won't solve all your health issues, but I want you to make sure you're eating regularly and sleeping at least eight hours a day. If you can bear the cold, get fresh air and exercise. Have _fun_."

"Okay..."

"The fever is probably due to fatigue. Take Tylenol and it should subside." Carlisle turned to me. "Edward, do you feel better now?"

"Yes." _No._

Carlisle asked about our plans for the week, encouraged us to be safe, handed Bella a small bag of medication, and we were back in my car in the parking lot. I took the package out of my pocket and opened it.

"It's from Alice, apparently. She sent it to us via Esme."

I didn't want to embarrass Bella or make her feel pressured by pulling out a box of _condoms_, so I quickly put them under the seat and focused on the letter.

"She wishes us a Happy Thanksgiving and wanted us to know she stocked the refrigerator at our Denali cabin with a turkey and all the traditional side items. She insists that we celebrate properly, even if I don't eat."

"That was thoughtful of her," Bella remarked. "I _do_ like to cook. Too bad you can't eat it, though. What, how did Alice know we were going to Denali? You haven't talked to her and we just decided last night."

"It's convenient to have a sister who can read the future," I explained with a shrug. "Well, it can be incredibly annoying at times, but it's helpful, too."

"Ah," Bella replied, leaning back in her seat. I wondered if sometimes she forgot I and my family were vampires. So far, she'd adjusted to the news remarkably well. She didn't seem to treat me or the others as if we were anything but normal.

"How long is the drive to your cabin?" she asked.

"About five hours," I answered. "Shorter if you let me carry you while I run," I added wistfully. I loved to run and running with Bella would be extra special. But, temperatures would be below freezing and not easy for her to endure for more than a few minutes.

She smiled and I continued. "Don't worry, we won't run the entire way, but the cabin is rather remote. I will have to carry you for at least a few miles."

"I don't mind," she replied, squeezing my hand, and I was aroused at her touch.

We carried on a lively conversation while driving, but often Bella would get distracted by the scenery. Even in the darkness, the landscape was captivating. Bella shared about her childhood in Arizona, how the desert compared to Alaska.

It hadn't escaped my notice that Bella didn't often talk about her family and she rarely mentioned any friends. Her lack of friendships had to be her choice because she was a wonderful, caring, intelligent person. Her employers thought highly of her, her classmates had a good impression, and her ease and comfort in being sociable with my parents was outstanding. But, why would she choose to not have friends?

I was a loner myself, so on some level, I understood that many people preferred to be by themselves. But, I had my family. Bella didn't seem to have anyone. Neither Charlie or Renee called her during the week we were together. Even when I was away from the family, I talked to Carlisle and Esme every day, except since I met Bella. Instead of making my own assumptions, I decided to ask.

"Are you close to your parents?"

"No," she answered simply. "Carlisle and Esme are great," she added, focusing the attention off herself and on to me. "But, they're so _young_. I didn't expect that. When you called Esme _Mom_ it took me off guard."

"They are great," I agreed, "and I'm lucky to have them in my life. Physically they _are_ young, but their maturity and love for our family is beyond age. It's hard to explain, but they truly are like a father and mother to me."

"Do they give you an allowance, ground you or do parental stuff like that?"

I laughed. "No. Carlisle is the leader of our family and we respect his wisdom and advice, but we all make our own decisions. No one forces us to do something we don't want to do. Any of us could leave at any time. Free will, you know."

"Would you leave your family?" she asked.

"If you wanted me to, yes," I replied immediately. It was true. There was no doubt I had a bond with my family, but my bond to Bella was far greater.

Bella was visibly surprised. "I would never ask you to do that."

However, I _would_ ask Bella to leave her family. If she agreed to be changed into a vampire, that's what would happen. In a sense, she had already left her family. Without many friends, either, disappearing from society wouldn't be too difficult at all. It was selfish of me to think this way, but it made me happy.

"If I asked you to never see _your_ family again, would you?"

Confusion and panic flashed in Bella's eyes, then amusement. "Are you kidnapping me, Edward?"

I laughed. "I'd like to have you all to myself forever, but _my _family would be upset if I didn't share you with them." I watched the road for a moment and then glanced back at her. "Seriously, though. Would you?"

"Yes," she breathed, nervously. "I don't know why you would ask that, but I trust you completely."

Her vulnerability was precious. I wanted to stop the car and ravish her with kisses, but she would freeze to death by the combination of my cold body and the icy Alaskan winter. It occurred to me that we had yet to have the conversation about our future together. I didn't know whether she had considered the possibility of joining me as an immortal. The pain and torture she would have to endure made me nauseated to think about, but having her with me forever was what I wanted more than anything.

We drove in silence for awhile, holding one another's hand, subdued by the serious tone our conversation had taken. What if Bella refused to become a vampire? What if she was horrified by the idea of becoming one of us? She would eventually die and I would follow her into the afterlife immediately. I would ask the Volturi to execute me, my family would never agree to help me with that.

I drove the car as far as the weather and roads would allow, before parking it on the side of the road. Snow would eventually cover it and keep it from being towed away, but I would be able to find it easily. Bella put on her gloves and hat and bundled up, while I retrieved her bag from the trunk.

"Ready?" I asked, anxious to hold her in my arms.

"Um, would you mind if I rode piggy back style? I think it would make me less nauseous."

Before, I carried Bella in my arms as if she was my bride and that was how I planned to carry her again. However, traveling on my back wasn't a bad option either and it probably would be more comfortable for her.

I kneeled down. "Hop on!" I offered and she climbed cautiously on my back, putting her legs around my waist and arms looped around my neck. When she was secure, I picked up her bag.

"I'll start slow," I assured her.

"Thanks," she replied, a little shakily, her heartbeat increasing.

Through the snow covered forest, it was a good ten miles run to reach our cabin. There were no roads reaching it and building it had been a challenge, but the isolation it provided was priceless. Although we often stayed with our Denali cousins at their estate, which was much more established, this cabin was a family favorite, especially for the couples in the family. Now I understood why. No one would bother us here.

I tried not to run too fast, but I also didn't want Bella to be outside for too long, either. If Alice had already been to the cabin to deliver food for Bella, I trusted she had turned on the generator and lit the fireplaces. Our family had no need for warmth, of course, we were comfortable in any temperature, but in the unlikely event a human should visit the property, we still needed to keep up appearances. Thus, Esme insisted on designing the cabin with multiple fireplaces and a moderate-sized kitchen.

As the property came into view, Bella gasped.

"Are you alright?" I asked, slowly coming to a stop.

"You call this a _cabin_? This is more like a lodge. It's gigantic."

I laughed. "Yes, well, our family is large and we need our space. All our homes tend to be spacious. This is actually one of our smaller properties."

There was a lake in front of the cabin, which was occasionally used for seaplanes, a common mode of transportation in Alaska. The cabin itself was large, but simple. It had six bedrooms and bathrooms, a living room, and a kitchen. Beside the house was a small building that held ski equipment and several snowmobiles. As a family we had never spent an extended amount of time here, so there was no need for much else.

Bella remained on my back, as I tromped through the snow to the door of the cabin. I recognized Alice and Jasper's scent, faint, but recent, and the smell of burning firewood. She really had gone beyond the call of sisterly duty in helping me and Bella.

I glanced back at Bella. "Would you indulge me and allow me to do this?" Before she responded, I shifted her from my back to my arms, as I carried her across the threshold of the door. This was a tradition for newlywed couples, but it seemed appropriate. Bella and I were beginning our lives together.

In this cabin, I was going to make her completely mine.


	19. Chapter 19

**A/N: **Thank you to all the new people leaving reviews and for those of you who have been reading from the beginning and have awesome theories and ideas. This posting I'd like to thank **cfp33pfc** for a really creative idea and for **gredelina1** for pre-reading and helping shape the storyline.

Also, I must tell you – maybe you'll be disappointed or maybe you'll be happy, but there will be no pregnancy and no baby in this story! In this story I've really wanted to focus on the idea of mating and Bella and Edward's relationship. Some of you had really good ideas – you should use them and write your own story! I'll read it!

Warning. This chapter contains "Mature" content. _Lemons_.

**BPOV**

As soon as we entered the cabin, Edward wouldn't take his eyes off me. He was always attentive, but his gaze seemed to be more intense than usual, his touch filled with more meaning. _Smoldering_ would have been a good word to describe his eyes. It made me feel excited and nervous. Within five seconds of shedding our coats, we were in each other's arms.

Edward's kisses were gentle, but intentional, and he showed no signs of slowing down. We made our way to the living room, where I pulled him down to sit with me on a sofa. I jumped back, when out of the corner of my eye, I saw a blazing fireplace.

"Did you start that?" I asked, completely surprised.

"Alice did," Edward murmured, nuzzling his face in my neck and I shivered in pleasure.

My body grew rigid. "Is she here?" It's not that I didn't want to see her, but I thought we were going to be alone. I also didn't want her walking in and me and Edward making out.

Edward left a trail of kisses along my cheek until his mouth was on mine. "We're alone. She and Jasper were here to prepare the cabin for us, but then they left."

I relaxed. "Oh..." I sighed and returned my attention to Edward. I draped my arms around his neck and leaned back, drawing him on top of me. I felt every inch of his body against mine and my heart pounded. When I felt him hardened in arousal, my own core became enflamed.

"I love you," Edward whispered.

"I love you, too," I replied, noticing my body was trembling.

I felt like I could kiss Edward forever, and we did kiss for what felt like a very long time. His touch was heating me up, as if my body was boiling water. It kept getting hotter and hotter and hotter. Edward's hands were cupping my breasts, caressing my belly. Then they began to roam even further down my body. I felt him unbutton my jeans and his hand went beneath my underwear.

"Is this alright?" he asked, huskily.

I nodded, feeling too much pleasure to speak.

To be honest, I had never really explored myself before and wasn't sure what Edward was doing. His hand cupped me and his fingers began to massage the region. Edward locked eyes with me and when I turned my head to avoid his gaze, he used his free hand to bring my eyes back to his. His gentle, cold fingers touching me _there_ felt so personal, so intimate. Edward's eyes were filled with such love…and such desire. Touching me seemed to spark something within him. He was looking at me as he was never going to let me go.

When I trembled with pleasure and my breathing increased, he increased his speed. I moaned, and he increased even more. I clung to him, my eyes rolling back in pleasure.

For a brief, blissful few seconds, I wanted to live in the moment forever. As heat spread from my abdomen to where Edward was touching me, my back arched and I screamed out a guttural sound. Then, I collapsed back on the sofa, and Edward's hands were on my face and he was kissing me. He held me and rolled so that he was on his back and I was lying with my head on his chest.

"How did you know how to do that?" I asked weakly, my body reeling from pleasure. It seemed as though Edward had just given me an _orgasm_. He may have been just as sexual inexperienced as I was, but he was certainly knew what he was doing.

"I've been to medical school...and I read books," he replied, modestly. "But, I never thought I'd put this knowledge into practice."

"I'm glad you did," I sighed. "That was just...wow."

I felt like crying because despite the pleasure he gave me, it only left me yearning for more. I felt closer to Edward than ever, but, I felt vulnerable and sort of afraid that this was all too good to be true. I hugged him as tightly as I could and he hugged me back. I felt secure in his arms. My breathing calmed and before I realized it, I was deeply asleep.

When I woke up, I was in the most comfortable bed I had ever laid in before. Edward hadn't changed me, I was still fully dressed, except my boots were removed. He wasn't with me, which surprised me and made me nervous.

"Edward?" I whispered. The room was dark, but there was a light on in the adjoining bathroom.

Within two seconds, I felt the bed move and Edward was by side. I gasped with surprise, as I always did when he moved so quickly. He brushed a strand of hair behind my ear.

"Where did you go?" I asked.

"I was making you dinner. You've only been sleeping for a couple of hours. Tired from the drive, I'm sure."

I blushed. Also tired from _other_ things.

"Are you hungry?"

I nodded. "Starving, actually."

Edward scooped me up in his arms. He rubbed his nose against mine and I giggled. As he led me to the kitchen, I noticed he had a candle light dinner prepared for us, except I was the only one with a plate of food. He placed me in the chair, kissed my cheek, then sat across from me.

"Bon ape tit," he greeted.

I smiled and began to eat. It was a simple meal, chicken and vegetables, but it was _very_ good.

"For someone who doesn't eat, you're a very good cook," I remarked between mouthfuls.

"Thanks. I looked up the recipe online, but I had no idea if I was preparing it correctly. It doesn't smell very appetizing to me."

"Oh, I'm sorry," I replied, feeling guilty he had to put up with my human-ness.

He shook his head. "Don't be sorry. _You_ smell delicious."

My eyes widened and he winked. He may not want to drink my blood, but he was still aware of it. A reminder to me that as similar as I felt like we were, we were not the same.

"When will _you_ eat?"

Edward looked thoughtful. "I was thinking of hunting tonight, while you slept. I don't want to leave you, but it's too cold for you to join me for an extended period."

"Extended period?" I repeated. How long did he have to be gone when he hunted?

He squeezed my hand. "I won't be gone long, just a few hours. You won't even realize I'm gone."

I tried not to show my disappointment, but it was hard. Edward noticed my forced smile.

"An _hour_," he clarified. "I'll only be gone an hour."

I sighed in relief. "Good. Would you go while I'm awake? I sleep better when I know that you're with me."

He nodded. "Of course. Whatever you wish."

We talked while I ate and decided he would hunt after dinner. I would spend the time writing and when he returned we would watch a movie. He insisted on washing the dishes when I finished dinner, and I sat on the counter watching him work, feeling a little in awe at the perfect man standing before me. I walked him to the door and he lingered before leaving, kissing me passionately, leaving me breathless.

When he disappeared into the night, I missed him desperately.


	20. Chapter 20

A/N: Since my chapters are short, I will try to post a chapter every day until the story is finished. Please reward me with reviews. Would you make my dreams come true and help this story get past the 1,000 review mark?

Thanks for reading!

* * *

**EPOV**

Hunting without Bella was a ridiculous idea. As soon as I left her, my body felt like it had been torn into pieces. But, I couldn't very well have her with me in a blizzard and below freezing temperatures. She was comfortable, well fed and safe. I was staying within a few miles of the cabin in order to monitor any human or vampire thoughts that might come on my radar. It was silent and that made me feel better, but not by much. I missed her. Yet, I needed to hunt. The bear I drained a weak earlier did not satisfy my appetite. If I overindulged that evening, I would be well fed for a solid two weeks before needing to hunt again.

Although I didn't desire her blood, being well fed also helped my self control. It was my instinct and intention to take Bella and claim her as mine as soon as we entered the cabin. Thankfully, the shreds of my humanity shouted at me to pay attention. I knew I needed to take our relationship to the next level, but making love to her in such a rush wouldn't have been ideal. Bella deserved romance. She deserved to be wooed.

So, I compromised with my animalistic self. Instead of going all the way, I went _half _way. It pleased me to please Bella. She felt good and I was surprised at my control, although as soon as she was asleep I had to go to the bathroom and take care of my own needs. The act seemed to forge a deeper bond between us, if that was possible. My existence felt fragile and unstoppable all at the same time.

I focused on quenching my thirst and didn't attempt to play with my food, which I normally did when hunting with my brothers. Caribou and deer were abundant and I drank until I couldn't contain another drop. I looked at my watch. It took less than an hour. I would return to Bella early.

My beautiful human was asleep on the sofa, computer in her lap, when I returned. I was tempted to read what she had been writing, but I didn't want her to feel betrayed. I picked up the laptop, clicked to save the document, then closed it and placed it on a side table.

"Bella, love, I'm home," I whispered, kneeling next to her. It had been a long day, perhaps she needed to remain sleeping.

She woke, looking confused, and sat up quickly. She was so adorable half asleep.

"You're home!" she repeated and reached out for me. I stood and scooped her up so that she was sitting in my lap. I smoothed her hair.

"Do you want to go to bed instead of watching a movie?" I asked. It didn't matter to me either way. Whether it was sleeping or a movie, I'd still be watching _her_.

"Can we watch a movie in bed?" she asked, yawning.

"Your wish is my command," I replied, picking her up and carrying her up the stairs. I seemed to be carrying Bella often, and wondered if it annoyed her. I knew she was capable of walking, but I loved holding her in my arms.

We returned to my suite, which luckily was the only bedroom amongst our family properties that actually had a bed.

"Do you want to get changed for bed while I set things up for us? I put your bag in the bathroom."

Bella nodded, gave me a kiss on the cheek, and I set her down. I watched her walk to the bathroom, then within the next minute set up a 58" plasma TV and dvd player at the foot of the bed. I didn't actually watch a lot of television or movies normally, and there wasn't one in my suite, but I borrowed both from Rosalie and Emmett's room. By the time Bella finished changing, I was sitting on the bed waiting for her to return to me.

Bella emerged from the bathroom in her pajamas, her hair brushed and she was smelling extra nice. She was fully awake now and looked a little nervous. I opened my arms to welcome her, but she looked at me curiously.

"You're not changing?" she asked.

I looked down at my clothes and shoes, confused.

"You have pajamas, right?"

"Well, I don't sleep...so no, I actually _don't_ have any pajamas."

"Oh." Bella was displeased.

"Do you want me to change?"

"No, it's okay. I just want you to be comfortable."

I wanted to tell her that I was comfortable no matter what I wore. If she wanted me to change, I'd prefer to be _nude, _but that might intimidate her. She was wearing the nightgown I loved so much and I was wearing jeans and sweater, my boots laced up tightly. I could understand why she didn't think I was comfortable, compared to what she was wearing.

I stood up. "Just give me _one _second."

I ran to Jasper and Alice's room and borrowed a pair of Jasper's sweatpants, since we were close to the same size. I tore off my sweater and left on my white undershirt. I took off my boots, but left on my socks. When I returned to present myself to Bella, she greeted me with her mouth open in shock.

"What? Am I wearing the wrong thing?"

Bella swallowed and seemed to stutter. "N...No...tha...that's perfect. You look nice."

"Thanks," I replied with a grin, walking towards her.

"But, you did take longer than one second...more like _five_ seconds," she teased, recovering from whatever had stunned her.

I squeezed her behind, and drew her close to me. "Don't be a smart alec," I cautioned.

She grinned and hugged me, then took my hand and led me to the bed.

"So, what movie are we watching?" she asked.

I turned on the television and DVD player, which had over 300 movies in it's memory.

"We have scary, comedy, drama, romantic, adventure...this is Emmett's DVD system and he has quite a variety to choose from."

"Adventure would be good. What do you have?"

I scrolled down the list. At the same time we both said out loud, "Indiana Jones."

We laughed. "Temple of Doom or Raiders of the Lost Ark?" I asked.

"Temple of Doom," we both answered again at the same time.

Bella lightly tapped my arm. "And you said you couldn't read my mind."

"I can't! Honestly. Great minds just think alike..."

I ran to turn off the lights, then returned to the bed and pressed play to start the movie. I wrapped an extra blanket around Bella before she snuggled up against me, to ensure she would remain warm against my cold body.

Together, we watched the movie, laughing at the same parts, quoting the same lines.

This is what it feels to be human, I thought to myself. Wearing pajamas, watching a movie in bed, cuddling with the woman with whom I wanted to spend the rest of my existence.

This is what it feels like to be in _love_.


	21. Chapter 21

**A/N**: Only 100 reviews until we reach the 1,000 review mark! Please review!

**BPOV**

I was enjoying my time with Edward more than I thought possible. Being with him made me happy, being _alone_ with him made me even more happy. I felt a sense of freedom not having to go to class, do homework or go to work. My solitary, independent life seemed to have disappeared and now my life was fused to Edward. Our worlds revolved around one another. Things would be different when we returned to Fairbanks, I knew this without a doubt.

We had been in Denali for several days and my relationship with Edward had physically progressed, much to my delight. Kisses, while still close mouthed, were placed _everywhere. _Clothing had begun to be removed. Caresses and gentle touches were given in delicate areas. Edward even started giving me full body massages, which made me relax to an almost zombie like level. It all felt natural and right, I felt safe and comfortable with Edward, but we had yet to go all the way. We both seemed to be pushing the boundaries and I hoped and expected that all this build up was leading to something.

Every moment wasn't spent in one another's arms, although a good deal of time was devoted to that. We also had other fun, watching movies, reading together, playing cards (Edward couldn't cheat because he couldn't read my mind), a few times we took the snowmobile for a spin and Edward let me drive. I was even able to write, not for a school deadline, but for my own pleasure. Edward played the piano while I finished a chapter and it was inspiring.

On Thanksgiving we cooked together and Edward insisted on setting the table as if a dozen people were coming over for dinner. He didn't eat, of course, but it was still very special. In the evening I called Renee and Charlie to check in, it was tradition to call on holidays and birthdays. Renee noticed an excited, happy tone in my voice, but I didn't mention I was celebrating Thanksgiving in a cabin deep in the woods with a man I just met. Charlie wasn't home, probably at La Push with his friends, so I left a message.

I felt a little melancholy after talking and _not _talking to my parents. It was hard not to compare them to Carlisle and Esme. While they were gorgeous, young looking, adoptive parents and_ vampires_, there was still an undeniable closeness between them and Edward. I noticed the love they showed him when we met, in the way they spoke to him and looked at him with pride. I knew my parents loved me, but they had never looked at me _that_ way. I rarely spent time with my parents, but Edward had a dozen stories about the quirks of Carlisle's personality or special times he'd had alone with Esme.

While Edward cleaned up the kitchen, I sat in a chair, thinking of these things, while watching the snow fall outside. Completely distracted, I didn't notice that Edward was finished until he came up behind me and kissed my neck. Warmth spread throughout my body at his touch and I craved more of him, but my brain didn't follow. Edward instantly noticed I wasn't responding and kneeled in front of me, putting his hands on my thighs and leaning his head against mine.

"What's wrong?" he asked.

"Nothing's wrong. I was just thinking of your family. Carlisle and Esme – they're really nice."

He nodded and paused. "I want them to be _your _family, too."

I blushed. Was he referring to _marriage_? I wanted to be with Edward for as long as I lived, but the idea of getting married was not appealing in any way. Renee and Charlie married young and it crashed and burned.

"I don't want to get married," I confessed, awkwardly. I hoped I didn't hurt his feelings, but I didn't want to presume he was thinking of marriage if he wasn't.

"_I _want to marry _you_," Edward responded. "But, I'll wait until you're ready..._if _you're ever ready."

Edward wanted to marry me? Wow. I blushed again in surprise. "And if I never want to be married? Would you leave?"

He looked offended and took my hands into his. "I will never leave you, Bella, whether you want to be married not. I don't need a _wedding_ _ceremony_ to commit myself to you, I'm already tied to you, til death do us part."

His words should have been comforting, but they only caused my eyes to fill with tears.

"That's the thing – I _will_ die one day...and you won't. I can't bear the idea of being separated from you, even by death."

It was sudden and irrational, but my emotions were real and strong. Edward was immortal and I was not. I could enjoy these moments we were sharing, but one day he wouldn't be with me anymore.

The thought made me inconsolable.

Edward picked me up and carried me to bed. I curled up into a ball and he held me until I calmed down.

"How embarrassing, I'm sorry for being such a mess," I whispered quietly, my voice hoarse from crying.

"If I could cry I would express myself the same way as you did at the thought of us being separated. It's my greatest fear."

Edward was being too nice. I was sure he didn't feel the same way I did. I rolled over so that we faced one another.

"I'm being sensitive...I think I'm PMSing," I explained dismissively.

Edward's eyes raised in surprise and I wondered if I offended him by talking about my period. It was crude to admit, but if Edward and I were going to get more physical, I hoped it was before I started. Otherwise, I didn't know how that would work, especially with a partner who was a vampire that thirsted for blood. Even though he told me I wasn't a temptation, I didn't want to make him uncomfortable. Also, wouldn't it be messy?

"You're aware that you're ovulating?" he asked, almost clinically.

I was confused by the question. "Um...I guess? I don't always keep track of it, but I sort of just know when it's around that time."

"Hmm...Carlisle sort of mentioned that you were, so I'm surprised..."

I was mortified. "Carlisle knew I was about to start my period and told you? What? First of all, that is so embarrassing, and second of all, uh...why?"

Edward now looked embarrassed. "He told me to talk to you about it, but the timing hasn't been right. Along with a need for rest, it was also another explanation of your symptoms – fatigue, heartbeat, temperature..."

"Okay, but why would he tell you? This must happen to me every month, it's normal for human women."

Edward seemed to search for the right words. "It's more complicated than that because of our relationship...we're not the same species and I was afraid of how physically that would affect you."

Oh. Edward _did_ ask Carlisle about sex and I didn't even notice. How did I miss that?

Now _I _was searching for the right words. "And did he say if it was okay if we..."

Ugh. How could I be ready to have sex if I wasn't ready to say the word out loud?

Edward smiled shyly. "Carlisle gave me some technical advice...and Alice gave me some protection."

I blushed yet again. I knew there wasn't anything to be ashamed about, but Edward getting advice on sex from his father and condoms from his sister was just unexpected. They were definitely a very close family. Butterflies of excitement filled my stomach.

"So are we going to try?" I asked quietly.

"If you want to, yes."

There was an awkward pause as we stared at one another in silence.

"I _do_," I whispered. "Do you?"

"Yes," Edward groaned, his eyes ablaze with passion.

I swallowed nervously. Edward wanted me and I wanted him. My heart began to beat wildly. Edward pressed his hand against my chest, which only made it thump harder, and leaned in to kiss me.


	22. Chapter 22

**A/N:** Warning. MATURE content. Lemons.

"Do you want to prepare for bed?" he whispered, and I felt his breath against my lips.

"Yes," I sighed. It was finally happening and I was completely ready for it.

Edward helped me off the bed and I walked into the bathroom and shut the door. Trying not to squeal with anticipation, I quickly undressed and put on my nightgown. I chose to leave my underwear _off_, which made me blush even though I was alone. I needed to get over the embarrassment. I was about to have sex with the man I loved!

I brushed my hair, washed my face and brushed my teeth. I looked at myself in the mirror, knowing that after this night, everything would be different.

Slowly, I opened the bathroom door and saw the bedroom illuminated with candles. Edward was waiting for me in bed and his shirt was off. I paused for a moment, taking in his beauty and perfection, and Edward stood up and walked towards me. My eyes widened and I had to bite my lip to stop from gasping. He was completely naked and he was..._huge_.

Edward caressed my cheek and leaned in to kiss me. I felt him harden and looked down to see him fully aroused. Although I had touched it before, I had never _seen_ his erection. It was a little intimidating, to be honest. But, I appreciated the fact that Edward was the one who took initiative, who exposed his self completely to me first.

He lifted me into his arms and carried me to bed. My heart was pounding as he crawled on the bed to place me in the center. He put his hands on my waist and touched the hem of my nightgown. Edward looked at me as if he was asking permission and I nodded. I raised my hands as he pulled it off of me. For a moment, we sat staring at one another, both of us completely naked. I felt vulnerable, nervous, excited and completely turned on.

I leaned back and Edward straddled my torso, taking a long look at my body.

"You're so beautiful," he whispered. I smiled shyly, not knowing how to respond.

He began a trail of kisses from my abdomen, to my belly, my breasts and neck, until he reached my mouth. My body was on fire from the sensation of his cold lips touching my warm skin. I tangled my hands in his hair, then rubbed them along his shoulder blades and responded with my own kisses. I had learned he liked to especially be kissed behind his ear, so I started there first. He moaned in pleasure and I licked and sucked on his neck, running my hands along his perfectly chiseled chest.

"I love you so much," I moaned, feeling overwhelmed with devotion. Never in my wildest dreams did I think I would be experiencing such an intimate act with such a wonderful and complex man.

"I love you," he responded, as his hands found my nether regions. I gasped. Edward had been more than generous in pleasuring me. This night was for him as well.

"I want to pleasure _you_," I offered, reaching down to touch him.

Edward seemed to be in deep concentration. "You first...then me," he breathed.

I nodded and leaned my head back, putting my hands in his hair, as he kissed my breasts and worked magic with his fingers. After I orgasmed several times and was exhausted with bliss, Edward pulled himself up and looked directly into my eyes.

"Are you ready?" he asked.

I nodded vigorously. Although a man had never been inside me, instinct was screaming for Edward to enter me _now_.

He sat back and in a blur I saw him touching himself. Was he...?

"For protection," he leaned down and whispered into my ear. I nodded and braced myself for impact. I was moist and ready.

My body was trembling with desire as he entered me. He was gentle and slow and it wasn't as uncomfortable as I expected. Maybe all the pleasuring Edward had given me with his fingers had prepared my body for his entry. It was tight, but it was right.

I didn't expect the moment to be so emotional. I closed my eyes and held back my tears as Edward began to move in and out of me. He grunted...I arched my back in pleasure as his tip hit a spot inside me that made me shake with excitement. Our breathing increased and we both panted heavily. Then tension began to build and build, each thrust bringing me more and more pleasure. I met his thrusts with my own, and our eyes locked. It was the most intimate moment of my entire life.

My eyes rolled back and I couldn't see, hear or think about anything. Edward gave out a loud and long groan and then collapsed on top of me.

Within half a second, he rolled over to the other side of the bed, and I felt his absence like a punch in the stomach immediately. But, he quickly returned, pulling me on top of him. I laid my head on his chest, as he held me.

"Sorry that was so..._fast_," he apologized.

"It was _wonderful_," I breathed. "We did it...I'm still alive."

I heard his chest rubble with a laugh. "Yes, we did. I love you, Bella. This is only the beginning."

I was exhausted, but still very much full of desire. I craved Edward and our intimacy only made me hunger for him more.

"Can we try again?" I asked shyly.

Edward looked at me with surprise. "Are you sure? You're not too tired?"

"No, I'm _ready_."

A mischievous smile covered his face and he rolled us over, so that he was on top of me again. He kneaded my breasts and pressed his pelvis against mine. I moaned with desire. I didn't need the foreplay. I needed him in me...immediately.

My hands grasped for his member and I sat up a bit, so that we were aligned, and I guided him into me. He felt like home. I wrapped my legs around his waist and pushed my torso up, so that I could feel him go deep inside me. Edward smiled in pleasure, as he held my waist and looked at me with love and awe.

Then something happened.

Although, he remained inside me, Edward's eyes glazed over and the butterscotch color turned to dark black. For the first time since meeting Edward, I became deathly afraid.

"Edward," I stammered. "What's wrong?"


	23. Chapter 23

**A/N:** Thanks for making my dream come true! 1,000 reviews! Yay! As a reward to all you faithful, supportive readers, I'm posting this chapter early. Thanks for reading!

* * *

Did Edward forget to wear a condom? I lifted my head and recognized he _was_ wearing one. If that wasn't the problem then, why was he frozen like a statue?

"Edward?" I whispered, trying not to panic.

His eyes flashed, but they remained black. He pulled out of me and scooped me up in his arms in a blur. I grew dizzy from the quick movement. He cradled my naked body against his and began to growl. It was deep and loud and when I looked into his eyes, it wasn't the Edward I recognized. The man holding me was fully a vampire...fully a _monster_.

My heart pounded. Edward was holding me gently, almost protectively. I realized that he thought I was in danger. His eyes moved back and forth wildly, focusing on something I could not see. The muscles in his body seemed to have expanded, they were flexed and alert. He roared and I covered my ears with my hands. I was scared.

For a moment, his humanity seemed to return. He carried me to the bathroom and quickly dressed me, even putting on my shoes by himself before I even realized what he was doing. He was so quick, it only took a few seconds. Then, he carried me to his closet and he dressed in a blur. The whole time, I tried to make eye contact with him, tried to get him to speak to me, but he was silent. After we were both dressed, he carried me to the living room. His body remained tense and a growl repeatedly rumbled through his chest.

Was he taking me somewhere? He seemed to be deciding. But, we didn't leave. He placed me in a chair against a wall in a corner and stood in front of me, his arms crossed, like a prison guard. The cell phone in his pocket started to ring, but he didn't answer it and he didn't respond to my insistence that he answer it. After a minute of it ringing nonstop, I reached forward and carefully took the phone of out Edward's pocket and looked at the caller Id. _Jasper._ Edward's brother.

"Hello?" I answered shakily.

"Bella?" the male voice asked, surprised. "Where is Edward?"

I was on the verge of tears. "Um...he's right here...but he's kind of_ freaked out_. I don't know what's happening to him."

"This is Jasper. Can I talk to him?"

"I don't think he will...he won't talk to me at all. I don't understand, why is he acting this way?"

Jasper sighed. "Damn, I was right," he muttered to himself. "In a few minutes, maybe sooner, you'll have visitors. Stay where Edward has put you and _don't move_. Whatever happens, don't move, okay?"

I started to panic. "What? What are you talking about? Visitors? Don't move? Are we in danger?"

"My family and I will be there as soon as we can. Edward will protect you. Everything will be alright."

I was silent. "Bella? Everything will be alright." Jasper repeated his words, trying to calm me down.

"Okay."

"Now repeat what I just told you."

"Whatever happens, _don't_ move."

"Correct. We'll see you soon Bella. Be safe."

Click. The line went dead.

Be _safe_? What did _that_ mean?

I stood up and hugged Edward from behind, leaning my head against his back. Touching him calmed me down slightly, but adrenaline was still racing through my system. I heard a door open and electricity filled the air.

I peaked out from behind Edward and saw three vampires standing before us.


	24. Chapter 24

**A/N:** Sorry for the cliffhangers. They are basically how I structure a story and I know it's cruel. But, at least I update often.

This story will be finished **very** **soon**, I think. Maybe only one more long chapter or a couple of shorter ones. Thus, I wanted to thank some long time readers and reviewers for their support and feedback. Special thanks to gredlina1, IThinkINeededThat, Pianogirl05, xXSakuraBlossomsXx, aerobee82, Sonja Cullens, traceybuie, mikey1048, helikesitheymikey, sogian, melissamary55, danimcket, Shyna Mends, GothMisfitFreak, LordXeenTheGreat, Felt With the Heart, favludo, VampireandWerewolfLover1994, rosaliehale1994 and many others (sorry if I forgot anyone)!

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There were three vampires standing before us.

I knew they were _vampires_ because their eyes were blood red. I shivered in fear because blood red eyes indicated they weren't like my Edward who drank from animals. These were the type of vampires who drained _humans._

The three vampires before us were two men and a woman. They looked past Edward to stare directly at me, their expressions full of curiosity and excitement.

I clung to Edward. His body was tense and I wondered if I should sit back down, but I was too nervous to let go of him.

"Tanya was right….you _do _have a human pet. Are you going to share?" the dark skinned one asked, chuckling.

Edward growled and the vampire looked surprised. He glanced at the man standing to his left.

"If you don't leave now, I will kill you," Edward replied. The calmness with which he spoke did not match the rigidity of his body. "I will kill_ all _of you."

The dark skinned vampire raised his hands. "I was misinformed. And I do not wish to fight." He glanced at me with a look of disappointment and Edward hissed. The sound was jungle cat – fierce and protective. "We will leave," he added, trying to appease Edward, taking a step backwards.

The other man and woman remained standing, not as intimidated by Edward as the first vampire.

"She _is_ mouth watering…." the man remarked, "I understand the attraction…"

The woman giggled and wrapped her arm around the man's waist. They were a couple, obviously.

"James, let's _go_," the vampire commanded, continuing to take steps back, not turning his back to Edward. "He's not going to share…and do you really want to start a war with his coven?"

James shrugged. "I'm not going anywhere, Laurent."

The one called Laurent looked at Edward, repeated his words from earlier, "I was misinformed….I do not wish to fight" and then disappeared in a blur.

"Your coven isn't here with you now," James taunted Edward. "It's two against one….Victoria and I want her."

Edward growled and I was suddenly hugging the air. Terrified, I inched back into the chair behind me. Jasper told me not to move. Even though my instincts were telling me to run, I decided to do what Jasper said. Somehow, he knew this would happen and I chose to trust that he would know how I could stay safe during a vampire attack.

The scene unfolding in front of me was hard to decipher. It was a blur of quick movement. Edward lunged at James and threw him across the room, smashing into the kitchen counters. The woman ran towards me, but Edward caught her and tore off her arm in the process. I closed my eyes in fear and covered my ears. The booming sounds were like the colliding of boulders or granite cracking. It was overwhelming. I was worried for Edward, not sure how he would defend himself and me against two ferocious vampires. I felt so helpless. Was this the end for us both? How would we survive?

I heard the crash of glass and opened my eyes to see Laurent at my side. He hadn't really left. I screamed.

"Edward!"

It happened so quickly. I looked at Edward, he looked at me, and Laurent grabbed my hand. There was a flash of red hair and I felt razors plunge into my arm. Excruciating pain broke my gaze with Edward and I glanced at the source of my pain.

Victoria was sucking my blood.


	25. Chapter 25

I struggled to maintain consciousness as I felt life drain from me. My eyes rolled back and I collapsed as I heard the sound of thunder. It was followed by screaming…my own, but also the screams of others.

I starred up at the ceiling and realized Victoria no longer had her teeth in me. Writhing in pain, my blood feeling like it was boiling, I desperately hoped Edward had made his escape. It was too late for _me_, but not too late for him.

I was alone, but something was happening around me. I heard odd sounds – stone being chiseled, glass breaking, snapping, and breaking. It was hard to describe, but the screaming stopped and there was silence.

My heart pounded and I began to cry. Was Edward safe? Were the others coming to finish me off?

Someone was holding me in their arms. It hurt to be moved and I cringed in pain. A hand stroked my face and I looked up. Edward!

"You're….alive…." I managed to mumble. The boiling feeling in my veins made it hard to speak.

His beautiful face calmed me slightly, although his eyes were still black and fierce. He didn't say anything, but paused for a moment to look at me. Then, he kissed me on the cheek and began to walk towards the demolished kitchen. He reached in a drawer and got a box of matches, then carried me to the center of the living room. On the floor laid a pile of dismembered body parts. I saw arms, legs, and the detached heads of James, Laurent and the one who had bitten me, Victoria. I was in too much pain to scream, but I was terrified at the sight. It was horrific. Edward had done this? All by himself?

Edward lit a match and tossed it into the pile. It immediately ignited into a roaring fire– the body parts seemingly very flammable. Satisfied when every piece was burning, Edward grunted. Despite a coma like state threatening to overtake me, I had enough rational thought to realize that Edward was not only burning these vampires, but he was also burning down the entire house. He took me upstairs to his bedroom and I felt panic. We needed to leave – the house would soon be on fire!

But, we didn't stay long. In a blur, Edward wrapped me in a blanket, maybe several blankets, and then with me in his arms, jumped out the window and began to run. I had no idea where we were going. My eyes were open, but I was as limp as a rag doll, not being able to speak or move at all. While Edward was running, I groaned in agony several times, and each time I did Edward would kiss me on the forehead. His touch did not bring relief.

I lost my sense of time, but I noticed when Edward stopped running and we were in front of a lodge. It looked like a hotel, but there was no driveway, no cars. He laid me on a bench on the porch, kissed me fully on the lips, then left. I began to cry at his absence. Why was he leaving me?

In the distance I heard friendly chatter, then silence, and the same sound of snapping and breaking I heard earlier. Screaming and yelling began and within a second I was in Edward's arms and he was running again.

The burning feeling in my veins started slowly, but now it was a raging fire. I closed my eyes and wished for death.


	26. Chapter 26

**A/N:** Okay, so there will be a few more chapters than I originally planned! Also, I'm sorry that for the last couple of chapters I haven't been responding to reviews. I figured you'd rather I write and post chapters. :) I'm so happy most of you are enjoying the story! Thanks for all the reviews!

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**Jasper's POV** (Are you surprised?)

Alice insisted we visit our "cousins" for the Thanksgiving holiday. She loved any excuse to celebrate or have a party, so I indulged her. I enjoyed spending time with Eleazar and Carmen, as well as Tanya, Kate and Irnia. There was always interesting conversation and the comfort of being with others of our kind who followed our "vegetarian" diet. Not wanting to miss out on the fun, Emmett volunteered on coming with us, along with Rosalie who had no objections. Being out of the house also gave our adoptive parents, Carlisle and Esme, time to be alone, which all couples in the family appreciated.

As soon as we arrived at the lodge, the four of us tensed, picking up the scent of three unfamiliar vampires. My years of war in the South, fighting other vampires for territory, made it difficult for me to trust any vampires other than my mate. It took years to fully trust the Cullens, then even more years to trust the Denali clan. But, it was also a natural reaction for a vampire to be cautious when meeting other vampires. You never knew what would happen.

Slowly, we approached the front door. It opened and Kate and Tanya were saying goodbye to three vampires – two men and a woman. They were definitely nomads, blood red eyes, tattered clothing, barefoot. A breeze brought our scent their way and one of the men snapped his head in our direction. I squeezed Alice's hand, ready to fight if need be.

The man stared at Alice, strong emotions of surprise and amazement overcoming him. He hid it well, however, and turned his attention back to the conversation the other man and Kate were having.

"Our cousins are here!" Tanya announced. "Welcome! Our visitors were just leaving, but let me introduce you."

Emmett glanced at me. He was the friendliest and most easy going of all our family, but even he detected something untrustworthy about this trio. I nodded quickly, acknowledging that it was okay to approach. I sent a wave of calm towards the nomads, carefully gauging their emotions.

Tanya introduced Laurent, James and Victoria. I did not like the fascination and possessiveness James was feeling towards my mate. It wasn't sexual, it was as if Alice was an object that belonged to him. It was obvious James was a stranger to Alice, but Alice did not seem to be a stranger to him. Odd.

As Kate introduced me and my family, Laurent was intimidated as he noticed my battle scars and Emmett's size, and he did not underestimate Rosalie or Alice, either. James and Victoria felt mostly indifferent, although both of them were radiating contempt. It was a common reaction when nomadic vampires noticed our butterscotch colored eyes and realized we did not drink from humans. Our cousins must have shared news of our diet with them. It gave them the false assumptions that we were weak. But, we were not.

"Where is Edward?" Tanya asked, confused he wasn't with us. For decades she had been trying to seduce him and was always rejected. It didn't stop her from continuing to try, however. She knew Edward had met Bella. Esme called days before and told them Edward had found his mate. She was a proud mother, after all.

"He's with _Bella_," Alice explained, with glee. She hadn't spent much time with Bella, but she already loved her like a sister.

Tanya snickered. "Edward has a human pet," she explained to the nomads. They laughed politely, but I wasn't sure if they realized she was being spiteful. All three of them felt impressed…and curious.

Emmett rolled his eyes. "It was nice to meet you," he said with uncharacteristic insincerity. "Goodbye."

I glared at James, who continued to sneak glances at Alice.

"Thank you for your hospitality," Laurent told Tanya with a bow, realizing they were no longer welcome. "We'll be on our way." He spoke with authority and James and Victoria nodded their goodbyes, as well. The three disappeared into the dark Alaskan evening.

Tanya slapped Emmett's arm. "You didn't have to be so _rude_," she admonished.

Rosalie gave her a look, and Tanya stepped back. "Sorry, Rose. But, really, Emmett, those three are just harmless nomads."

"Bella isn't Edward's pet, she's his mate. Show some respect," he replied and made his way into the lodge, Rosalie and Kate following him. Soon there were sounds of laughter as they began talking to Eleazar and Carman.

Tanya shrugged and turned to join the others. I stayed with Alice on the porch .

"Do you see anything?" I asked. "I don't trust those three."

Alice focused for a moment and shook her head. "They haven't made any decisions…..they seem to be wandering. Maybe they'll go to Fairbanks, maybe they'll stay in Denali…."

"I want you to have a good time tonight, but keep watch on them. I don't like how James was looking at you."

She smiled and stood on her tip toes to wrap her arms around my neck. "Are you _jealous_? How cute."

I shook my head. "He felt like he knew you….something was strange about it."

Noticing my seriousness, Alice became more somber. "I've never met him before. But, I'll keep watch and tell you if they do anything suspicious."

"Good. Thank you."

Alice gave me a kiss on the lips and then pulled me into the house. Conversations and laughter dominated the evening, but I remained subdued. The emotions around me were relaxed and happy, but inside I was feeling uncomfortable. I couldn't shake the feeling that something bad was going to happen.

Hours later, in the middle of a competitive game of poker, Alice snapped into a trance. We were all used to these episodes, but usually such a focused concentration meant Alice was seeing something serious about the future. We stopped our game and waited expectantly.

Alice began to shake. "Edward….Bella it may be too late."

I pounded my fists on the table. I knew immediately what had happened. "Dammit!" I yelled and whipped out my cell phone, dialing Edward's number, hoping I was wrong. It rang and rang until a scared Bella answered the phone.

Bella?" I asked, surprised. "Where is Edward?"

"Um...he's right here...but he's kind of_ freaked out_. I don't know what's happening to him."

"This is Jasper. Can I talk to him?"

"I don't think he will...he won't talk to me at all. I don't understand, why is he acting this way?"

I sighed. "Damn, I was right," I muttered. Edward had undoubtedly picked up their thoughts as the nomads approached the cabin and lost his shit, knowing his mate was in danger. My emotions had been trying to tell me, but I hadn't been able to make the connection until now. The nomads _believed_ Tanya when she referred to Bella as a human pet. It was rare, and required tremendous control, but there were some vampires who kept humans to feed on them, only they kept them alive. It was painful and cruel to the human. That's why the nomads had been impressed. They thought Edward was keeping Bella to feed on her…and probably wanted to witness this rarity and maybe even have a taste for themselves. Certainly they hadn't found many humans to find on in the Denali wilderness in the wintertime.

"In a few minutes, maybe sooner, you'll have visitors. Stay where Edward has put you and _don't move_. Whatever happens, don't move, okay?"

"What? What are you talking about? Visitors? Don't move? Are we in danger?"

"My family and I will be there as soon as we can. Edward will protect you. Everything will be alright."

When Bella didn't respond, I repeated myself. "Bella? Everything will be alright."

"Okay."

"Now repeat what I just told you."

"Whatever happens, _don't_ move."

"Correct. We'll see you soon Bella. Be safe."

I hung up the phone. Emmett and Rosalie were already standing.

"What's going on?" Carman asked, concerned.

"The nomads found Bella and Edward," Alice answered. "There _will_ be a fight. We have to leave now." She looked at our cousins expectantly.

Eleazar and Carman stood up. "Yes, we'll come with you."

Tanya was annoyed. "I'm not going to help that _human_," she spat.

Rosalie didn't say anything, but her emotions told me that she agreed with Tanya. I glanced at her in surprise and she shrugged. "I'm going to help…_Edward_."

Kate and Irnia took Tanya by the shoulders and into the next room, obviously displeased at her lack of loyality.

"We don't have time to beg Tanya to help," Alice screamed. "Come with us or not, we have to leave NOW."

She grabbed my hand and we bounded out of the lodge, running towards the family cabin. Emmett and Rosalie immediately followed, along with Carman, Eleazar, Irnia and Kate. Apparently, Tanya really had decided to stay home. _Bitch._

We saw the flames of the burning cabin miles before we arrived at the property. Alice screamed and we all began to run even faster. Our panic was overwhelming. Even Rosalie was beside herself.

"We're too late…his body would have been burned up by now…." Rosalie sobbed. Emmett put his arm around her, overcome with his own sorrow.

I tried to remain calm, and send the others calm, my years of military training and practice trying to make sense of what was happening.

"We don't know who is in there. Eleazar, Carman, check the perimeter for scents. Irinia, Kate, Emmett, Rosalie – let's keep the fire from spreading to the forest. Alice, darlin, check to see what's being decided."

Everyone sprang into action. We cleared space between the forest and the cabin, ensuring it would burn to the ground without spreading or needing to be extinguished. There was a lake nearby, but we didn't have the equipment to put out a fire. It was also too dangerous for us to be near it. Our skin was rock solid, but incredibly flammable.

"The nomads were here. But, we followed a fresh scent…..Edward's and a human…." Eleazar rushed to our group, relieved as he spoke. Everyone mirrored his relief.

"Edward took out all three of them? That's badass," Emmett remarked, impressed.

"Which direction were they headed?" I asked Eleazar.

Eleazar started to run as he responded, the group following him. "They went north…"

As we approached the trail, I caught Edward and Bella's scent. It was very fresh…they were definitely alive. I sighed in relief.

"Alice, do you see anything?" Emmett asked.

Her eyes widened and she exuded shock, but tried to hide her reaction.

"Edward went to the lodge…." she squeaked.

We were already running and headed in that direction.

"He probably needed a safe place to take his mate….I'm sure his Bella is so frightened," Kate remarked, with compassion.

"If Tanya gives Bella a hard time, I will deal with her," Emmett noted. His protectiveness of Bella was not surprising. Emmett was the most loyal member of the family. As Edward's mate, human or not, Bella was one of us.

"You're not going to lay a hand on my sister," Irnia glared at Emmett.

I sent calm towards both of them. Kate intervened.

"We'll talk to Tanya, Emmett. Don't worry."

Alice glanced at me, clearly wanting to talk in private, but didn't say a word. As we were running, she slowed so that we were at the back of the pack. I thought Alice would want to be the first one to see Edward and Bella, but she was apprehensive and a little afraid.

"What's wrong?" I whispered. The others were yards ahead of us and I spoke low enough for them to not hear.

"Edward and Bella won't be there….but they did make a visit."

"Are they alright?" I asked, concerned.

"They're in better condition than _Tanya_…."

Irinia and Kate became hysterical when they arrived at the lodge at the sight of Tanya dismembered, kneeling down to pick up the pieces.

"I'm going to call Carlisle," Alice told me, leaving to go outside. I nodded and remained to stable the emotions in the room. The Denali coven, even though they considered us family, might want to retaliate. I had to keep things calm.

Emmett and Rosalie were speechless. Carman and Eleazar glanced at each other.

"Edward didn't intend to kill her….if he had, he would have set her on fire like he did the others," Eleazar spoke carefully. Edward's scent was all over the room. It was obvious he had been the perpetrator.

"Why would Edward do this to Tanya?" Irnia sobbed. "I don't understand."

I ignored her question. "Alice is calling Carlisle. He'll be here soon to help mend Tanya. She'll be alright….eventually."

Kate and Irnia picked up the pieces of Tanya. The three sisters had been together for over a thousand years. Their loyality was first and foremost to one other.

"We don't need Carlisle's help," Kate hissed. "We will take care of our sister by ourselves. You are no longer welcome here. Leave _now_."

Irinia glared at me, Emmett and Rosalie. "Go!"

Emmett was not one to be intimidated easily. "She probably deserved it," he remarked, turning to leave.

Irinia screamed and lunged for Emmett's neck. "How dare you talk about my sister like that!"

Eleazar and Carmen intercepted Irnia, while Kate remained with Tanya's body parts. Alice returned and stood defensively by my side, along with an irate Rosalie. Emmett looked amused.

Carman and Eleazar had only been with the sisters for a hundred years or so. They were not filled with the animosity and anger the sisters were feeling, but they felt conflicted about where their loyality lie. They were also confused.

"You should go," Eleazar advised, gently. "We'll talk and find out what happened when we've all calmed down."

I nodded, sending Irnia an extra dose of relaxation. I wasn't mad at her, she was only trying to defend her sister. But, I wasn't going to let her attack my brother either.

Alice, Emmett, Rosalie and I left the lodge immediately and ran until we were out of the hearing range of the others.

"Should I call Carlisle and tell him not to come?" Alice asked.

"What will happen if he does?"

She paused, looking at the future. "They'll allow Carlisle to help. But, things will never be the same between our families."

"No kidding!" Emmett remarked. "What the hell happened? Why did Edward tear Tanya apart like that?"

Alice and I looked at each other.

"I have a theory…only going by the emotions I was reading from the nomads, that they _believed_ Tanya when she referred to Bella as Edward's human pet. They didn't realize she was being sarcastic…they thought that Bella was literally Edward's personal resource of blood. I don't know how they found the cabin, but they obviously did and I'm sure Edward went ballistic. Remember how he's been acting around us when Bella came to the house? That's how he treated his _family_. Can you imagine how he would treat a _nomad_ that wanted to drain her? They had no chance."

Emmett and Rosalie nodded, understanding, as all vampires did, the protectiveness that one felt for one's mate. Edward and Bella's relationship seemed especially intense, maybe because she was a human, or for some other reason. Anyone who tried to harm Bella, or even _think_ about harming her, would be dead.

"The nomads probably mentioned Tanya," Rosalie added. "Instead of waiting for an explanation from us, he reacted immediately. Tanya had no chance, either."

"He didn't kill her," Alice reminded us. "But, he definitely wanted to send a message."

"Don't fuck with my mate," Emmett chimed in, laughing. Rosalie jabbed him in the ribs.

"I don't think Tanya intentionally tried to hurt Bella. It wasn't her fault that the nomads misunderstood," Rosalie replied.

"It was careless of her to speak so freely around strangers," I pointed out. I turned to face my mate. "Alice, do you see where Edward and Bella are? We should find them. Edward was so upset he wouldn't even answer my call. Bella said he was freaking out, which meant he's gone into animal mode."

Alice paused, her eyes glazing over in concentration. She broke from her trance, a mixture of concern and excitement overcoming her.

"Bella is burning….she's becoming one of us!"


	27. Chapter 27

The burning did not stop. It only increased. Surely, I had gone to hell.

The pain was excruciating and indescribable. I couldn't open my eyes, but I could hear and feel what was going on around me. Someone was holding me in his arms, kissing my forehead, caressing my cheek. It was intended to be comforting, and it was good to know I wasn't alone in this hell, but it did not lessen the pain.

Occasionally the person holding me would purr and the sound of it echoed, as if we were deep in a cave. All I could concentrate on was the flames trying to consume me. Always burning, never extinguished. Despite the pain, the thing that hurt most was that I would never see Edward again. Edward would not be in this hell with me, he was too good to be exiled here. I would never look into his eyes, hear his voice, touch his body. Knowing him had been like being given a glimpse of paradise and then have it violently ripped away. I couldn't exist without him.

I felt my heartbeat slow down.

Thump, thump, thump….silence.

I opened my eyes and blinked. I was no longer in pain. I felt…._powerful._

In an instant, I jumped up on my feet in one quick motion. It was so easy to move. I looked around in the darkness, knowing I wasn't alone. I felt defensive and scared.

"Who's there?" I demanded.

A figured stepped forward from the shadows. _Edward!_

I lunged, wrapping my arms around him and holding him tight. I wanted to cry, but tears would not form.

"Edward, you're here…I thought I'd never see you again!"

I was nearly hysterical and began to cover his face with kisses. His arms were around me, but he was unusually stiff. Realizing he hadn't said anything, I paused and looked into his eyes.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

Even in the darkness, I could see that his eyes were black and his face rigid. He cupped my cheek with his hand, but didn't speak.

"Edward?" I whispered.

He was looking at me, but something was different about him. My memories felt blurry….Iremembered bits and pieces, as if the past were scenes from an old, black and white movie. Edward and I together in the cabin, our intimacy, the interruption. The burning body parts of James, Victoria and Laurent.

I glanced down at my arm, the one Victoria had ripped open with her teeth, expecting to see a bandage. I gasped at the sight an unblemished arm, no blood or scab, only a faint crescent scar. Had Edward taken me to the hospital? How could I heal so fast? How long had I been in that burning pain?

"What happened?" I asked. "Where are we?"

Edward acted as if I hadn't spoken, but he wasn't ignoring me. He was smoothing my hair, looking deeply into my eyes. It was as if he was hypnotized - fully alert, but not responsive.

I sighed and as soon as I inhaled, my throat caught on fire. It wasn't the same sensation as the burning, but it was painful. I felt like I was desperately, unquenchably thirsty.

I grabbed my throat with my hand, shocked at the intensity of the thirst. Suddenly, Edward seemed to snap out of whatever trance he was in. He grunted, took my hand into his and started running. I followed without question.

Never had I been athletic, but running felt easy. We _were_ deep in a cave, and it took a few moments to come to the surface. I was surprised at how full of color the forest was, how I noticed details of the leaves, the dimensions of the sunlight shining through the clouds. It was if I was wearing amazing contact lenses. Before everything was so dull, but now everything I saw so _alive_.

As we were running, I caught the scent of _something_. I could hear the thump of a dozen heartbeats. It was so clear that the sound scared me. Could someone be playing a surround sound stereo in the middle of the Alaskan wilderness? I looked around to check, but we were alone.

Edward led me to a meadow and there I saw a herd of deer. He looked at me and tilted his head, as if to say "_Watch_." The herd scattered, but Edward already had one in his hands and plunged his teeth into its neck. I saw him drinking the animal's blood and instead of frightening me, it did something else.

An overpowering feeling took control of my body and I chased after the deer and began to do what Edward did. I bit into one's neck and began to drink its blood. And then another. And another. And another. When I finally came to my senses, I looked back at Edward and saw a trail of dead deer between him and me. I looked at my hands and down at my clothes and I was covered in blood.

I began to panic. I just killed all those deer, drank their blood, and _liked_ it. The blood didn't satisfy me completely, but it did take a fraction of thirst away.

Where did I get the strength to do such a thing? _Why_ did I do it?

"What have I become?" I murmured to myself, starting to sob, but no tears escaped.

Realizing my distress, Edward was immediately by my side, putting his arms around me, holding me tightly. His touch brought relief and I stopped sobbing. Edward began purring and licking my neck. It felt ticklish, but also incredibly arousing.

I giggled, my mood completely changed from panic to relaxation. "Edward….what are you doing?"

He kissed my bottom lip and I realized his touch felt warm. Odd. He'd always felt cold before. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw snowflakes falling from the sky. I looked down at my bloody clothes and realized I wasn't wearing a coat, but my body wasn't cold at all. I felt perfectly comfortable.

Edward pulled me closer, titled his head, and pressed his mouth fully against mine. His lips parted and he licked my bottom lip with his tongue. I gasped in surprise, and was even more surprised when he pushed his tongue farther into my mouth. The sensation of our tongues touching ignited a passion within me. I responded instinctively, but I knew Edward had never kissed me this way before. I vaguely remembered him telling me his kisses would be too dangerous for me…but now he seemed to be kissing me the way he always wanted to and I wasn't going to complain. After all the pain I had been through, Edward hurting me was the least of my fears.

I closed my eyes as we kissed. It was passionate, urgent, but gentle, too. Edward's tongue flickered and circled my tongue, and he nibbled and sucked on my upper lip. I responded by exploring his mouth and he tasted wonderfully. Excitement began to build, our breathing increased, and I felt like every part of my body was electrified.

Suddenly, Edward stopped and leaned back. His expression reminded me of the one he gave when we were making love. I remembered that Edward could read other people's thoughts. Was someone coming to meet us?

Instead of feeling panicked, I felt oddly relaxed. The emotion conflicted with what I knew instinctively I was supposed to feel – on guard.

Edward looked around the forest and when he settled on a direction, he stood in front of me, but crouched into a defensive position, ready to attack. The trees rustled and two men and one woman stood before us. Their eyes were not blood red, like the vampires Edward had destroyed, but somehow I knew they were vampires. I could smell them and they each had a unique scent.

Before I realized what I was doing, a growl came from deep within my body and I parted my lips to show my teeth. If Edward had not been holding me back, I think I would have attacked.

"Bella, it's me Carlisle," a gentle voice greeted. "I'm here with Jasper and Alice."

I calmed slightly, immediately embarrassed that I had reacted that way, but I still felt uneasy. _Carlisle_. Edward's father. I remembered meeting him. But, he looked different to me now. It was the same when I glanced at Alice. She looked different, too. Sharper, more clearly defined. Jasper…he looked _scary_. I'd never noticed the crescent shaped scars on his neck before. They looked the same as the one on my arm. Were they bite marks? How did he get those? How did he survive? Jasper smiled at me and I relaxed.

Edward didn't speak to his family, but remained crouched. He didn't growl, but I was afraid that any moment he would attack them. He was too rigid, too tense.

I put a hand on his shoulder. "Edward, it's alright. It's your family."

I didn't fully _trust_ his family, but I didn't think they would hurt us, either. After being attacked my the trio of vampires, and then hours, days, weeks, who knows how long, of being in pain, the only person I trusted at that moment was Edward. But, something made me feel like we were safe.

He didn't respond and his family were motionless, but watching us closely. I leaned down to whisper into his ear.

"Edward, they won't hurt us."

He examined the family for a moment, then grunted and stood up. But, instead of simply holding my hand, he wrapped me in a full embrace, his grip tight. I had to turn to my head and peak around Edward's shoulder to look at them.

It seemed like Edward had forgotten how to speak, so I took the initiative. I didn't know if the family knew what had happened to us.

"A group of vampires found us at the cabin. They attacked me and Edward retaliated. He set the cabin on fire and burned up their bodies. Then, I think he took me to this cave and that's where we've been. I'm not sure. I was in so much pain until today."

Carlisle's eyes were full of compassion. "I'm so sorry that you had to face this all alone. As soon as we realized you were in danger, the family came to help, but it was too late."

I shook my head. There was no reason for him to apologize. "It was a surprise. You couldn't have known. Besides, Edward took care of it."

Despite the gruesomeness of the whole ordeal, I was proud of Edward for protecting me. I survived, thanks to him, and that's all that mattered.

Alice seemed to be bursting at the seams, having a hard time not talking. I looked at her curiously. It seemed to give her permission to talk.

"Bella…you look beautiful! How do you feel?" she asked excitedly.

I scrunched up my face. I was covered in blood, my hair was a mess, and I'd apparently been living in a cave. How could I look beautiful? And I'd also just drank from the blood of animals. Maybe I have a post-traumatic stress disorder, I thought. I wasn't ashamed at killing the animals. I only wanted more.

I answered honestly. "I feel _thirsty_."

Jasper nodded, seeming to expect my answer. "And you've hunted?"

"Um, I guess that's what you'd call it."

I looked at Edward who was glaring at his family.

"Do you know why Edward is acting like this?" I asked. I was worried. He looked incredibly stressed out. "He won't speak to me, but he seems to know what's going on."

"He feels threatened. After all you've been through, he's reverted to operating completely by instinct. He'll recover, but it may take awhile."

I would be with him as long as it took to recover and even if he never spoke to me again, I would never leave his side.

"What can I do to help him?" I asked.

"Assure him that you're safe. Be with him."

It seemed simple enough. I nodded.

"I have no idea where we are, but can we get a ride back to my cabin in Fairbanks?"

The three of them exchanged uneasy glances.

Carlisle shook his head. "You can't return to your cabin, Bella. It's not safe."

I was confused and outraged. "What do you mean it's not safe?"

"It's not safe for _you_ to be around the humans," Alice jumped in to explain.

These vampires were being weird. I didn't understand.

"I'm a human, too, remember?" I pointed out. "Do you mean it's not safe for Edward to be around humans because of the way he's acting?"

That made more sense to me. If he acted this way towards his family, how much more stressed out would he be around strangers?

"Bella, you're not a human anymore…" Alice answered.

"Easy now," Jasper interrupted, putting a hand on Alice's shoulder, not taking his eyes off Edward.

I began to feel nervous. What did she mean I wasn't human anymore? A thousand images flashed through my mind at once. Victoria biting me. The burning. Running so quickly. Seeing so sharply. Hearing so loudly. Drinking the blood of animals. Edward taking no caution in kissing me. I gasped.

"You're one of us now," Carlisle told me. "We're not sure who changed you, but it happened."

I _did_ feel different, but it was such an impossible thing to imagine. Could it be true?

"I can explain everything to you," Carlisle offered, "if you just come with us…."

At the words _come with us_, Edward growled loudly, venom dripping from his mouth. In a flash, he threw me over his shoulder and began to run.

In the distance, I could hear his family call out to him, but Edward did not listen.


	28. Chapter 28

**A/N:** Warning. Lemon! (Not entirely my own writing, but inspired by another story I read, FYI.)

Only a couple of chapters left. Thank you for all the reviews. I hope to reply soon!

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"_You're one of us now."_

Carlisle's words echoed in my head as Edward and I returned to the cave. The family did not follow us and I was thankful for this. Edward would have surely attacked. Even once we were in the privacy and security of the cave, Edward placed me in a corner and crouched in front of me, still growling, venom still dripping from his mouth.

I confess I didn't pay much attention to Edward's behavior in that moment, as I tried to digest the news that I had been changed. I was a _vampire_? I didn't know whether to happy or sad. On one hand, I knew this meant I could be with Edward forever as his equal, my human frailty no longer an issue for us. But, it also meant I could never return to my old life. As Alice said, it wasn't safe for me to be around humans. I thirsted for their blood. It may take years to be able to withstand temptation. Would I never see my parents again? What about my job and school?

My memories felt so blurry, but I tried hard to focus on the details Edward told me about vampires. He never told me how a person became one, but that vampires thirsted human blood and his family chose to drink from animals. Their self control allowed them to be able to interact with human society, go to school, hold jobs. But, it was doubtful I would be able to return to the bookstore or finish my degree any time in the near future.

I had so many questions, but Edward wasn't able to answer them right now. It was obvious he was in deep stress and I didn't know how to help him. But, I was going to try.

I stood on my knees and leaned forward, pressing my body against his back, wrapping my arms around him. I kissed him on the neck.

"Edward, we're safe," I whispered into his ear.

He grunted and shook his head. Okay, so he seemed to understand me. This was progress.

I put my hands on his shoulders and began to massage. Could vampires have tense muscles? For Edward it certainly seemed so. I felt him physically react to my touch and relax, but only a fraction. I kissed him again, under his earlob, and continued to massage. He stopped growling and his breathing became even.

My hands moved from his shoulders, to rubbing his back and running my fingers through his hair. I took my time, enjoying touching him as much as he seemed to like to be touched.

In a flash of a second, Edward turned around and lifted me up, so that were both standing and facing one another. His eyes were still black, but there was a spark of desire. It wasn't what I expected, but I welcomed it. He cupped my face with his hands and kissed me…hard.

His hands roamed all over me and he began to rip my clothes off my body. I gasped in surprise, but found myself doing the same thing to him. It was so effortless, the cotton and denim ripping as they were pieces of tissue. With his hand cupped against my head, he pressed me against the wall of the cave and pulled my leg up against his hip, pressing his groin against me. Grinding against me, he was not being gentle, but he wasn't hurting me either.

Tilting my head back, I moaned as I felt his throbbing erection press into me. I rolled my hip against his, but he pushed me against the wall. I leaned my head forward, licking and tugging on his ear, wrapping my leg around his waist. I didn't realize I could be so _flexible_.

I spread my legs more and Edward began to thrust. He groaned as I gripped his biceps and thrusted back up against him, giving it back to him as hard as he was giving it. I felt my core tighten around his member, the sound of our skin smacking against each other echoing throughout the cave. I shifted myself up, so that both legs were wrapped around Edward's waist, and he squeezed my bottom, going even deeper inside me than before.

I groaned in pleasure and Edward licked my lips and continued to thrust hard and deep, faster and faster. Euphoria hit me with such a force that it seemed to affect Edward as well. His last thrusts were erratic, but forceful. Panting, he collapsed against me, leaning his head on my shoulder. I wrapped my arms around Edward and felt him relax inside me.

He pulled me down to the ground, where he laid on top of me, but continued to nuzzle his face in the crook of my neck.

"I love you," I whispered, my eyes closed, feeling the warmth of his embrace and intimacy I felt with him after our love making. The sound of his voice surprised me.

"I love you, too…" Edward responded, his tone vulnerable.

Running my fingers through his hair, I sighed happily. My Edward was back.

However, it took several more sessions of love making for Edward to be able to hold an actual conversation with me. I didn't know how much time passed, but I felt an unquenchable desire for Edward. I always wanted more of him. After awhile, the burning in my throat, my thirst, began to dominate my attention. It disappointed me to know that while I wanted Edward, at that moment I wanted blood more.

With Edward seemingly back to his old self, I thought it would be safe to suggest hunting. I didn't think I could go another second without relief. When enough time passed after our last joining together, I told him my need.

"I'm thirsty," I acknowledged, embarrassed to be so needy and dependent. Would I feel this way for the rest of eternity?

Edward nodded, understanding. "Let's hunt."

I looked down at my naked body and the pile of shredded clothes on the floor of the cave.

"I have nothing to wear….what if we see someone?"

Edward visibly tensed and I immediately regretted bringing up the possibility of _others_. I didn't want him to feel so threatened again, although it seemed like the worst had passed. He looked at the blankets, also on the floor, the ones he had wrapped me in when we left the cabin.

"I'll make something to cover us," he offered, leaning down and picking up the cloth.

He worked fast, but it was no longer in a blur. I saw his hands moving quickly as he fashioned a toga-like dress for me to wear. For himself, he wrapped a loin cloth around his waist. Being in a cave, wrapping ourselves in cloth, felt very primitive and cave man like. Edward had already thrown me over his shoulder like a cave man. I smiled, thinking about what a far cry it was from the Cullen mansion and Edward's fancy things at home.

Edward returned my smile, looking at me curiously. "If only I could read your mind," he commented, shaking his head.

I shrugged, thinking that if he _was_ able to read my mind, the most dominant thought was about my thirst. I swallowed, feeling the pain of burning.

"Let's get you fed, shall we?"

It was amazing that the last time Edward had probably said that to me was when he was cooking me bacon and eggs for breakfast when I was a human. Now the words had an entirely different connotation.

I nodded and he took my hand, leading me out of the cave. I desperately hoped his family did not interrupt us again. I wanted to see them, but I didn't know how fragile Edward felt.

Thankfully, we were able to hunt in peace and do so until I felt almost satisfied, but not quite. I seemed by thirst would always be there, but after hours of hunting, the pain was a bit more manageable.

"So what are we going to do now?" I asked Edward, as we walked hand in hand, through the snow, to nowhere in particular. We weren't heading in the direction of the cave.

"We're going somewhere you'll be safe," he answered firmly, squeezing my hand.

Uh oh. I didn't know if I liked the sound of that.


	29. Chapter 29

**A/N: **Thanks to **gredelina1** for pre-reading and improving this story with her ideas. Also, thanks to **dipsydoodle** previous review that I included as a detail in the chapter.

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**EPOV**

"So what are we going to do now?" Bella asked.

"We're going somewhere you'll be safe," I answered firmly.

I was glad to be able to communicate in sentences instead of grunts. Making love to Bella...truly consummating our bond without human precautions, helped me to begin to return to rational thought.

"Somewhere _safe_?" Bella asked. "Where would that be?"

"With my family," I answered.

"Really?" She was surprised.

I nodded. "While we were hunting I heard their thoughts. All _six_ of them began to persuade me to bring you home." I smiled wryly.

None of them were confident I was paying attention to their thoughts, but they still tried to communicate with me.

Carlisle and Esme were gentle and encouraging.

_We love you both. Please let us help you._

Alice was impatient, Jasper supportive.

_Don't steal my new sister from me! I understand how you feel._

Emmett was funny and Rosalie had been the most persistent and annoying of them all.

_Bro, you have to return to us so we can kick some more Denali ass together._

_Come home, come home, come home, come home, come home, come home._

"Are you okay with that? You didn't react too well the last time you saw them."

Bella was being gracious with me, as she always was. No, I didn't "react too well." She had no idea how close I had come to attacking my own family. Jasper felt it, I knew, but Carlisle and Alice weren't aware of it either. I still operating fully on instinct and when they approached us, I was going to tear them to pieces, but I wanted to stay with Bella to keep her safe. The three of them together reminded me too much of the three nomads, even though their thoughts were very different.

"I regret that. I was still recovering from…what happened. I still felt threatened and wanted to protect you. Instinct took over. But, I think I'm calming down….and my family made a convincing argument You're a newborn and need support."

At some point, all of them had mentioned that Bella being with the family during her newborn year would be helpful. The most convincing arguments came from those I had witnessed being newborns – Esme, Rosalie and Emmett. They all reminded me of their mood swings and thirst and how the others guided them through it. As much as I wanted to be alone with Bella, I knew as a newborn she needed support.

"_Newborn_?" Bella asked. Of course, she had never heard the term before. We'd never had one conversation about what it meant to become a vampire, especially one that followed our diet. I regretted that deeply. I didn't prepare her. She was forced into this life.

When Victoria bit into Bella, something within me snapped. I was already almost incoherently protective, but injuring my mate physically pushed me over the edge. Laurent had been trying to actually help Bella. He had a crush on Irnia and thought he would impress her _and _stay in my family's good graces if he helped. Other than the Volutri, there weren't any covens as large as the Cullens. Laurent was right to be intimidated. We were dangerous, if we chose to be.

A rage I never knew was possible rose within me. A red haze blinded me and instinct took over completely. I barely realized what I was doing. With ease, I tore Laurent and Victoria to pieces. James was too stunned to move, but by the time he did, I had finished with his partners and then ripped him from limb to limb. Apart from caring for Bella, my entire being cried _kill, kill, kill_. It wasn't until I left Tanya's that I was able to pause and realize Bella was being changed. I was glad she wasn't dying, but I was disappointed it was Victoria's venom that was changing her and not mine.

As we were running, I sucked Victoria's venom out of Bella's blood, almost to the point of killing her. It was dangerous and selfish of me, but Bella was _my_ mate. I wanted _my _venom to change her. I wasn't thinking rationally. If I had been in my right mind, I would have considered keeping Bella human. But, my animalistic side wanted to claim her.

I didn't know if I was successful, but when Bella awoke, her new vampire scent had a touch of my own. Bella was magnificent and I breathed a sigh of relief, mentally, when she awoke and instantly recognized me. We all carried a hint of our sire's scent and I made the right decision. But, now that I was thinking rationally, I regretted I hadn't prepared her for it all. I had no idea what she thought about it, either. Did she feel like a monster?

"You're a newborn _vampire_," I explained, regret in my voice. "I'm sorry it happened this way…that you didn't have a choice." I stopped walking and looked into her eyes. "Tell me what you're thinking. Do you hate what you've become?"

She shook her head. "I'm like you now. I didn't know it was possible and I have a million questions, but because of it we can be together forever. How could I hate that?"

I stroked her cheek with my hand, feeling full of love for her. "You're too generous," I whispered and leaned down to kiss her.

Bella sighed. "Thank you for protecting me, for saving me," she said.

My eyes widened. There was no need to thank me for what was instinctual. "You're my mate. I'd do anything to keep you safe."

She wrapped her arms around my neck and pulled me down to kiss her again. After a few moments, I began to hear Alice yelling at me.

_You can do that when you get home! You've kept us waiting too long. If you keep kissing Bella it will be another few days before you return and I'm impatient!_

I stopped kissing Bella and began to laugh softly. It felt good to laugh, after the intensity of the last few days. Bella looked at me curiously, smiling, and I explained.

"Alice is telling me that if we continue kissing like this it'll be days before we make it back home."

Her smile widened. "Well, she _can_ see the future."

_Do really want to see Irnia or Kate? You'll snap back into warrior mode. Bella is a newborn. She shouldn't have to calm __you__ down. It'll be safer if you were home. NOW._

I sighed. "Alice is right. It would be safer if we left the area."

Bella panicked. "Are we in danger?"

I shook my head. "No. But, if I see the Denali sisters there will be a confrontation. They're not happy with what I did to their sister. To keep the peace, we should probably _never_ see them again."

"What happened? What did you do?"

I knew Bella wasn't aware of what I had done to Tanya. I had never told her about the Denali clan and she wouldn't have understood what Laurent meant when he mentioned Tanya. I took my hand and we began to run.

"Tanya, one of the Denalis that we consider to be trusted family, told the nomads that you were my human pet. It made them curious and they came looking for us. If I had been more rational at the time, I would have realized she was being sarcastic and the nomads misunderstood her. But, once my primal instincts took over, it was too hard to suppress. I had to retaliate. Tanya had to pay for what she did."

"You didn't kill her, though," she noted, apparently remembering I didn't set fire to Tanya's lodge the way he did to the nomads at he cabin.

"No. When I heard you whimpering on the porch, a tiny shred of my remaining humanity distracted me. Tanya should thank you. I spared her life because of you."

It was true. I was so close to finishing Tanya off until I heard Bella. Our families would have surely gone to war if I _had_ killed Tanya. Since she _would_ eventually recover, perhaps there wouldn't be war, but there would never be peace.

"Will her family want revenge?"

I shrugged, trying to appear nonchalant and not worry Bella. "Tanya will recover. If we keep our distance, things will probably be fine." I wasn't so confident about that, though.

Bella still looked worried and I squeezed her hand. "Don't worry. You're safe. If they do try to attack, it will be seven vampires against three. It won't even be a fair fight."

"_Eight_," Bella corrected. "I can fight, too."

The idea of Bella fighting terrified me, but I grinned. Looking at her, it was clear she wasn't a weak human anymore, but I wouldn't let her be in danger. "Yes, you _can_ fight, but it's my job as your mate to make sure that you don't need to."

"Relationship rules still apply. We decided to make decisions together. Talk about things. Remember?"

I stopped running and turned to face Bella. She was completely right. I was already making decisions for her by telling her we were returning to my family. She deserved to be consulted and be able to voice her opinion. I respected her and wanted to prove it.

"You're completely right. I should have asked first. Do _you_ want to return to my family?"

**BPOV**

Edward's question was unexpected, but I understood why he was asking. He _had _made a decision for us, without talking to me about it. I'd met all of his family members, heard many stories about them, but I barely knew them. It was a valid question.

His question also reminded me of a conversation we had when I was human. He said he would leave his family if I asked him to. I remembered how sincere he was and I remembered how I felt I would never ask him to do such a thing.

I was alone, basically, but Edward had a family. Brothers and sisters. A mother and father. A _vampire _family, definitely unconventional, but it was a family nonetheless. I didn't know what to expect, whether they would welcome me or not, but I wanted to give it a try for Edward's sake.

"Yes, I think returning to your family is the right thing to do."

He smiled. "I'll always feel protective of you, but I trust my family. They're really looking forward to spending time with you…._if_ I choose to share you." He squeezed my bottom and pressed me into him. Desire ignited within me. I smiled.

"Maybe Alice was right. Maybe it will be a few days before we see them…."

Edward kissed my neck. "We'll have plenty of time to be alone together…once we're home."

I groaned, feeling surprised at how quickly my mood changed from desire to annoyance. Maybe this is what Edward needed when he said a newborn needed support.

"Okay…" I grumbled, holding his hand and pouting like a child.

He put his hand on my chin and kissed me on the lips, but didn't say anything. We began to run again and didn't stop until we were in the woods behind the Cullen lodge.

I tensed, picking up the scents of the family. I didn't know how to be a vampire, but this part felt instinctual. I remembered Carlisle, Alice and Jasper's scents clearly, but there were three others that were unfamiliar. I guessed they belong to Esme, Rosalie and Emmett. I felt suspicious and on guard. I gripped Edward's hand so hard until he winced in pain. I released my hand, shocked that I had the strength to physically hurt him.

"Sorry!" I gasped.

He shook his hand. "It's fine. As a newborn you're much stronger than me. You're stronger than our entire family, even Emmett. He's already thinking of arm wrestling you."

I smiled at Edward's joke. There was no way Emmett would want to arm-wrestle me, I was too small and weak to be a challenge. We slowly walked up to the back of the house. Edward seemed to know I needed time to acclimate myself to the scents of other vampires.

Surprisingly, Alice was the only one to greet us. She bounded out into the snow to throw her arms around Edward and me. Both of us were rigid, but didn't stop her from hugging us.

"Edward, Bella, welcome home!" she exclaimed, then stepped back to look at us head to toe. "Interesting outfits," she added, disapprovingly, noticing the toga and loincloth Edward fashioned out of blankets.

"Alice, it's good to see you," Edward replied warmly. I was glad to see him relaxed and not growling at his sister.

"Hi," I greeted shyly. Where was the rest of the family? If they were so anxious for us to return, why didn't they come to meet us like Alice?

"We have a surprise for you two!" Alice interrupted my thoughts.

"Really?" Edward asked, with an eyebrow raised. He once told me there were no secrets in his family, due to his mind reading and Alice's future telling.

Alice nodded. "It was difficult to keep it from you, but we did. I think you'll like it."

She grabbed my hand and began to walk off, then stopped herself.

"Before I show you the surprise, we need to do something about your clothes."

She looked at Edward and he nodded. I wondered if other family members got annoyed at their silent conversations.

I followed Alice and Edward into the lodge and to Edward's bedroom. Alice disappeared for a second and then returned with a pile of clothes in her hand.

"For you," she said, handing them to me. As she closed the door, she waved her finger. "Five minutes only…no time for hanky panky."

I felt embarrassed, but I couldn't blush, at Alice's assumption. Was everyone in Edward's family so "open" about things like that? After all, Alice was the one who gave Edward condoms….

Noticing my discomfort, Edward hugged me. "All newly mated couples desire time to themselves…not just us. Alice didn't mean to embarrass you. I don't think she realizes that because we met when you were human you're still learning what it means to be mated."

"So much to learn," I sighed.

Edward cupped my breast and nuzzled my neck. "And all the time in the world…."

I felt I would melt as Edward tore the toga off me, but he redressed me quickly, making it clear we would not be getting intimate. I tried not to show my disappointment. He also dressed himself quickly, took my hand and led me back outside. Alice was waiting for us.

She smiled and waved for us to follow her. She ran into the woods and then came to a clearing, where there stood a cabin that looked almost exactly like mine old dry cabin in Fairbanks. The door opened and the other family members came walking out.

"It's _yours_," Alice squealed.

I looked at Edward, then back at Alice and the family. "You built us a cabin?"

Esme nodded. "We did the same for Emmett and Rosalie when they met. We thought it would be good for you to have a place of your own, but still be near the family."

Oh, the Cullens and their generosity. A very extravagant welcome home present.

"Welcome to the family, Bella," Carlisle greeted, but he kept his distance.

"Rosalie and I welcome you to the family, too," Emmett added, his arm around his wife. I had already seen Carlisle, Jasper and Alice with vampire eyes, but now it was like I was seeing Rosalie and Emmett for the first time. Rosalie was even more beautiful, if that was possible, than I remembered. Emmett was also much larger and intimidating than I remembered, too. Rosalie wasn't smiling like Emmett, but his smile was almost exaggerated. His personality seemed larger than life…almost like a perfect older brother. I was looking forward to getting to know him better.

Jasper nodded and I smiled. I suspected he was the one making me feel calmer and open to trusting the family. I did feel very comfortable with them, once my initial suspicious of new vampires settled.

Edward remained holding my hand as the family began to greet him. Esme gave him a long hug, Rosalie gave a shorter hug and Emmett punched him in the arm. Carlisle shook his hand and Jasper nodded, probably communicating with emotions than physically touching him. It was fascinating to watch the family interact with Edward. Their affection for him was genuine. They seemed relieved to see him. Even though my human memories were fuzzy, I didn't remember having that connection with Charlie or Renee. The Cullens may be vampires, but it was clear they really were a family. They loved one another.

There was a lot to talk about, after all that had happened, but I began to feel anxious and overwhelmed. I stood silently, though, listening to them all talk. My mood felt erratic and irrational. I was happy to be with the family, but I also felt irritable. Jasper glanced at me, then Edward immediately stopped talking and looked at me.

"Would you like to see inside?" he asked me. I nodded, welcoming the chance to be alone with him.

I smiled shyly at the family and followed Edward inside the cabin. The layout was exactly the same as my old place, but the details and furnishings were much better. I gasped when I noticed my own books on the bookshelf. I looked around and noticed several other personal belongings.

"My things!" I hadn't thought about it, but I was very happy to have familiar things surrounding me. My irritability calmed down.

Edward smiled. "Nice touch," he agreed. Carlisle and Esme joined us inside.

"Do you like it?" Esme asked. She seemed as shy as me. I instantly felt connected with her.

Although Edward was still holding my hand, with my other free hand, I hugged Esme.

"Thank you, Esme. It's wonderful."

She smiled and glanced at Edward. "It's perfect," he told her.

"How did you get my things?" I asked.

"Emmett and Rosalie went and collected them. We had to concoct a story about your disappearance, since you're a newborn and won't be able to encounter humans for at least a year," Carlisle answered.

Esme nodded. "Thankfully, we have a lot of experience in covering our tracks."

"What's the story?" Edward asked.

"Well, Alice called UAF posing as Bella and explained she would be withdrawing from classes this semester and taking a year off to travel. We also said the same thing to your landlord and paid your rent for several months in advance, so there was no penalty in breaking your lease so suddenly. Carlisle personally visited Dave at the bookstore and explained to him that Bella and Edward had _eloped_."

Eloped? I had to laugh at that. Not because it was unbelievable, but because in a way, we _had_ eloped. We ran away and didn't plan on coming back. My mind drifted to my parents. What would I tell them? I rarely called and could go a year without seeing them. Maybe I could simply email and say I was traveling for a year and would keep in touch? Maybe a phone call?

"I'll need to call my parents," I said, solemnly. Carlisle and Esme glanced at each other, then at Edward.

"Love, I'm sorry but you can't call them. The tone of your voice has changed and they'll know something is different."

"Oh." Email was probably better anyway. On the phone they may ask too many questions. "I'll email them, then."

Edward looked at Carlisle and then back at me. He seemed to want to say more.

"What?"

"Email is fine for now, but you won't be able to see your parents again and eventually we're going to have to….fake your death. I'm so sorry."

My mouth opened in shock. Before, when Edward asked if _I_ would leave_ my_ family, it had been a serious question. He knew it was a possibility.

"Why?"

"If they see you, they'll instantly know something has happened to you. And as a vampire, you're immortal. You won't age and your parents will notice. There aren't any "vampire rules" other than to maintain secrecy. If your parents knew you were a vampire, they'd be in danger. We have to protect them," Carlisle answered. "We could have them think you ran away, but the kindest thing would be for them to have closure. Faking your death will give them a clean break."

I sighed, feeling the weight of Carlisle's words. What he said made sense, but it was just a shock to realize I would never see my parents again. I felt sad about it and yet, looking at Edward, I knew _he_ was the most important person in my world. I would miss my parents, but Edward was my future.

"I understand," I said quietly.

Edward rubbed my back. "We'll send Charlie and Renee a check, to make sure they're taken care of. Who knew you had a very generous life insurance policy?"

I grinned at Edward's attempt to cheer me up, and also at his tendency to want to spend money on my behalf. Carlisle and Esme nodded, seeming to agree with Edward.

"Whatever you think is best," I found myself saying. I had never faked a death before and it seemed like the Cullens had. I would trust their experience.

"We don't have to do it now, darling," Esme spoke compassionately. "You can email your parents and in a few months we'll discuss the details of it all."

"Okay," I replied.

Esme patted my arm, then she and Carlisle disappeared in a flash, even fast by vampire standards. Edward and I were alone.

He picked me up in his arms and carried me up to the loft and placed me on the bed. It reminded me so much of my cabin, even the sheets were the same. The familiarity made me feel as if I was home.

I looked at Edward. Actually, home was wherever he was. Only a couple of weeks ago I was a fiercely independent, reclusive college student. I didn't think true love existed. Then, I met a man in the bookstore who made me feel complete. Something had been missing, but I didn't realize it until I met him. He was my other half.

I smiled slightly, realizing how much Edward had changed my world.

**The End**


	30. PS

**P.S.**

I'm sad this story is finished, but it's been so fun writing it.

If you have an outtake/one shot request from My Other Half, please let me know.

Also, if you liked **My Other Half**, please tell your friends about it! If you promote it somewhere (A Different Forest, Facebook, wherever) tell me about so I can thank you!

My latest Bella and Edward stories are about grief and angst:

**Consolation** - When Bella's mother dies she moves to live with her father in Forks. She is overwhelmed with grief. Who will comfort her? Twilight AU

**Walk Away** - It never made sense for him to love me. So, when she told me he didn't, I believed her. New Moon. AU.

Thank you for reading, for supporting this story with your reviews, and for all your great ideas that inspired me. It's been an encouragement to me. THANK YOU!


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